Monday, June 6, 2011

Sherrilyn Kenyon - Fantasy Lover: Book 1 of the Dark Hunter World

Oh dear gods this BOOK. I have no idea what was being smoked when it was recommended to me but it should have been shared with me!

The plot is similar to Marjorie Liu’s first book with her enslaved weretiger. We have an ancient Greek (from Sparta and Macedon) demi-god who has been bound into a book for all eternity to be summoned out every few decades to be used for a month by a new master - only this case it’s as a sex slave (and ‘master’ is always ‘mistress’)

Ok, Julian the Fuckmuppet (the two main characters in this book aren’t characters. They need characterisations to be actual characters. Instead they have 1 tragic back story each, some angst from said backstory, then an eternal desire to hump. They are, therefore, not characters and I dub them Fuckmuppets) has been summoned from the book by Grace Alexander, because her friend gave her the book and cast a spell (her friend is a gypsie. So has woo-woo of course). Julian is summoned, the Greek god (the blond, blue eyed Greek god. So he’s Greek god by way of Norway or something) because Gypsy Selena thinks Grace needs a booty call (get ye to a bar, get a pitcher or 2. Seriously, much easier).

There is much lusting and angsting. We learn Julian’s tragic past is that he was raised as a Spartan, among lots of Spartans, and how terribad it was for him, and lots of stuff about being an outcast because his parents hated him and he had nothing to inherit (personal wealth really mattering in, y’know, Sparta. Which gave us the term “spartan” to mean “austere”). This Sparta is also extremely heterosexist and they even use homophobic insults (in ancient Greece. Yeah.) which is the closest they’ve got to a GBLT character (WITH ANCIENT GREECE FLASHBACKS! Flashbacks to the all male Spartan military barracks no less!)

Anyway, because of his tragic past he, well, did something severely evil, frankly. I won’t spoil it with the details, but I’d be inclined to curse him as well – and not to get his horn on multiple times over the centuries. Anyway, bad naughtiness got himself epicly cursed (as is the way of those who piss of the Greek gods) and he spends a lot of time snarling and hating on the guy who cursed him, the guy who HELPED HIM DO THE EVIL THING, and his mother for not intervening when he is cursed for said evil thing. I, frankly, am side-eyeing this guy so much.

Anyway, we’re now looking to beat the curse. The way they’re going to do it is… pretty nasty as well. But those elements have been hastily swept under the rug because there needs to be more room for humping, angsting and cursing the gods because Julian was an evil bastard.

Oh, Grace, the female Fuckmuppet, is a 29 year old sex therapist who has had 1 awful, angst filled sexual encounter, no relationships, has never had an orgasm and is deeply wary of all men. Yeah. She might want not to include all that on her CV, I’m just saying.

I like the inclusion of the Greek gods. Especially Eros, I always have a soft spot for Eros/Cupid (and not just because he was hot on Xena. Ok, mainly because he was hot on Xena. Nomnomnom, bring that arrow this way, blondie. *ahem* where was I?) I like the Greek pantheon - but, yeah, so far this is it. 50% in and all we have is “we want to hump!” “I’m cursed and sad” “I have sad past” “me too” “stillll hooorny” “let us have more foreplay!” “horny” “angsty” “horny” “angsty”

Nothing has happened except different levels of exposition. No plot no real action. It is… tiresome. The series is called the Dark Hunter series. I assume they’re hunting for the plot. And it’s dark… so they have lost it. Yes, this book has lost the plot.

Because the books came highly recommended I’m going to give it and the series more time. But that doesn’t mean I will do so without snark or complaint :P

EDIT TO ADD: After actually finishing this book, I'm beyond frustrated. The plot never actually appeared - there wasn't any. The world wasn't developed. Nothing happened. He was cursed, he met Grace, they had sex, the curse was broken. Fairy tales have more plot twists than that. It avoids 0.5 fangs simply because it didn't make me scream with horror - but there was absolutely nothing there.

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