Warehouse 13 Sneak Peaks!

We have a preview clip of Warehouse 13's return on Monday 29th April!




 And an on set talk with the actors

Cards & Caravans (Gaslight Chronicles #5) by Cindy Spencer Pape

Connor McKay has resigned himself the fact that Wink, the woman he loved is now happily married to someone else.  He has done his best to keep busy to avoid thinking about it.  When he gets a call that Belinda Danvers has been convicted of being a witch and is about to be burned to death he decides to investigate.  After meeting Belinda, Connor quickly realises that she has little real power and seems incapable of murdering the children she has been accused of killing.  Unable to get through to authorities, Connor breaks Belinda out of jail and takes her back to his family home.  In order to keep her safe, Connor decides to marry Belinda in order to invalidate any warrant for her arrest.  All is not happy ever after however, because someone is still determined to see Belinda dead.

The reason behind the romance between Connor and Belinda is once again thin.  Connor knows her for approximately 48 hours before he proposes marriage.  His family is quick to go alone because, well, woo woo.  I don't understand why it's so damn hard to base a romance in a little bit of reality.  At 48 hours, what people have is lust, most certainly not love.   Just because this love at first woo is a staple of paranormal romance, does not make it any less irritating.  In truth, I am becoming less enamored with this series with each book that I read.

Both Nell and Belinda are women of colour.  Belinda is Romani and it has been suggested in the past that Nell is of Indian descent.  Looking at the image of Belinda on the front of the cover, she hardly looks like a woman with a dusty complexion. On this I give Cindy Spencer Pape a pass, as most authors have little to no say on the covers of their books. I do however hold her accountable for the two women being labelled as exotic.

Defiance, Season 1, Episode 3: Down in the Ground Where the Dead Men Go

We open with a mixed flashback to last episode with a Castithan who fled the battle, much to Datak’s disgust. Running through the woods he ends up in the hands of a Sensoth and another gang of Castithans.

He, Elah Bandik, is taken back to Defiance where a large crowd of Castithan gather for a formal ceremony while he is tied up. Irisa looks on from a roof top. He is accused of cowardice by Datak Tarr and he doesn’t deny it. We get some interesting insights into Castithan beliefs, with “seeming is believing” and “how I act is how my ‘liro’ [caste] is perceived.”  

Nolan, Irisa and Tommy approach and Neal tells Irisa it’s a Castithan cleansing ritual; neither of them approve. The cleansing ritual involves putting rocks in a basket which in turn stretch Elah Bandik. Nolan tries to break it up, saying he was brave to fight at all. Datak says not to the Castithan nd running from battle reflects on his entire caste; by running Elah Bandik dishonoured every Castithan in Defiance. Nolan mocks him and Datak explains the ritual and culture behind it and that without it, Elah won’t go to the afterlife after death (though he makes a cutting point that he has no duty to explain his religion to Nolan). Nolan demands it end, holding the priest at gun point and ignoring Elah’s pleas that he has to do it for his family.

Which is when Amanda arrives and Datak asks if, after being mayor for 3 weeks, she’s casting aside the Castithan had with the last mayor since Defiance was founded. Amanda responds in the Castithan language that she respects their traditions and then tells Datak to keep their ceremonies confined to the Hollows (she also objects to Datak calling her Amanda; which I’d have more respect for if she hadn’t called Datak by his first name last episode – after forgiving the attempted murder of his son).  Nolan leaves with Amanda and Tommy tries to comfort Irisa, shocking her and she puts his arm into a lock. He apologises and explains but she says she’s seen worse and he notices the scars on her wrist.

Nolan is furious with Amanda for stopping him and she gives him a history lesson – despite being one of the most numerous of the Votanis races, there are very few Irathients in Defiance. They didn’t believe in vaccinating their children and when ex-Mayor Nicky decided to force them, they held an uprising. Poorly armed, it was quickly put down and many Irathients killed, most of the rest left Defiance. After which the Town Council agreed to allow the 8 races to maintain their own traditions. Amanda declares it necessary.

Nolan goes back to Irisa and tells her he’s not going to stop it. Irisa isn’t happy

Revolution, Season One, Episode 14: The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia

Monroe learns that Neville and his wife left city and he is also informed that Jason is still alive.  Then he is told that Jason is with the rebels now. Monroe realizes Neville has been lying for awhile and he wonders what else Neville has been lying about.  He asks Neville's aid if Tom told him anything and Burke says that Neville told him nothing. Monroe asks Burke how he can trust him and how he knows he won't betray him to. Burke stands and says that Tom is a traitor and that he is loyal to Monroe. Monroe turns and shoots the man dead in his office and then drops the gun on the desk.

At rebel camp, a bloodied man pulls in.  He reaches into his pocket to hand over a message and then promptly drops dead.  Miles says that four of their spies died getting there. It seems that Monroe sent the nuke to Atlanta and Miles believes that Monroe is crazy enough to use it. Miles tells Charlie and Nora to pack their crap.

Nora cuts the wires to enter the Georgia Federation and Miles and Charlie follow. Charlie pauses to says she has never left the Monroe Republic and Miles calls her a hick. Georgia has steam engines for transportation and Miles says that it's a different life there and that due to the weather they're rich Miles adds that Gerogia has even started trading with Europe.  When they get to a house, they send Charlie into batt her eyelashes and then kill the man who answers.  When they burst in after no answers, they find the residents all dead from a head shot and Miles believes Monroe's guys did this.  Nora says they had the same idea because all of the spare uniforms are gone. Miles propses to steal the uniforms from the dead bodies.  Miles finds a familliar knife on the table and says that its his and that Alec was there and killed these people.  Nora replies that he doesn't know that but Miles says that he made the same move he would have.  Miles walks out in frustration and Charlie asks Nora who Alec is.

We get a flash to 7 years after the blackout.  Miles is sitting in a bar with Alec holding his knife.  He says that the knife came from his grandfather who carved the handle himself.  It became a good luck charm because both his grandfather and father returned home from two wars with the knife. Miles gives the knife to Alec and tells him to make sure he always comes back alive.  Alec says he doesn't want it but Miles replies "maybe one day your son will."

Aaron and Rachel are still looking for Jean and Rachel warns Aaron not to set her off or make eye contact.  They are stopped by a man who says that there is a toll on the road.  They push Aaron aside and grab Rachel.  All of a sudden, one soldier starts to smoke and burn and the ground they are standing on turns to ash.  Aaron and Rachel move away quickly, as the two men fall to the ground, completely burned to ash.  A woman comes out of the bushes and it turns out that it's Jean. Jean asks what she is doing there and Rachel replies that she came to see her.  Aaron wants to know about the magically charred bodies and Jean says that it's not magic but it must be what God feels like. Jean invites them back to the house for sandwiches.

Miles, Charlie and Nora are in uniform and he says that Alec is going to cause as much bloodshed as he can.  Miles hands out flashlight so they can track down Alec, the chip will power anything near by.  Miles finds a bag down a grate and is attacked from behind by Alec. Alec asks if Miles got his message and Miles pulls out his knife. Miles starts to apologize, when Alec says that the knife wasn't so lucky for him. The two start to sword fight and Charlie shoots Alec with an arrow. Mile sends Charlie after Alec, when he goes running with the nuke. After a minute, Miles joins the chase.  When they lose Alec in a crowd they split up.  Miles spots Alec and gives chase until Alec grabs a cop and shoots him in the back. The cop collapses in Miles' arms, as Alec take off running.  Before Miles can leave, the Georgia police show up and put Miles under arrest.

Miles is ecorted to a holding area with Charlie and Nora following right behind, fearing that the won't find Alec or the bomb without Miles.

Incubus Dreams (Anita Blake #12) by Laurell K Hamilton

I start most reviews with a recap. That would require there to be plot for me to recap. Ok fine, I’ll try:

Anita gains new woo-woo (lots of sex is needed)

Relationship angst

Strippers are murdered, people manage to care about that at the end of the book.

There, done.

It never ceases to amaze me how a book can go on for so long before anything relevant happens – and there can be no greater example of this than Incubus Dreams which also sets a pattern for most of the later Anita Blake books: beyond the sex, angst, relationships issues and random new super powers Anita pulls out of her vagina every book (or including them all) is the simple irrelevancy.

This book begins with Larry and Tammy’s wedding. Now, you would be forgiven for forgetting these characters since they’ve hardly been mentioned for several books and certainly not played any significant role since... well, Larry not since Burnt Offerings I think. And nor will they in the next 9 books. Why are they here? Why are we devoting so much page space to a pair of characters who have been virtually dropped from the series?

It’s not like these moments are supposed to show Anita’s mundane life as we saw in earlier books (when she actually worked and helped in police cases rather than spending her whole time with her harem), or if it’s supposed to be, it does it extremely poorly because this ISN’T her daily life – spending time with these people is a one off out of her daily life of harem-management. It is an irrelevant distraction from who Anita is, what matters to her and what she does – and the whole thing was just used as a vehicle to describe Anita’s relationship with Nathaniel anyway, with only a brief consideration of the bride and groom.

Then there’s Ronnie and her issues – again, taking up pages and pages from a character who has all-but been dropped from the series and ends up being, yet again, another vehicle to talk about Anita’s issues.

Continuum, Season Two, Episode One

Kiera dreams that she is on a stretcher.  She manages to roll off the stretcher and escape briefly but is quickly recaptured.  This time she is drugged and placed in a glass cage.  She screams to be let out and awakens in the future with her husband  and complained that it feels like something went wrong with her CMR.

Sonya still has her gun pointed at Travis, who is trying to buy time now that she has announced that Kagame wanted her to be his successor. Travis tells her that she has proved her loyalty but has clearly not thought about what that loyalty means. Travis says that he knows her better than Kagame but Sonya shoots him several times and even reloads to shoot again when he is interrupted by orderly and is forced to flea.  Travis is taken to emergency where doctors attempt to save him.  After not getting a heart beat, they call it quits but Travis' own body shocks him into alertness and he regains consciousness, escapes the operating room, only to be taken down by the cops and a doctor with a tranquilizer, as he calls out for Sonya.

A group tries to break into a factory but they are attacked by an invisible force.  After they are defeated, Kiera makes an appearance and tells the security guard that he saw nothing and to run.  Alex is in the process of moving and Kiera calls but he does not answer the phone.

Kiera is in a bar and Kellog meets here there. Kellog lets Kiera know that though he took her in after the explosion, she simply disappeared. Kellog asks why he is there and Kiera asks what's next now that Kagame accomplished his mission, Travis is captured and Sonya is in control.  Kellog says that its going to take time to infiltrate the criminal world, the business, world and the political world. He then asks Kiera why else he is there and she tells him that she needs money. Kiera points out that she could have had Kellog arrested but he is alive and free. Kiera admits that she wants to go back to her family and for the future to unfold as it should and Kellog asks how she knows that the future has not changed.

The mayor heads to a small press conference to talk about what the police are doing with Liber8.  She only has enough time to begin her statement before she is shot by a sniper through the head. Inspector Dillon is in his office on the phone when Carlos enters and hands him a folder.  Dillon says that the chief of Police was just asked for his resignation and that the city manager is going to be running thing until they can arrange for a quick election, now that the mayor is dead.  Dillon tells Carlos to get the person who assassinated the mayor quickly, before they're both looking for new jobs.  When Carlos goes to leave the room, Dillon asks about Kiera and says that the whole business smacks of Liber8. Carlos leaves saying that he will see what he can do.

Kiera approaches Carlos, who is waiting for her by a car. He tells her that she needs to drop the superhero act and get back in the game, but Kiera replies that she better operating outside the confines of the police department. Carlos asks if better she means what she did the other night. Kiera argues back that if she hadn't done what she did that the entire electrical grid would have been brought down.  This does not convince Carlos and tells her that Dillon is calling however pulled that stunt a vigilante.  Carlos adds that Dillon is under a lot of pressure and that he will do whatever he has to, to keep his job. Kiera says that she is going to need access to the mayor's assassination files, photos, videos, and to the crime scene.  Carlos agrees and Kiera asks if the mayor was in the pocket of the corporations and Carlos asks what politician isn't.  Kiera agrees to help.

Jasmine searches the internet and tells Sonya that Travis is alive and is in recovery at a prison infirmary with gunshot wounds and broken ribs.  Sonya is clearly surprised and Jasmine adds that they need to organize a rescue. Sonya recovers quickly and reminds Jasmine that the mayor was just assassinated, therefore the last thing they need is to open up more wounds.  Sonya then asks about the cells they have left and Lucas says that they have half a dozen left.  Sonya orders them shut down until the dust settles but Jasmine suggests that this should wait until after they rescue Travis.  Sonya turns and says, "I don't think you heard me."  Jasmine does not given in and says that they don't leave soldiers behind and asks who Sonya is to be giving orders.  Sonya reminds Jasmine that Travis got himself shot and captured, thus making her ranking officer. Sonya orders Lucas to get her all the intel he can on Tavis' security, when Jasmin leaves the room.

Carlos has taken Kiera to the area where the mayor was shot.  She uses her tech to analyze the scene and then tells him to to get her access to the case files and she will deliver the shooter.  Carlos tells her that she seems optimistic and Kiera replies, "any excuse to see an old friend," then she walks away.

Alec is looking for a job at an electrical store.

Agent Gardiner is in Dillon's office and says that he is looking for Kiera. Agent Gardiner asks Dillon to let him know when he makes contact with Kiera. Dillon says that Gardiner should tell him why he is looking for Kiera and then maybe he will tell him if he finds her. Gardiner tells Dillon that he does not want to mess with him but Dillon counters that it is his boss and his agency that he doesn't want to mess with but if Gardiner makes it personal that he will mess with him all day long.  Gardiner tells him that he is going to have to do better than this before walking out of the office.

Carlos goes to see Betty and tells her that he is going to need all of the footage from the mayor's assassination.  Betty tells him that she doesn't understand what he is up but promises to dump it on a device for him after he says he cannot explain what he is doing.

Once Upon a Time, Season 2, Episode 19: Lacey

It’s Henry’s birthday! That means all his family are gathered around a cake

(NB: for family we’re using the Once Upon a Time definition – which means people who donated DNA and were completely missing for your entire life, rather than people who loved you, cared for you, spent your entire life raising you and are your legal parents and guardians.)

For his present he gets to pick one object from Gold’s shop. Yeah… that cannot be a good idea. He picks up a glass wand. Well at least it’s fragile. Gold uses the wand to turn Henry into pottery then shatter him – for the sake of the prophecy

He then wakes up. Yes, Gold woke up, it was a nightmare. Because he’s just THAT attached to Henry that killing him is a nightmare.

Gold watches Neal play swords with Henry, looking kind of angsty and Regina joins him asking why Neal and Henry are together. Of course, no-one has told Regina that Henry’s father has shown up. Which means Gold gets to tell Regina that he’s Henry’s grandfather. Regina is furious and doesn’t believe that Gold couldn’t have known this before procuring Henry for adoption – Gold puts it down to Fate. Regina tells Gold they won’t accept him, none of them will – she’s seen his dark heart and there’s no way he will play good well enough to be accepted

Gold goes from theatre to visit Belle who is a little surprised that Gold is alive given his dramatic and beautiful death bed phone call. Belle also accepts that since his feelings were true that they did have a past together. He agrees to do everything he can to help her remember herself – adding that she always brought the best out in him and he needs that.

Let’s have a fairyland flashback – to Belle and Rumplestiltskin and Rumple being very very annoyed Belle’s piteous crying all night because she misses her family. When they’re interrupted by Robin Hood looking to steal stuff. He has a magic arrow that cannot miss so even Rumple’s super magic speed doesn’t let him dodge. Of course, when it hits him it doesn’t actually do anything – nice try, Robin.

Back to Storybrooke and Regina is stirring the pot, going to see Belle, being nice and wishing her well – and giving her something; a matchbook. Belle stares at it and says she remembers who she is. Regina’s smile foretells bad things for Gold.

Tamara and Gregg are still plotting, I think as much to remind us who they are as much as anything given the hiatus. And Tamara is bringing in a package – and Greg asks if it’s “stable”. That’s not good. Things that may become unstable are never good.

Game of Thrones, Season 2, Episode 4: And Now His Watch is Ended

  As ever, because there are a gazillion and one characters in this show, HBO has an excellent guide to remind you of who is who that can be found here.

On the Road: Brienne & Jaime

Jaime isn’t a happy chappy, what with having his hand cut off and now being made to carry it. The mockery of everyone around him is probably less painful than the blood loss and infection (everything in Game of Thrones is dirty after all). Brienne is the only one who has any concern for him. He falls of his horse and they continue to torment him until he gets his hand on a sword.

Dear people who are holding Jaime Lannister captive. He is renowned as one of the top swordsmen in the realm – can you please be keeping swords away from him. This is becoming an embarrassing habit.

Of course, outnumbered, one handed, likely infected, thirsty and not very-well-at-all he doesn’t do very well; though Brienne jumps from her horse with her hands tied and does better. The fighting ends very quickly and Jaime is warned not to do it again or he loses his other hand.

As they travel, Brienne becomes more and more worried about Jaime. At night when they stop to camp Brienne heckles and attacks Jaime for giving up and trying to die, berates him as a coward for losing one thing. Jaime protests that it’s his sword hand – who he was. Brienne sneers – this is the real world, where people have real things, important things, taken from them. Having heckled him to eat she also says she knows what Jaime said to the guards to stop them raping her. Tarth is the sapphire isle because of the blue of the water – not gemstones.

Kings Landing: Lotsa people plotting.

Tyrion has a meeting with Varys, concentrating so much cunning in one room that the whole kingdom should beware. Tyrion wants to know what happened at the Blackwater – when one of his men tried to kill him; he thinks it was his sister and wants proof. Varys scoffs a little at the idea of their being a trial and says he only has whispers. Instead Varys tells Tyrion how he was castrated, a story he had been planning to tell him for a while. In the Free City of Myr he was sold to a man who castrated him to use his genitals for black magic, putting them into a fire – and a voice from the fire spoke to the sorcerer.

This is why he helped against Stannis and the sorceress Red Priestess Mellisandre because he hates magic – symbolic revenge. Tyrion wants actual revenge against the actual person who actually tried to kill him. For that he needs influence which he doesn’t have. Varys points out that influence takes patience – as he, thrown out of the sorcerer’s house to die slowly worked his way up from the slums to the Council Chamber. And with his slowly growing influence he reached where he is today - he opens a large crate and inside is the sorcerer, still alive, with his mouth sewn shut.

Let it be known that one does not screw with Varys. Ever.

Later, Varys has a council with Roz about Pod’s surprising prowess confirming that, yes, the 3 prostitutes did give their services for free because Pod was just that skilled. Before talking about Baelish and his probably plans to sneak Sansa to the Vale with him.

Meanwhile Joffrey, Margaery, Olenna and Cersei are taking a tour of the holy place in preparation for Joffrey’s marriage with Cersei and Olenna discussing class divides rather cynically and Joffrey relishing in the horrible ways people in the past died and were buried. Such a nice young man. Margaery continues to gently manipulate Joffrey while Olenna works on Cersei with her harsh criticism of her own son and forming common ground of motherhood, trying to keep their sons from battle and dying. Cersei laments that men – with little sense and a seeming longing for death – rule the world and Olenna openly calls the arrangement foolish.

When the crowd starts to get loud outside, Margaery convinces Joffrey to go see them. Outside the crowds are cheering and celebrating – calling both Joffrey and Margaery’s name. Oh, she’s good.

Cersei goes to see Tywin and, after the obligatory forced wait for his power playing, she wants Tywin to get Jaime back. Tywin is quite dismissive of her request – he already started a war to get Tyrion back from Catelyn and he hated Tyrion so it’s obvious he’s already doing what he can for Jaime. But she hangs around to vent annoyance about being kept in the dark – and maybe she, his daughter, is the child most worthy of his trust and respect; that she may have more to contribute to his “legacy” than his sons. He invites her counsel and she warns him that the Tyrells are a threat, that Margaery can manipulate Joffrey. Tywin thinks that’s a good since Cersei obviously can’t and Joffrey’s unchecked proclivities have caused chaos. He adds that he didn’t dismiss Cersei because she’s a woman but because she’s not nearly as clever as she thinks she is. Cersei invites Tywin to try controlling Joffrey