Monday, November 12, 2018

Legacies, Season 1, Episode 3: We're Being Punked, Pedro

We have a special scary knife which Alaric is studying in detail to see why it’s so special, which means reading lots of ancient French and us getting a flashback over a gargoyle killing a couple of ancient witches who tried to steal the fancy knife. Which seems pretty resistant to fiery magic.

He has also decided to punish his brawling high school students who have drawn attention to themselves by sending them into the town under the eyes of his chief librarian Dorian to do community service. Because mixing your volatile supernatural kids with hostile and volatile towny kids is just such a great idea. Lizzie protests that she was provoked (true) and then breaks and totally throws her sister under the bus blaming her. Bad twin etiquette!

Hope is angry that she isn’t being allowed to stay with Alaric to research the dagger - but Alaric dismisses her, let the adults handle it (her and Dorian the Librarian) and Hope is angry about this because he wasn’t saying this when he called her in to use her magic to fight the dragon last episode. Again, this is the problem with Alaric running the school - I’ve said this repeatedly even as this series was proposed - a completely human Alaric does not have the tools to handle the problems that can arise with this school. Instead he uses his students - Hope and MG - to be tools in his tool box to fix whatever problems he has. Which is both inappropriate, exploitative and means Hope has a very real point. It also really undermines his authority - a headmaster cannot run a school when he relies on his students to handle major structural procedures of that school

Also he needs Dorian to do research but has just sent him to monitor students doing community services in the nearby town probably without a great deal of relevant reading material. Alaric’s decision making is… pretty much consistent with everyone else in this world.

They go for litter picking and graffiti cleaning and lots of snarling. Lizzie is shunned by Josie, has many issues with Hope and then gets into a nasty milkshake accident with one of the locals. She storms back to the school in a rage.

Josie and Hope are pretty much together after a rockys start - Josie points out that Hope is continually poking them and picking fights and how this isn’t going down well especially since she’s already keeping secrets with Alaric - and Alaric is spending more time and attention on Hope than he is with his own daughters. They have issues, she’s clear which Hope kind of concedes, especially after Hope accidentally impales her own foot and Josie helps and Hope reveals that she didn’t tell Alaric that Josie helped her with the naughty black magic. Also Hope pushes Josie to make a play for Rafael because she shouldn’t always defer to her twin

Meanwhile MG makes out with a local towny girl before compelling her to find out why and discovering that she’s only doing it to make another guy jealous - but since he’s doing the same thing for Lizzie, he recognises that he can’t be angry and also that continuing to make out with her knowing the underlying motives is kind of exploitive. He compels her to forget making out with him (so if anyone talks about it to her later she looks like she’s suffering from weird amnesia) but also remember he’s awesome (he’s a teenager. Apparently. Maybe. He’s a vampire so who even knows). But later he finds fellow vampire Caleb is also compelling that girl so he can feed off her… and he agrees to keep his secret when he appeals to friend and fellow vampire (and possibly fellow Black man). He also has some disturbing ideas on the superiority of supernatural beings over humans

Lizzie returns to the school, she curses out her father with Emily, the therapist, apparently believing it’s appropriate as a professional to get involved in this family discussion uninvited. Lizzie blames everything on Alaric’s absence as a dad and how he is more focused on Hope than his own daughters. Which… is…. Not wrong

She ends up looking after the small children and is attacked by the ominous gargoyle statue. This statue has been moving around this magical campus for a while and absolutely no-one notices this except a 6 year old. HOW?!

Lizzie takes the child to safety and tries to use magic on the gargoyle and ends up clawed by it - and slowly turning to stone.

The school goes into lockdown, with Emily protecting all the small children by hiding behind an invisibility spell while Alaric tries to lead the Gargoyle away with the knife it’s after. Which doesn’t really work, the gargoyle catches Alaric, knock him out and takes the knife. It tries to leave with this knife except that spell Lizzie cast was a containment spell to stop the Gargoyle running amok in the region. It’s now trapped in the school

This spell is broken when Josie and Hope return to the school because Josie feels psychic twin pain from Lizzie being clawed. They also have a convenient gargoyle book to pass on  which advises that to kill a gargoyle you have to hit it until it stops moving so they set off with medieval weapons

Why? Why 2 witches and a human? Are Caleb and MG the only vampires on campus? Because when fighting a magic resistant creature that needs smashing to death in melee, the super strong, super fast, nearly-impossible-to-kill beings may the best ones to unleash.

The gargoyle attacks, nearly stabs Hope but Alaric stands in the way and the Gargoyle pauses before stabbing him in the face. Josie and Hope then use magic to make it explode. Which is a victory - but Josie is outraged that her dad was willing to die for Hope, willing to throw away his life for her while he has two living daughters. He tries to protest that his research suggested gargoyles, as protectors, love humans and wouldn’t kill them and would only harm supernatural creatures it views as evil. Hope thinks this is unlikely to convince anyone (especially given that’s a huge logical leap) and makes a pretty speech about how everyone totally has to stop keeping secrets if they’re going to stand together. A sentiment Alaric echoes in a pretty speech to the whole school

Can I say again how this kind of undermines Alaric as a headmaster and his faculty. Because in most schools? Headmasters and teachers keep things secret from students. Because they don’t rely on the students to run the damn school!

He also keeps the knife in school despite the fact two magical creatures have just been willing to kill to obtain it. This sounds like the sort of thing you, say, call Marcel and Rebekkah and have them take care of.

And time to catch up with Landon and Rafael. They ran away together because Rafael is loyal to his human friends and are now eating rabbit in the woods (how they know how to hunt rabbits, I don’t know?). Landon is still mooning after Hope and still can’t explain why he stole the knife and lied about it

They don’t like eating rabbit so decide to place bets on Rafael being able to do physically near impossible feats in order to win bets. This means clearly displaying his supernatural nature to lots of nice people with camera equipped, internet connected mobile phones

Everyone on this show makes terrible terrible terrible decisions

Oh and this means werewolves have super physical abilities even when not in wolf form or not on a full moon which may be new or not because this show continually plays fast and loose with everyone’s abilities

Someone sends them a menacing note about how the wolfboy better run and Landon thinks it is totally a good idea to hide from Rafael. Everyone on this show makes terrible decisions. Everyone.

They’re attacked by a hunter (how shocking!) and they’re just lucky it wasn’t a vampire (hey, remember when werewolves were near extinct because vampires hunted them down? No. It was back in Vampire Diaries days and has been largely forgotten since them). He is rescued by Jeremy!

Yes, that Jeremy. Jeremy Gilbert. If I were a petty, cruel man I would say that Legacies may be becoming a dumping ground for all the Vampire Diaries actors who didn’t do a great job relaunching their careers after being written off that show *cough*Matt*cough*

I never claimed not to be a petty man.

Honestly I can’t even remember if Jeremy is supernatural or not any more? Is he a hunter, a ghost, a zombie a mummy? I don’t even know. Anyway he works for Alaric now because he has qualifications. Apparently

Landon apologises for lying to Rafael, again, and thinks Rafael should go to school since it’s so good for him. Rafael insists that Landon should come with him as well, kind of forgetting Landon didn’t leave for fun, but because he was kicked out

And did anyone ever get to the bottom of why he’s immune to compulsion?