So why did Cleophas decide to murder her fellow Iron
Sister? It turns out she’s a Valentine loyalist into that whole “let’s murder
all downworlders” kind of thing. AND she duly reports to her master to tell him
how very very very very special Clary is with her super special rune of
specialness.
Speaking of specialness, Clary is also hearing some
strange noises no-one else can here.
Cleophas to re-prove her loyalty to Valentine so plans to
kidnap Clary relying on her very terrible decision making. This is reasonable,
Clary does make some very very terrible decisions. So much so that this episode
I don’t know which terrible decisions are her ruse with Luke and which terrible
decisions are actually real.
Cleophas inflicts the most fake and shallow of cuts to
try and pretend to be mortally wounded to appeal to here werewolf brother Luke
and Clary for help. Since she is a Valentine loyalist she hates all downworlders
including her werewolf brother and apparently they have terrible painful
history and Luke would quite like her to die in any number of fires. Clary,
being Clary, pushes for a reunion and how important family is and decides she
has even the slightest right to comment on this or stick her arrogant nose in.
Because she’s Clary
Luke is also convinced Cleophas, Circle loyalist, is a
bad person. Clary doesn’t believe him because FAMILY and she knows waaay better
than him about his own family. Because Clary is the worst. But then this near
stranger calls her CLARISSA which only Valentine does so this is proof she’s
evil (or, y’know, a near stranger from a very formal quasi-holy order who
perhaps isn’t willing to use diminutives/nicknames with you? But hey, but all
means take this as more probative than Luke’s intimate knowledge of his own
family history. Clary Is The Worst).
Also I kind of wonder about the Garroway parents who
chose a relatively mundane “Luke” then decided to swing way out there on “Cleophas.”
Clary The Worst changes to plan B which involves walking
into Cleophas’s trap to achieve something. What I’m not sure except just
wandering around and making bad decisions and expecting the plot armour to save
her. Whether Luke’s in on it or not Clary tases him and runs off with Cleophas.
I don’t know what Clary’s follow up plan was except it
definitely involves no Clave backup except Jace because why would you want
armed back up to deal with Valentine? Nah that would be too sensible
Instead luckily the weird noise strikes Clary again and
this time Cleophas uses a rune to hear it to – it’s the sound of an Angel in
distress. Cleophas makes the huge assumption that the angel is in distress
because of Valentine. This confirms to Ceophas how very special Clary is because
she’s tuned into angel radio and that makes up for her complete lack of common
sense. It also really shakes her faith in Valentine because no matter how much she
and he hates downworlders, torturing angels is a definite no-no.
So time to walk into Valentine’s trap and while Luke and
Valentine face off while Valentine is held hostage, Clary and Jace fight three
shadowhunters on the roof. Y’know what would help in this situation? More back
up. Because Luke facing Valentine alone ends up with Valentine escaping. Clary
and Jace do manage to take out the evil shadowhunters – but only because Clary
has downloaded mega-fighting skills from somewhere. Give Shadowhunters train
their whole life, when does she become powerful enough to fight off 2 at once?
She also has the super special rune to free the angel
from his chains so he can assume his true form. Which is really unimpressive. I
mean ragged wings and that’s about it Not impressed at all. You can do better, Shadowhunters.
Time to catch up on side storylines: Izzy is struggling
with addiction to the evil demon drug that Victor got her hooked on because…
because this is Shadowhunters and
no-one makes good decisions. Izzy looks for more but Victor’s run out and
looking for a dealer puts her on Magnus’s radar (who is, of course, willing to
run and rescue because this is what he exists for). This leaves Izzy having to
go to the source – the drug is made from vampire venom. After trying to get
Simon to bite her she turns to vampire producers of the drug. This will not end
well
She’s also super pissed with Clary for hiding her super rune from her – since Izzy has done so much to trust her, help her and generally be a friend to her and Clary won’t even show basic trust. This is presented more of Izzy’s addiction based irritability rather than
Over to Simon – after a shirtless scene to remind us that
while Simon has a very very very ripped body complete with 8 pack. In the first
moment of actual decent acting, Clary is reduced to a bit of a stammering mess
seeing his rippled physique. He heads off to a date with Maia being super duper
awkward and being generally bad and awkward. Even worse he turns to Jace for
advice on how to be good with women (Jace has been seen with a whole string of
women in and out of bed this episode) and nearly ruins his date by trying to
imitate Jace. It doesn’t help that Jace basically tries to ruin his self
confidence with disparaging comments about his appearance
It feels faintly bizarre that this show seems determined
to downplay Simon’s attractiveness when talking to Jace; clearly aiming for someone
geeky, nerdy, sweet but not as physically conventionally attractive as Jace. But
then they went to casting they just couldn’t actually bring themselves to cast
someone who isn’t rocking 2% body fat. It’s weird because there’s no
development of that; at very least we need some exploration of WHY Simon
clearly isn’t seeing what we’re seeing when he looks in the mirror and perhaps
some intervention on that score: not just a “hey you’re sweet and funny” but “you
realise you’re smoking hot, right?” Because without addressing it, there’s this
weird feeling we’re expected to buy Jace’s narrative of Simon’s appearance
(while still accepting Jace’s ultra-confidence could make Simon’s looks work
because he’s just that good) but the casting director simply couldn’t bring
themselves to not cast a gorgeous person and just have everyone pretend they’re
not gorgeous (Renee and I joke that Freeform is CW on a budget – and only
pretty people may apply). I think without that this is damaging – without the
exploration of body image and confidence and how even beautiful people can
often only see their flaws we’re literally presenting this man, with that body,
as physically unappealing when he has a body that most men couldn’t even hope
to achieve. I’m going to have to chew this over but
Even when the date is a disaster (because Simon follows
Jace’s advice) it’s because he isn’t being himself – and Maia fell for the
geeky Simon. Which is great advice for anyone and definitely not something I
have a problem with – but we still seem to be putting Simon in an odd, awkward,
uncomfortable, ill-fitting box.
In the end they don’t head down the relationship road
despite really liking each other because it’s obvious to Maia and everyone else
that Simon is still pining after Clary.
Over to Magnus and Alec – and their relationship is
definitely progressing. Off screen. There’s no development here, we’re just
jumping several stages with references to lots of world-wide visits they’re taking
together without seeing any of it. Alec has got Magnus a gift which is touching
because no-one gives Magnus anything – they just make endless demands of him.
Oh Shadowhunters lampshading how
everyone treats Magnus as a servant doesn’t make it ok or not problematic if
they keep doing it and he keeps letting them.
Every kiss they have is even interrupted by Jace (having
sex in Magnus’s house where he is staying. Tacky, man. Very tacky) or the Clave
so we have lots of almost. And when Alec finally discusses taking the next step
and having sex with Magnus (Alec is a virgin and we briefly touch on his
anxiety here. Briefy) there’s another fade to black. I just saw Jace rolling
around in bed with a completely strange naked woman and now we get a fade to
black? Hmmmm.
I’m glad Magnus and Alec now have a relationship beyond
service – but it’s happening entirely off screen. It’s a “lets take this as
done” and we’ve still had more development of Maia and Simon’s non-existent
relationship than Alec and Magnus’s real one
