Monday, March 11, 2019

Fangs For the Fantasy and the Future





Fangs for the Fantasy is something we’re both incredibly proud of and it has been a truly passionate labour of love over these last 8 years

We love this genre (and celebrate how it has gone from the geeky ignored in the corner to the mainstream powerhouse it is) and social justice and it’s part in the media - we do think it’s vitally important to analyse all media through the lens of diversity and inclusion - even the media that is so often dismissed. We’re very happy with the work, the analysis, the reviews and the recaps we’ve produced

Unfortunately, as our readers have probably seen, our content has been dropping for some time now. While we love what we do at Fangs, ultimately we are only two people and, as real life consumes us we find ourselves not having time for Fangs that Fangs deserves. And because we do love Fangs so much and are so pleased with what we have produced here, we’re reluctant to let Fangs fade into a shadow of what it once and would rather draw a curtain over it.

It is with great sadness that we are no longer producing regular content for Fangs for the Fantasy. We love it too much to give it less than what it needs. The site will remain up and its contents intact but we cannot continue to dedicate the time to it it needs.

We are deeply grateful to all of you have been with us, supported us, commented and taken part in these discussions. We may still post the odd video on our Youtube channel when we have things that just need saying.


Friday, March 1, 2019

The Magicians: Season 4, Episode 6: A Timeline and a Place





Penny has been kidnapped and locked in a magical cage - as has Marina. They’ve been captured by Daniel - a Horomancer. A rare magical talent based on manipulating time. And he’s captured them both because they’re outside their actual timeline. They don’t belong in timeline 40 and their presence there is making time magic futz. He insists it isn’t personal (and Marina is clear that being locked in a cage is always personal).

He doesn’t listen to counter arguments and he uses his time magic to zap them all to timeline 23… except that this timeline has no magic so the cages fall and Penny punches Daniel unconscious. While he has no wish to release Marina since she is made of evilness and has just one overarching goal (be reunited with her girlfriend now she knows enough about now to actually not screw up. And though I really want to see more same-sex relationships I also kind of think this woman need to run, run for the hills!). But Penny releases her because she claims to know how to use the timeline jumping device

She’s lying. She tells Penny that she really should remember to trust his instincts about her in future. She is a terrible person.

They switch time lines but because she doesn’t know what she’s doing they end up in a time line where magic users are hunted down by law - thankfully we don’t delve into this very very tropey storyline. They decide they need advice on how to use this device and go to find this timeline’s Daniel and seek his advice. He is thrilled to see their more developed time magic and calls his mother, the founder of the Horomancy… who then collapses

Penny and Marina flee with his devices to communicate with the past and his mother’s notes and between the two they patch together some information: one of the core elements that Sonia used to develop time magic is a substance that basically causes time related brain damage - which she counters with watches that use time magic to keep their minds safe. Unfortunately Penny and Marina being outside their timeline is disrupting time magic - hence why Sonia collapsed. Her shield is no longer working

Penny realises that this is why Daniel is so eager to get them out of Timeline 40 - because their presence is killing his mother. Penny is horrified and insists that they cannot return. Marina, of course, doesn’t care. But Penny is the Traveller and the one able to zap away…

...to a white room. A room between life and death where he is pulled into a meeting but… Penny 40. Yes the Penny now working for the Library from the original Timeline - a much less fluffy, happy Penny with a whole lot more hard edges. He has a simple message - it’s vital Penny 23 return to Timeline 40: yes Sonia is going to die, but it’s too late, she’ll die anyway. Penny 40 is totally impatient by Penny 23’s emotional sadness and really really wants him to just get on with things. He insists that there’s something much much much bigger at play than just Sonia and Penny 23 must return

He also insists that this is Penny 23’s storyline now, and dismisses his guilt over taking Penny 40’s space. Again, he has no patience for this emotion - and it is really well done how these characters are very similar but fundamentally different. Often when the same actor plays two characters those characters are extremely different from each other (look at the Acting Superhero, Tatiana Maslany in Orphan Black) but it’s a brilliant change to see these characters be very similar but still have fundamental differences. Their morality and outlook is very different but they’re both recognisably the same person

Penny returns to his timeline (with Marina)  and waits for Daniel… he realises Daniel will do anything to get rid of them since his mother is on the line… soe he plants dandelion seeds from timeline 23 into timeline 40. Daniel will never find them all… getting rid of Marina and Penny won’t help him.

Thursday, February 28, 2019

Legacies: Season 1, Episode 11: We're Gonna Need a Spotlight





The school gang has decided to lay a trap for the next monster which is triggered - Alaric, Dorian and Hope respond. Yes Hope because, again, Alaric is a terrible head teacher

Inside the trap is a unicorn. Which Dorian thinks they should kill on general principles but Hope is completely against murdering the pretty horse (with the stabby addition we won’t talk about). They decide that by imprisoning it they are safe because while it’s the Malivore Monster they won’t have to deal with any more since they come one at a time

Which is a decent idea except for the creepy worm that emerges from the shiny horse

So the school is now having a talent competition. This seems to be Legacies attempt at a musical episode because all the cool shows are having them. Anyway Alaric hates the talent show and tries to use the excuse of the unicorn to cancel it - but the Honour Council overrules him. Since the monster is a magic pony he and Emma decide to bunk off school and go drinking

While Hope, who nows has a horrible worm in her brain, starts acting all happy and joyful and all lovey dovey with Landon… and how did no-one suspect mind control or possession? She’s a Mikkaelson. They don’t have happy happy joy joy - they have tantrums and brood and practice staring moodily into the middle distance.

Still everyone’s super happy with Hope being all happy and huggy, especially Landon. But not Rafael because he’s extra uncomfortable with Hope being all close and boundariless around him and being so very very extra with Landon.

Josie and Lizzie are back and Josie continues to avoid Penny while Lizzie has a novel way of trying not to be the meanest of mean girls - she has a little magically zappy bracelet that zaps her whenever she is mean so she can moderate her tone. Which she needs to because she’s super super intense about a very dull routine for the witches to win the talent contest and Josie, all head-wormed, is totally not into it, very low key and not willing to stand in the back as usual. She’s also softening towards Penny

The worm in Kaleb’s head makes him lead the vampires in a rather cool song and dance number. It’s kind of irrelevant to everything but, hey, they have it and it’s nifty.

While Hope and Landon have their own talent - cake decorating. Which is going to be super weird on stage but doesn’t get that far as Hope develops glowy green eyes and suddenly think the bestest thing in the world would be to take the Malivore urn. Landon is suspicious - and a burned cake causes and electrical shock (somehow?) well this turns out to be just what you need to de-worm yourself and Hope returns to a rather embarrassed normal. They realise they have a new monster and seek out Dorian - who is guarding the unicorn and has already killed the worm heading for him. To add to the stakes they see the unicorn die - the worm in the brain eventually kills people as well.

They do some research and Dorian is surprised that no legend talks about monsters like this - but Landon points out that mind controlling things inside people is pretty much a staple of sci-fi and maybe it’s a mistake to discount that, sci-fi has to be inspired by something. Which is another way of saying “make this character relevant!”. Anyway they decide the worm first lowers your inhibitions before convincing you to grab the malivore urn and then it kills you

By now most of the students are possessed including Raphael who decides to recite a spoken word poem about how torn and jealous he is of Landon which is totally not awkward. But thankfully everyone gets violent and urn happy so they can be locked up while everyone searches for a solution.

Wednesday, February 27, 2019

The Magicians: Season 4, Episode 5: Escape from the Happy Place





Elliot is in his dream world and yes he is still alive. He’s in the Physical Kids house, enjoying his time and memories with Todd and especially Margo - yes it’s classic “you’re locked in your happy memories prison” trope

But there’s a persistent knocking on his memory door and we’re introduced to Charlton. Charlton was the Beast’s original host (and now dead) and has a convenient source of knowledge (and being beaten up by Margot). He tells Elliot that everything but he and Elliot is a memory - but there’s a bunch of monsters around as well - monsters which were the Monster’s old hosts. Which were monsters locked in a prison which is a lot of awfulness… they’re only safe in the happy place.

Which is fine but Charlton reveals the door out of this is in Elliot’s worst possible moment which he will have suppressed

There follows an exploration of Elliot’s worst memories. Starting with the truly moving and tragic - Elliot bullied as a child and his first use of magic to kill his bully which deeply traumatised him. It was moving and painful. But no door. Then there was the him becoming the bully which was just damned annoying because the whole “homophobe bully is actually gay” trope is nauseating, homophobic, has horrendous real life implications and is generally awful.

Still no door

Step back and it’s time to try Elliot’s many many many many hilarious suppressed memories. Because happiness and self-awareness don’t go so well together and Elliot chose happiness.

Through his many many sins (all dicks and daddy issues) Elliot realises what is his biggest regret and suppressed memory - Quentin

After their epic, beautiful, 50 year relationship (which was never mentioned again AAARGH HOW?!) we finally get a scene where Quentin and Elliot discuss this - specifically Quentin pointing out they’d just had a super awesome 50 year loving relationship, they know they work together as a couple so why not go for it? Elliot objects (he’s cut off but he seems to be suggesting that Quentin is not gay or bi which… uh doesn’t seem to be the case? And I’d rather they not continue that thought because they idea that being gay or bi has no relevance to a romantic relationship with someone of the same sex is annoying and has trope implications) claiming it definitely wouldn’t work and it was always lack of choice. Except our Elliot reveals how this was all lying and Elliot was afraid and now deeply

OH MY GODS MAGICIANS! I don’t know whether to love you eternally for finally doing this scene or be so damn angry that you left it this late and until Elliot may die. Gah gah gah gah. You better remember this The Magicians, when Elliot is saved (WHEN NOT IF) and he and Quentin are back together (THEY BETTER BE) you better not play any damn “oh hey let’s be friends” moment. Elliot’s darkest, most regretted and suppressed memory is TELLING QUENTIN NO - you’ve done this now!

Tuesday, February 26, 2019

The Walking Dead: Season 9, Episode 11: Bounty




So we have the Walking Dead and it’s a tale of two storylines. One which is really interesting and desperately what i want The Walking Dead to become and the other is just dull dull dull and needs to end quickly

Sadly I think I will be disappointed

So the dull dull dull first. Alpha has arrived at the gates of the Hilltop and is demanding her daughter. They’re a relatively small crowd of several unarmed people in scary masks. People take this seriously because of Luke and Alden they have hostage. Daryl still wants to tell them to jog on (and while I appreciate the sentiment, Jesus may have died but he didn’t make you king, Daryl) but his threat to mow them all down is weakened because they have a baby.

Plenty of targets besides the baby, just saying

So they need to exchange Lydia for their two hostages, only Henry who is REALLY TRYING to make me hate him has decided to rescue Lydia and run off with her because it’s all so mean and unfair. In fact, the meme MUST exist by now





Ah, internet, thank you.


Daryl catches up with them and Lydia says how she totally misses her people in a “I’m not lying honest” way and agrees to go back. She does point out that Alpha is breaking her rules by coming for her. There’s a prisoner exchange and Henry pouts. Aldren and Luke are greeted with hugs, Alpha slaps Lydia for calling her momma.

Oh but before that the dead move in and the baby won’t stop crying despite the zombie masked mother’s attempts to quiet them. Alpha has a simple rule - the baby is quiet or they leave it for the dead - and the mother leaves the baby on the floor to be eaten. Connie, who never made it to the wall, runs out to save the baby, alerted by Luke signing, and there’s a hairy moment of running through a corn field full of zombies carrying the baby (especially hard for the Deaf Connie since the corn restricts her vision and she can’t hear the dead advancing on her) before Darryl and Kerry rescue her - and the baby.

Henry is super pissed about all this but Enid and Darryl both make the point to him that sometimes things are awful and you have to live with it. He even invokes Daryl’s own history of abuse to demand how he could send Lydia back - which is just rubbing salt in the wounds.

Henry leaves in the night to save Lydia, Daryl goes after Henry and Connie goes after Daryl because we need to centre these new characters somehow.

Ok someone has to tell me why the Whisperers are so scary. Or how they even work

I mean, when we first met them directing a herd? That was scary. In the dark, whispering? That was scary. But outside of that context they’re like a haunted house with the lights turned on

Monday, February 25, 2019

Dark Queen (Jane Yellowrock #12) by Faith Hunter




Jane, the Dark Queen, Enforce for Leo Pelessier, the Vampire ruler of the Greater South East United States is preparing for the duel that is finally here. A duel between Leo and the Emperor of the European vampires - a duel that will dictate the future of all vampire and witch kind

Assuming the visiting vampires haven’t plotted to undermine and interfere before the duel even begins

And assuming the American government doesn’t look at this gathering of the most powerful and dangerous vampires in the world and doesn’t just bomb it.

Jane has her hands full… and ow is really not the time for a man to appear claiming to be her long lost brother she never knew she had, especially when he introduces himself by shooting her


This is something of an epic finale to everything that has been happening for several books now - and the whole book is powerful tense and epic. The massive duel between Leo and the many vampires coming from Europe. We see all of his gathered entourage come out to fight, we see all the complex preparations, the betrayals, the plotting, the counter-plotting and how absolutely no-one is playing fair.

It all has an incredibly tense feel, from the very first page of the book you know some of these characters are going to die, that everything is going to change. It is maintained every second, not for one second do you forget even through side plots, even through the moments with Beast (beast is awesome, beast is best hunter and I have no idea why her writing doesn’t annoy me, but it doesn’t - I love her) that tension never leaves

Jane moves through it all and she’s amazing, powerful, competent, in control yet listening and learning from the people around her, people she genuinely loves and values. And even when she’s sat, maudling, or the fights of the actual duel are dragged out or we have a political scene which goes on and on and on for pages it all works and doesn’t feel sluggish because of that tension, power and sense of change behind everything. Thematically this book is amazing, the writing just works and the emotion doesn’t stop.

I really like Jane’s relationship with her brother. The conflict of it, the hopes mixed with the disappointment, the reactions, the conflict, the quashed ideals all are so powerful. I like the layers, I like that he has his own history and conflict, I like the legacy her example has set but I also appreciate her pain and anger over how he chose to introduce himself and how he chose to re-enter her life.  It created a fascinating complicated story. And, though I know next to nothing about Cherokee history or culture or language, there does seem to be a lot of research and effort into making these meaningful inclusion, ensuring that Jane isn’t just carrying around woo-woo from being Native American and nothing else. But i cannot speak to the accuracy of it.

Saturday, February 23, 2019

Siren: Season 2, Episode 5: Primal Instinct






So, Ben, Maddie and Ryn wake up all in bed together. Apparently they didn’t go beyond kissing because they didn’t know how far Ryn wanted to go - and Ryn is super super super interested in doing more which everyone is really happy and slightly embarrassed about.

They do belatedly realise that maybe they should discuss what sex actually means for humans and merfolk as well as sex without the aim for children. Oh and not only are merwomen violent but it is not unknown for them to kill their male lovers. So maybe some discussion first is not a bad plan

Which they kind of touch on but not really about the mechanics of sex or could Ryn please not break them with her super strength? Or hey what genitals look like for merfolk - how do they even have sex? Fish do not have sex remotely like humans do.

Instead they discuss how unequal merfolk society is and I get that they’re trying to say how bad this is while at the same time Maddie is trying to avoid being judgemental of Ryn’s culture especially since she knows so little about it - and she DOES say it is occasionally unequal on land. But wow that’s like something of a huge understatement and a lot of me cringes to see the woman of colour say “yeah it’s sometimes unequal on land” when the focus is how unequal sex in the water is. I kept expecting Maddie to just 4th wall turn to the camera and say “really”.

Also they’re talking equality and consent which is super nice but can we also talk about not breaking things with super strength oh and how sex even works.

Anyway they’re also spotted by Donna’s daughter Cami who is getting more conflicted and still really sad over her dead mother. Ryn tries to comfort her by taking her to her mother’s grave but that’s not much comfort to Cami (would merfolk even have a concept of graves?) who is completely focused on  how humans killed her mother and how angry she is about this - and how she thinks Ryn is too human

Which I get but didn’t we just have the message a few episodes ago that merfolk move on and don’t hold grudges which is why Levi and Ryn don’t really understand why Xander is still angry with them? For that matter we have Katrina running around a great big simmering body of anger and resentment? I love building an alien viewpoint and all but it has to be consistent!

Speaking of Katrina, she’s all healed up and Xander still wants to make a deal with her - either way she goes out to try and recruit the others to leave Ryn and come back to the water: which starts with Cami (after Sarge says no).

Ryn does takes the idea of equality to heart and when Helen brings a little food she insists that the male merfolk eat at the same time as the women rather than waiting as they usually do. An lo, presumably generations of cultural norms are defeated? For that matter, if merfolk culture is so female dominated and in control shouldn’t that have stood out more in season 1 when Ryn’s main point of contact was Ben? When she started communicating more wouldn’t she focus more on Maddie? I love creating alien cultures - but make them consistent!

Our journalist friend is around to tell Ben that oil company is bad and doing more badness and it’s all so very bad. Xander catches up with Ben to tell him that he’s totally onside with stopping the badness and getting rid of the mermaids and telling them all about Katrina. I think this begins with his trying to get his hands on Levi but that kind of expands to genuine concern about the evil oil company which will destroy his livelihood as well

Friday, February 22, 2019

Fianna's Awakening (Warriors of Myth and Legend #1) by Ron C Nieto





Aisling is one of the Fianna, charged with protecting Ireland from supernatural threat - even if the other Fianna are less than accepting of that

And Ronan is one of those supernatural threats - a Tuatha de Danann, exiled from Ireland by the Fianna on pain of death. But he’s back, desperately looking for the four treasures to save his people

When one of those treasures emerges, their paths are bound to cross in a mess of secrets - but while they are old enemies there may be a common enemy far darker than either



I am left with a sense of… disatisfaction. And not just because we have a book devoid of minority characters.

Looking back I can think of all the good things about the book - the concept of the setting, the Fianna, the Irish history and mythology, the hints of the Tuatha De Danann - I mean these are all things that are designed to hook me in. The writing was also really good, excellently paced with some awesomely immersive action scenes that still managed to bring in introspection. (There are authors but write tangents into their action scenes and I just picture the protagonist staring into space for 10 minutes while the fight rages around them).

And the main character, a strong capable woman without either a desperate need to go it alone nor a refusal to accept help. Who has agency without a hint of spunkiness, pushes back against sexist patronising without being ridiculous or cliched or without the situation being cartoonishly silly. Magic and fighting and fun… She is the only woman in the book which would generally be an issue but it also kind of underpins a central conflict of her character. She’s not an exceptional woman and certainly doesn’t seem to regard other women with contempt or negatively. But she’s the only female fianna surrounded by men who don’t give her the respect she is owed.

Ronan’s story, the refugee of a broken people trying to bring some hope and salvation to his people - but it’d be nice to see that more developed, explore what a Tuatha De Danaan actually is - and what a Fianna actually is. Still these are great things I definitely liked.

And yet….

And yet I’m not hooked in. Oh I can talk myself into being hooked in because I love these elements. But I feel this book maybe went too far in for plot and not enough in for world building. We introduced the concept of some of these creatures and beings but it’s brief. We get an idea of Aisling’s struggles in the Fianna and her place in it - and it’s really well presented as Aisling constantly expects behaviours from Ronan he doesn’t display. It’s woven into how she’s clearly had to live and work and it feels more natural and real because of it.

Thursday, February 21, 2019

Charmed: Season 1, Episode 12: You're Dead to Me




After a bizarre little hiatus

In fact, aside, why do American shows do this? Why? I mean I can get skipping an episode because there’s a holiday or something. But several weeks? Several? Why do you do this Americans? Whyyyy?

Anyway so after digging through various letters Macy, Maggie and Mel know the big secret of Macy’s past

So, it turns out Marisol and her husband were distraught by their dead baby daughter Macy so Marisol does the sensible thing and summons a necromancer from Tartarus - see this why she had the scythe to open Tartarus which no-one questioned. Marisol offers the freed necromancer anything in exchange for her baby coming back to life. I know I know, desperate mother and all but I lose all respect for a witch who makes bad open ended bargains like that - because really?

So after much very ominous black magic and hubby being kind of nervous, Macy is resurrected but there’s a price! The price is they can be together for 2 years after which if Marisol sees Macy, Macy will die, like Cinderella without the spinning wheels

Which… ok? I mean hey as far as sacrifices go it’s sad but the baby came back to life. I think you got off pretty easy. And also, this kind of addresses multiple episodes of angst over why Marisol never contacted Macey in a wonderful way. Hey she couldn’t or you died but she loved you so much! ANGST OVER

Angst over?

Why is this angst not over?

So Macy is now super unhappy because she’s DEAD and now ALIVE which makes her UNNATURAL and AGAINST SCIENCE.

Y’know, like telekinesis, teleportation, stopping time, reading minds and everything else you’ve been doing. The UNNATURAL AGAINST SCIEnCE train left the station several episodes ago Macy. She’s super sad so no-one can comfort her but Henry shows up to empathise because he’s also like totally dead and brought back to life. UNNATURAL AGAINST SCIENCE TWINS and it would be super hilarious if he was really offended by what she said but he’s not his all; understanding and says he understands that now you feel out of place and lacking a purpose - but how answers help

I call shenanigans. We’re milking this angst

Anyway - back to Macy in a moment since she’s the main plot line. Lucy, who is kind of awesome, invites Maggie to a Traffic Light party. Which is kind of a party where you have to colour-code your sexual availability? I dunno, it sounds like a much more boring Hanky Code for straight people. Maggie is upset because of Parker to which Lucy awesomely points out that this is not how you get over someone. Anyway, this party where no-one is allowed to look good in black will be relevant later.

Wednesday, February 20, 2019

The Walking Dead: Season 9, Episode 10: Omega




Lydia has been imprisoned in Hilltop and is now locked in a cell opposite Henry the sympathetic who wants to know her life story

She talks a lot about her life just after the apocalypse - and we get a flash back to her, her dad and her mother and them living in a shelter. In her recap, her dad was kind of an arsehole, being harsh and uncaring while her mother tried to comfort her and convince her that the world wasn’t ending while her dad was uncaring and awful and wanting to run off and generally snarling.

Lydia adds her own commentary about how her dad was the worst but her mother was strong and did what she had to - including at one point having to kill a man who was noisily panicking about being surrounded by scary zombies. Something Daryl thinks was necessary and understandable to survive since the apocalypse has you make hard choices. Later her dad ends up killed trying to save her from a zombie

This added to the lessons Lydia learned from her mother - you had to be hard, you had to be strong, and other bizarre ideas like “hunger is a gift”. She’s also convinced that settlements like this cannot possibly last becsause the world belongs to the dead and instead they have to wander around with zombies, catch blood poisoning from all the rotting meat and eat earth worms or anything lese they can just about scavenge without alerting the rotten nastiness around them

This makes perfect sense

Meanwhile Henry, listening to all this, decides it’s a great idea to tell Lydia about his parents and the other settlements in the area - until Daryl intervenes because they’re supposed to be questioning her and how can Henry possibly be this clueless? HOW?! Henry insists Lydia is a nice person and Daryl is a big ol’ mean meaning for not trusting the enemy agent who tried to kill one of them

Henry also sneaks her out in the middle of the night to eat earth worms (because that’s a thing the Whisperers do) and nearly get hit in the head by a hammer before she realises that maaaybe this settlement might actually be here to say

And Daryl confronts her - he recognises the marks on her arms as that she has been beaten - and guesses rightly that it was by her mother. As a man abused as a child himself he can see some parts of her story that don’t make sense - how her father has been cast as the villain but the story is inconsistent.

While I like Daryl examining his own past (and Henry bringing in Carol and how she cut her hair to avoid her abusive husband using it as a way to hurt her and has only grown it out now she feels safe which is a nice touch), I do think that this is somewhat simplistic - I mean “my abuse didn’t look like that” is not a valid way to criticise another’s abuse. Nor is pointing to an abuser’s acts of kindness proof that they weren’t/aren’t an abuser.

With Daryl poking a different story emerges - Lydia’s father was the supportive, caring, protective one and all the bad actions Lydia has ascribed to her dad actually came from her mother. Her mother told her her version of events over and over and over and over so many times that Lydia herself came to believe them (classic gas lighting); from simple things like cutting her hair through to the violence and willingness to leave

And, above all, her dad’s death - not at the hands of a zombie, but at the hands of Lydia when he refused to abandon their friends when they were struggling against the newly raised walker.

Again I’m going with good but simplistic here -on the one hand gaslighting like this is such a common abusive tactic - telling Lydia the beatings make her stronger, how they have to be hard and how weakness is terrible while at the same time stressing that her dad was the bad guy.

What I consider simplistic is that Lydia, after years of believing this, could apparently be turned by a couple of minutes of Daryl’s doubt.

But Lydia now recognises her mother as the big bad - which is awkward, because her mother arrives with a strong of Whispers all within easy mow-down-with-nows range to demand her daughter back

Tuesday, February 19, 2019

The Walking Dead: Season 9, Episode 9: Adaption




The new reboot continues and we have to remember Jesus is still dead, after being already only blink-and-you-miss-it gay and having his storyline vastly cut from what it was. No, I’m not amused. Oh yet Negan is alive and free. Of course he fecking is

And we have the introduction of a new enemies, a group of people in a post technology world that exist by hanging around with lots of rotting bodies. They call themselves the Whispers. I call them the Sufferers of Septicaemia. And, of course, all the settlements have turned against each other for not apparent reason, perhaps only because without The Supreme Lord Rick everything must collapse because all hail Rick.

Which means we open with Jesus’s corpse (not over this) and Michonne and Darryl doing a fighting retreat while everyone withdraws. And having to learn that fighting human led Walkers is awkward - after all a closed gate is no longer an impassable barrier

Alas we do have to catch up with Negan and he isn’t just eaten. He is lurking around being sinister and trying to escape and is found by Judith holding a gun. He tries to talk her out of shooting him - but wisely realises she is Not Bluffing. Judith is a child of the apocalypse and ruthlessness will be baked into her.

At least I would have thought so -but she still lets him go. Aaaargh really? WHY IS HE NOT DEAD?! Everyone has to agree that “You won’t shoot” “yes I will - bang” would have been awesome.

In Alexandria a whole lot of people whose names I don’t remember are being organised by Tara and Enid. And Luke, one of the new guys I guess whose name I better remember, volunteers to help to get in with the group, teaming up with Enid’s boyfriend Alden

Alden is so going to die. He’s such angst fodder. They talk music but I’m not going to pay much attention to them until I know one or more of them is going to actually live

Either way it’s all pointless because Michonne and co make it back fine anyway. On the way they run into some Walkers and Daryl has found a convenient way to tell who is actually a Walker and who is a Whisperer… shoot them in the leg and when they scream they’re a human. And about to get eaten by all their fellows

Which kind of puts a big question on how effective the Whisperers are since they have to stumble around one trip or sneeze from being eaten, they’re incapable of running or seeking cover when faced with range attacking and have to go into battle while method acting. This has flaws as a battle strategy

Exploiting this, they manage to grab a captive to drag back to Alexandria. There everyone is sad about Jesus being dead. They quickly remind us as well that they want like ALL THE VENGEANCE because they totally care about Jesus. Honest. Unlike the writers

My bitterness rises

Michonne, after bonding with Daryl over the whole dead Rick thing, decides it’s time for her to head back to Alexandria, with Aaron declaring how he’s totally agreeing with Michonne on how they should hunker down and never co-operate with their faithful friends to launch a co-ordinated response to the army threatening them

Because… reasons? Yeah that made no sense at all.

She leaves Daryl behind to question the fragile little remaining Whisperer - he intimidates her a lot in which she talks about how grim everything is, they need the dead to survive and, oh, all settlements like this fail eventually. She mentions her mother but her estimate of the numbers of Whispers are clearly lies. Also they don’t have names.