Warehouse 13, Season 4, Episode 1: A New Hope

We open with a great deal of depressing. The Warehouse is destroyed, the artefacts gone and a whole load of people are dead. Claudia, Lena, Myka, Pete and Artie all gather in grief and loss. Time for dramatic scenes, tearful memories and painful flashbacks. All of which I’m glad of – because this much loss should be accompanied by grief and pain and it needs to be impactful

Artie has the watch though, Macpherson’s watch, that may be a key to bringing something back.  But they don’t’ know what it does or what the side effects can be and, as Myka wisely says, they can’t just selfishly use an artefact to bring back the people they love without realising the consequences. Of course, blowing up the Warehouse comes with other consequences – the destruction of the Eturnium chamber, made of the world’s hardest metal, it was destroyed in the blast – and it contained Pandora’s box.

Turning on the television, they learn the world’s economy has collapsed, there’s rioting in the street and there are mass suicides. At the bottom of Pandora’s box, hope remained – and with the destruction of the box, the world lost hope.

With that established, side effects of using the watch seem pretty minor in comparison; reading that it has “push the button” written on it in Portuguese (everyone gives Myka a look for speaking Portuguese and she has a little snark moment which was really needed to counter the heavy emotion). Pushing the button, the watch became a stop watch – they have 23 hours to use whatever fail safe they have. The back of the watch has black diamonds in it – which means something to Artie – who rushes to the warehouse in characteristic “I’ll tell you later” style.

At the Warehouse, Pete catches the American football – the ball that continually travels around the world we’ve seen since season 1. It’s an Artefact tracker and, inside, is a computer and a database and the last resort they have. Between internet and rugby ball they find the Brotherhood of the Black Diamond, a sect based on the Templars based in the South of France

Lena has to join one of the Regents to find an Artefact that was in Warehouse 13 that they can use to diffuse the bomb – going back in time won’t help anything if they can’t actually stop the bomb. Claudia wants to stay and use the Metronome of immortality on Steve, she’s done the maths, even if they do save the Warehouse, they won’t be saving Steve – but if she does bring him back it will be into a world without hope; faced with that, she agrees to go with Artie, Myka and Pete. But Claudia is determined – she will save Steve after they have fixed the Warehouse

Arriving in France, the loss of hope is already affecting them – Pete isn’t flirting and everyone feels cold. And they’re already been followed by the Brotherhood, not very subtly (Pete waves at them). At their base, they split up, Claudia and Artie to steal with Pete and Myka to distract. Have they considered asking? I mean, loss of hope is probably something the Brotherhood won’t enjoy either. Distraction begins with a gay joke and the massive plan of “hit the big one” (Myka is going to murder Pete one of these days).

Blood Ties, Season 2, Episode 3: 5:55

A simple retrieval of an object for Vicki’s client – perhaps the worst businessman ever – from a seedy motel when Henry’s vampire senses start tingling. Lo, there is evil about, Vicki’s pentagrams start glowing, doors slam, maids drop trays and… big dark shadows come racing at them.

And Vicki wakes up at 5:55 (this is relevant or it wouldn’t be the title of the episode. Oh and no way that was a dream, just saying). She recounts this to Coreen, including that she died at the end of it. Then a new client, Jacob Keller, arrives and it’s the awful businessman who sends objects to complete strangers (actually, to complete stranger’s mailboxes) on the promise they’ll send him money back, from her dream. He recounts what he wants her to do – find this object (in the possession of a Benoit), just like in the dream.

Vicki starts with her investigating to find the person who owes Jacob money, or the object at least (with the most awful Southern-US accent I’ve heard outside of True Blood). At least Henry mocks her for it.

Unfortunately, when she arrives at the Benoit’s flat, he’s dead and it’s a crime scene, with Celluci and Kate already processing it. Time for some office gossip and relationship drama before Vicki tells her client that the man’s dead and his Roman glass has been stolen – he is rather perturbed since he owes people money for retrieving it and needs either payment or the glass back (yes, gape at this guy folks, he went into debt to acquire an object that he then “sold” to a complete stranger, sight unseen, sending the object to an untraceable PO Box).

Vicki has a clue where the bowl could be sold – from her dream; which is where she leads them all, pretending she saw an appointment in his flat (this would be the dream that ends up with her dying). Of course, she takes time to discuss her jealousy (hypothetical) with Henry who has just the right amount of arrogant sexy swagger about him. Back to the plot and away from the flirting – she begins to replay her dream. This time she manages to see a guy who they try to restrain, but are distracted by Keller – and he opens a box (pandora’s?) and all the dark shadows come out again…

..And Vicki wakes up in her office at 5:55. And this is when I headdesk. Yes it’s a Groundhog day plot line. Honestly, writers, this plotline was original exactly once, after that it became a sad, cheap way for you to make 10 minutes of plot cover the whole damn episode/film/whatever. Yes, I’m not a fan.

Thankfully, this convoluted groundhog day plot line is being played by Vicki Nelson – and she doesn’t tolerate such bullshit. When Keller arrives in her office this time she grabs him by his coat, slams him against a wall and demands an explanation. She rushes to try and save Benoit, but arrives too late – a sneaky janitor leaves the scene and Benoit dies after gasping “janit-“. (It’s such subtlety which impresses me about this show). Crime scene means Celluci arrives and Vicki spends her time on this third time round to talk about him and Kate – ugh, it was bad the first time.

She even feels the need to have the same conversation with Henry again while heading to the box in the motel. And this time they leave the box unattended AGAIN, and Keller opens it.

Rewind, replay. 5:55 in the office again. Yadda yadda, blah blah – they visit Benoit and catch him alive and drag him back to her office with Keller. Leaving them under vampire guard, she arranges to go to the motel with Celluci – who, of course, plays the sceptic (AAARGH what does it take to make this man believe in the supernatural?!). Only, this time Darrel Foreman, the man supposed to be selling the box is dead, murdered. They run to catch the murderous fake Janitor, get him and the box which Vicki then opens… Vicki opened it. What, was there not enough discussion about Celluci’s tie this time round?!