Thursday, March 3, 2016

Shadowhunters: Mortal Instruments Series, Episode Eight: Bad Blood


After all the running around, the shadowhunters finally have the Mortal Cup inside of the institute. Alec wants to hand it over to the clave but Clary is insistent that they cannot do this because it's the only leverage they have over Valentine, who is holding her mother hostage. Alec locks the Mortal Cup away for now but makes it clear to Clary that this is no way means that they are friends.  I wish that they would stop having Alec come across like a jealous ex girlfriend, even if this is the tone the books took.

The alarms go off at the institute and Izzy, Jace, Clary and Alec head outside to find out what set off the wards, they find Raphael holding what appears to be an unconscious Simon. Clary is absolutely pissed and blames Raphael for what happened to Simon, completely ignoring that she has spent the last little while blowing Simon off though he called her repeatedly for help.  They don't have time for Clary's angst and guilt however because a choice has to be made. Simon either has to be staked to let his soul free or they have to turn him into a vampire.  Jace rightfully finds the idea of Simon as a vampire ridiculous and Clary starts to cry.

Lydia Branwell walks into the institute disguised as Valentine. Alec shoots off an arrow very quickly and Lydia catches it and transforms into herself, snarking about the slow response time from the rest of the shadowhunters. Lydia is the representative the Clave sent to see exactly what the Lightwoods have been up to. There's no love between Maryse and and Lydia though their families have a very long history. When Lydia learns that there's been an attack at the werewolf headquarters she decides to check it out with Alec.

Clary has a decision to make about what to do with Simon and so she heads to his home to speak to his mother.  Elaine is all distraught about her missing son, and she questions if Clary knows where Simon is.  What Elaine doesn't know is that Jace is in the room and he's used a rune to make himself invisible.  When Clary starts to hedge and it looks like she is going to reveal how the world really works to Elaine, Jace drops a carved wooden monkey which was a mother's day gift from Simon on the floor.  When Eliane walks over to pick up the carving, Jace questions what Clary is doing and tells her to be careful.  Umm did anyone see them use a silence rune? If not, how is it that Elaine didn't hear at least Clary's side of the conversation?

Clary heads to Simon's room to collect things that he's going to need for a transition.  Jace decides to tell her a story about his childhood. It seems that as a child, Jace's father gave him a falcon to tame. Jace worked with the falcon on a daily basis even though it often drew blood until the falcon trusted him and performed at his command. Jace then took the falcon to his father, who promptly snapped the birds neck. Jace says that he was told to tame the bird and not love it. Jace tells Clary that as a Shadowhunter, she has to learn to think with her head and not her heart and that is what his father taught him by snapping the bird's neck. Clary however is certain that if that is what being a Shadowhunter is all about, she's not interested.  Since Clary doesn't make a habit of thinking with her brain anyway, it wouldn't have worked.

On the way to meet with the werewolves, Lydia gets her flirt on with Alec, saying that she knows why so many girls are into him.  Alec tactfully ignores this comment. Lydia then reveals that she was going to run the Lisbon institute with her fiancee but he was killed. Lydia then suggests that Alec avoid love.  Everyone is filled with happy stories this episode it seems.

Inside the restaurant that the werewolves use as their headquarters, Lydia and Alec find Luke. It seems that the werewolves were attacked by something called a Forsaken.  They are all certain that this is the work of none other than Valentine.  Luke is certain that this attack is personal and suggests that he might be going after former circle members. Lydia then has a big revelation for Alec - his parents are former members of the circle.  She pretends like she is shocked that he didn't know but it's quite obvious that Lydia was aware of Alec's ignorance.  Lydia does however promise extra protection for the former circle members.

Staked (Iron Druid Chronicles #8) by Kevin Hearne



Atticus continues his lethal war against the vampires – old enemies of the druids who had nearly succeeded in wiping out druidry 2000 years ago. Now Owen is opening his own school for new druids, it’s time to fight the vampires to a new peace – or extinction.

Owen and Granuaile have issues of their own, Owen building his school while Granuaile pursues her long festering family issues as well as continuing to fight against Loki’s scheming as they’ve all been dragged into the fight for Ragnorak.



This is a book with three different protagonists – Atticus, Granuaile and Owen – and I like how all their stories are connected but they all have their own plot lines and own goals. I was surprised by this because, when Granuaile first became a druid I suspected she would become a sidekick for Atticus. A kind of two legged Oberon to follow Atticus around, be sexy and be in awe of his power. Yes, I’m cynical, but I expected that

Instead we have all three of them leading their own lives and their own agendas – each of which says so much about the characters, their view points and experiences

Atticus is interesting in that he is the oldest and most powerful of all three of them – yet at the same time the one with the least plans and even the least freedom. He has spent two thousand years hiding from Aenghus Og, making enemies and collecting baggage – since killing Aenghus Og Atticus has earned so many debts, so many favours and launched on so many crusades (including the whole Norse Ragnorak issue and the current war against the vampires) that he can’t even begin to make plans for the future. When Granuaile comes to him with her environmental aims he not only doesn’t understand her (given he’s from a very different time and is far more focused on supernatural threats than human defilement of the world) but because simply having space to do something he chooses seems pretty alien to the way he’s living and has lived for two millennia. Even now with Fand out there he is, again, under threat. Atticus is a man under siege, often having to make bad decisions to try and solve the problem in front of him, fully expecting it to come back and bite him but not seeing another choice. It’s interesting how Atticus can be such a light, happy character yet have this rather bleak undercurrent.

While Granuaile is very energetic and passionate and driven – but also very personally invested. In some ways she’s much more connected to the modern world than Atticus or Owen – she’s also relatively young and still growing into her life and role. She still has issues with her step father and his callous polluting of the world which is very emotional and personal for her, which involves a lot of growth, missteps and learning – in fact I think a lot of her story this book is Granuaile deciding what she’s going to do with her life and how that doesn’t involve Atticus. It’s not that she’s breaking from Atticus, they still care for each other and spend time together – but all of Granuaile’s plans and growth are her own: her own battle against Loki, her own deal with the witches, her own plan for the future, even picking her next language to learn (druids have to learn languages for different head spaces) all separate from what Atticus suggests or would do.

Teen Wolf, Season 5, Episode 19: The Beast of Beacon Hills



Corey takes Mason into hiding – this lasts about 5 minutes before he fails epicly (because he’s Corey and utterly useless in every way possible and can’t even hide even with an invisibility power). This ends up with Mason kidnapped by the Dread Doctors.

Naturally Scott & co start searching however they can. We get a completely-non-aware moment when Corey describes that we should totally have known that Mason was the Beast because the way he was dumped into the plot box every time action happened. Because this show has absolutely no idea how often it’s rammed gay and Black characters into the plot box.

By this logic, the unexplained absent Danny is actually an Archdemon or Lucifer or maybe Unicron.

But Theo and the gang also wants in on the action, being deftly manipulated and taunted by Deucalion who cleverly pokes Theo into absorbing the power of Josh, his zappy chimera, to use the dread mask and join the search (actually this turns out to be pretty useless as the mask only reveals what we all learned from last week’s Argent Storytime). Oh, and reveals that he was able to leave at any time because he’s Deucalion and Theo is an entitled teenager with a mopey streak who doesn’t know nearly as much as he thinks he does.

Despite absolutely no-one trusting Theo they all decide to trust Theo and the complete lack of any kind of knowledge, skills or utility he brings. Oh, he reveals that the Dread Doctors are tapping a preserved Nazi Alpha werewolf for immortality juice (I could have happily lived in a world where I didn’t have to type that sentence). Using the help of everyone but Theo (remind me again why he’s here?) they manage to find said undead alpha nazi werewolf (this sentence doesn’t get better typed a second time) and he is plugged into Mason via a tube into his neck which is unpleasant

We do get a use for Theo – like Deucalion the Dread Doctor’s just can’t resist taunting him by how useless and mundane and dull and a failure he is – not even a special evil (special evil turns from true good) until he sees to give up all of his plans and just launch himself at the Dread Doctors, along with Liam equally failing to do anything.

Except antagonist Mason into enduring agony and possible death to rip himself free of the Nazi alpha zombie werewolf (third time. No better) and transform. Without frequencies – he has made the final transformation into the Beast. The Dread Doctors consider this a victory… despite the Beast’s first action to squish all three doctors as easily as swatting flies (what exactly is their plan? Surely not elaborate suicide?)

On the plus side this saves Scott, on the minus side it also saves Liam and Theo. And it may result in Mason being lost.

Wednesday, March 2, 2016

Shadowhunters: The Mortal Instruments, Season One, Episode Seven: Major Arcana


So, Clary now knows that her mother hid the Mortal Cup inside the tarot cards. But where are they? Not to worry folks, it seems that Luke confiscated them for some reason.  If he didn't know the importance tarot cards, why exactly did he take them in the first place?  I suppose that's a question we shouldn't ask. Shame on me for trying to make sense out of nonsense. Luke has the cards at the police station and so the plan is for Jace and Clary to accompany him to retrieve them.  We all know this isn't going to go smoothly right?

Simon wakes up in bed next to Maureen, who goes on and on about how amazing he was in bed. It's a moment of ridiculous ego stroking that read like an Axe commercial.  At any rate, Simon begins hallucinating that he is actually in bed with Clary.  When he accidentally calls Maureen Clary, she makes it clear that she is not about to be his side piece and Simon grabs his shit, makes a weak excuse and leaves. I like that Maureen stood up for herself but I am pissed that she is once again playing second to the glorious Clary, who I cannot figure out why everyone is so obsessed with.

Alec returns to the institute to learn that his sister covered for him with their parents.  That little deception is going to cost him because now Isabelle wants to know all about Alec's personal life. Isabelle justifies this request by claiming that she shares everything and therefore Alec should as well. I suppose Isabelle has never heard of the concept of boundaries. Alec says that he was with Magnus helping him heal Luke and that he might have shared a cocktail with him.  Isabelle is all, you can tell me everything you know but Alec pretends to let it all fly over his head.

So, back at the station, before Luke can get to his desk. he gets stopped by internal affairs. Capt. Vargas informs Luke that he is the prime suspect in not one but two murders. Just as Clary begins to worry, Jace spies Luke being given the perp walk. Yes, it seems they have a rune for everything. They decide to head into station and get the cup for themselves.  Clary's plan is to slap Jace and pretend they are breaking up and then root through Luke's desk to find her supposed missing keys.  Naturally, since this is Clary's plan, it doesn't work out and they learn that Luke's things have been taken by internal affairs.

In the meantime, poor Simon has been calling Clary repeatedly because he keeps having hallucinations.  At one point, he looks in the mirror and sees fangs in his mouth.  Things escalate when his mother and sister decide to hold an intervention after being informed by Maureen about Simon's weird behaviour and her belief that he is on drugs.  Simon tries to say the issue is that he is ill but neither his mother or sister actually listen to him and instead proceed to bicker. In frustration, Simon slams his fist on the desk, breaking it in two.  Of course, Clary is too busy chasing down the Mortal Cup to think for a moment about Simon and the one time he does manage to get her on the phone, she accuses him of being a hypochondriac, before Jace grabs the phone and ends the conversation.  Someone needs to tell me again what's so great about Clary.  Simon put himself in great danger to help her and this chick cannot even spare him a moment of her precious time. Yes, Clary officially fails at friendship.

The Immortals (Olympus Bound #1) by Jordanna Max Brodsky

Selene wanders through the streets of New York city, helping women who have been preyed upon by men; she protects the innocent.  Unfortunately, Selene's power is waning and though it scares her, she also knows that it might be inevitable.  Shortly after hearing a summons from a true believer, things begin to change and Selene finds herself embroiled in a mission to find a man who murders women in order to complete and ancient ritual.  With Theo, a classics professor by her side, she faces a choice she could not have predicted. Will she remain Selene the private detective, or return to being the Goddess Artemis, with all the power, coldness, and anger this entails.

In the interest of full disclosure, I'm going to straight up say, I am a huge mythology geek. When I realised that this book is about Greek gods living in the modern world, the only thing that would have given me pause before picking it up, is if it were paranormal romance or YA.  I'm happy to report that The Immortals is neither of the aforementioned and is actually quite grim and dark.  That being said, I must acknowledge that the premise - ancient Gods in our present times, is not something that is at all new; however, Brodsky does put an interesting twist on her story.

Once humanity stopped worshiping the Greek Gods, they found that their powers began to depart and so upon the orders of Zeus, the great diaspora began. Some Gods, like Dionysus mange to hold off the great fading because each night in bars across the world people still imbibe.  Apollo, God of music becomes an Indie Rock star and Hermes, the messenger benefits from things like branding through the apparel brand Hermès, and of course the fact that in the present, the transfer of information is faster than it ever has been. Even the little known Victory is doing well thanks to Nike. These Gods have managed to still to retain some of their strength but lose some of their talent - like Apollo's ability to heal or Hermes ability to fly for example have been forever lost. Not all Gods fared as well, Dionysus or Apollo.  Hestia, the Goddess of the Hearth for instance, simply faded away and died because she lacked the strength worship would have given her and because there's no place Goddess of the Hearth, in a world where people heat with gas or electric.  Though Artemis has many names, being the Goddess of the Hunt is a largely diminishing power in a world of factory farming. Still, Artemis insists om protecting the innocent and holding fast to her virginity.

Much is made of Artemis's virginity in The Immortals and her relationship with Orion. I must admit to being quite conflicted by it all.  On one hand, some would call Artemis explicitly feminist but then there is also the overt fixation on virginity and purity which stems from a place of misogyny and patriarchy. When you really think about the myths, Artemis is surrounded by rapist, even her father Zeus.  That being said, her constant hunting of men, combined with the over fixation on virginity was absolutely a problem for me.  To some degree, I would have preferred an asexual Artemis to the version we got in The Immortals.

As the protagonist of the story, Selene/Artemis left so much to be desired. I found her to be almost robotic.  Even in times when she was mourning for the loss of Orion, who had died millenniums ago, this character actually aroused very little sympathy from me.  Selene is neither human nor Goddess and thus she is very difficult to even remotely like, let alone identify with. Selene walks the street as a vigilante but not because she cares for women but because some part of her tells her to punish the men who hurt them. She is even willing to turn her back on a woman who returns to an abuser though we all know that there are multiple reasons why a woman may choose this option. Selene walks away from the few women she gets close to claiming that because she is a Goddess, she doesn't care about what happens to humans and yet, she is not a Goddess any longer.  I simply didn't like her as a protagonist at all.

Magicians, Season 1, Episode 7: The Mayakovsky Circumstance



Last week our main characters all turned into geese and flew to Antarctica. Because why not?

There they study under the teacher Myaskovsky, who is basically a vodka-swilling short tempered Russian stereotype. He’s an awesome teacher and kind of fun but we can’t deny that he is a stereotype. Just because a character is awesome doesn’t mean he isn’t a stereotype

His lessons are harsh, his contempt withering and, at times (especially with Kady), creepy but he does manage to teach them several difficult lessons in harsh conditions. He also finds Alice and Quinn’s endless sexual tension immensely frustrating – speaking for the audience when he says “why don’t you two just fuck?”. And doubly so when he says:

“Why are you both determined to be so fucking bland?”

Yes. In fact, let’s repeat this:

“Why are you both determined to be so fucking bland?”

His urging, and some kind of mind control involving foxes, eventually ends up with Alice and Quinn finally having sex. While part of me is glad we can leave the will-they-won’t-they behind, part of me also wonders just how much informed consent you have when a drunken angry authority figure keeps forcing you together while naked.

While Alice and Quinn continue to try not be so fucking bland, Penny and Kady also work through their issues after the relationship rift caused by her revelations last episode. This episode she decides to explain herself by allowing the psychic Penny to read her mind so he knows all about her history with Marina and the situation her mother is in. They reconcile (and sleep together) and Penny tries to offer her a way to buy off Marina forever by stealing from Myaskovsky

It turns out to be unnecessary because he also took the opportunity to read her mind – and is surprisingly kind and gentle with her – he recognises the wrong that she’s suffered and to tell her she’s free: a bitter sweet offer since that freedom comes with the death of her mother. He’s also warning her since Brakebills knows she’s been stealing from them and will punish her harshly regardless of extenuating circumstances: he’s giving her chance to run since he doesn’t agree with that punishment. But she has to leave Penny behind – because as a traveller he needs training if his powers aren’t going to get him killed. It’s a very sad scene – and does a lot to ensure that Myaskovsky isn’t entirely a 1 dimensional stereotype.

Tuesday, March 1, 2016

Lucifer, Season One, Episode Six: Favorite Son


Last week I complained about the idea of Lucifer as a cop investigating everyday crime in L.A.  It seemed short sighted and something that wouldn't maintain interest long and in fact, as of episode five, I was already getting bored, even though I very much love Tom Ellis as Lucifer.  Well, it seems that the writers recognized that Lucifer as a cop is a shortsighted device because this week, along with our regular case, we had a few developments that most certainly peeked my interest.

Lucifer arrives at a warehouse when called there by Chloe and learns that the case of the week is about security guard who has been killed. Lucifer is not the least bit interested and walks away from the case.  He even shows disinterest when Mazikeen informs him that it was his shipping crate which was stolen.  Mazikeen has to prick Lucifer's pride by questioning if this means that someone is free to steal from him now.  Despite Lucifer's nonchalance, he does at least to some degree care how he is viewed. Well, at least we know that Lucifer has one of the seven deadly sins - pride and that it can be used to manipulate him.

There was never a doubt that Lucifer must be a complicated being since he is essentially as old as time and is clearly the writers interpretation of the biblical Lucifer. Last week we saw Amenadiel worm his way into Linda's confidence and this week we got to see the results as he encouraged Linda to believe Lucifer's identity and use the bible to suggest how she should talk to him.  Linda agrees and in her session with Lucifer, she calls him Samael, a name he angrily rejects.  Linda persists and suggests that as Samael, he is God's favourite son.  This brings Lucifer's anger to the forefront.  He talks about the fact that he feels that he didn't do anything to deserve this and that his name is constantly impugned. He absolutely rejects the idea that he is responsible for humanity's bad acts.  For Lucifer, it has been eons of torture.  Ellis absolutely kills it with this scene as Lucifer's pain is laid bare for all to see.

Linda then goes in for the kill "You are his fallen angel, but here's the thing. When angels fall, they also rise. All you have to do is embrace all that you are,"  In this moment it is obvious how much Lucifer wants this to be true but he is stuck.  When he finally retrieved the container he showed Chloe that inside it were nesting dolls, but when he opened the secret compartment, he discovered that his glorious wings were missing.  This means that what is happening is no longer a game. Lucifer is no longer the rebellious son and he can no longer make decisions with his full autonomy and power. If that were not enough, the fact that he is becoming mortal will make the task of getting back his wings that much more difficult.  Who the hell has his wings and does that mean that there are other demons out there, or perhaps maybe angels out there working to keep Lucifer out of hell? When Lucifer shares the news with Mazikeen about the lost wings which are beautiful btw, his heartbreak is obvious.

Runaway Vampire (Argeneau #23) by Lynsay Sands

Like most, Mary's life had been a series of ups and downs.  Now a widow, Mary decides to take one last trip in her RV but the memories of the trips that she took with her husband haunt her so much that she decides to return home early, making a stop at friends RV park.  Mary had believed that the trip would be uneventful but that immediately changes when she accidentally runs over Dante Notte, who is on the run from kidnappers.

Dante is only looking to find help for himself and his brother Tomasso and doesn't expect when he is run over by Mary's RV that he has met his life mate - the one person who he can let his guard down around and love forever,  With the danger closing in around them, Dante must somehow convince Mary that he is an immortal and that they are meant to be together, all while keeping her safe from the kidnappers who may target her to get to him.

Those who are new to this series, will have no problem following along with the romance between Dante and Mary because Sands takes care to explain who and what immortals are, along with her concept of life mates.  For longtime readers, Sands does take the time to bring back Lucien the leader of the Immortals and since this is Dante's story, it's a return to the Notte twins. I would have liked to have seen more of the Immortals that we have been introduced to this far.

I really liked that fact that Mary is 62 and had lived a full life.  It's not often that mature women are presented as sexual beings and Sands left absolutely no doubt what Mary wanted from the moment she spied the very naked Dante.  This is the second book in this series in which Sands has gone out of her way to pair her handsome Immortal with an older woman and I love it. Mary is also not a woman to be played with and unfortunately has a very tragic backstory.  It is however problematic that Sands heavily implies that had Tomas not entered Mary's life that she was destined to be a lonely old woman living in a one bedroom apartment with her dog. I don't understand why Sands would go to such lengths to make a strong, sexual woman and then turn around and have her being content to just wilt away.  It absolutely belies just how vital women can be at all ages.

Runaway Vampire, while focusing on the romance between Mary and Dante also served as a set up for the next book which will clearly feature Tomasso finding his life mate in Venezuela.  To some degree, this left the story feeling unfinished.  I understand that the point of each book is to bring a couple together but I've always felt that there should be more to even paranormal romance books than the coupling, particularly when they are as long running as the Argeneua series.

One of my long running complaints about this world is that despite the length of the series, we have only recently been introduced to the idea that LGBT immortals exist and until Runaway Vampire, we haven't actually met any of them.  One would hope that after waiting so long to introduce gay characters to her series and the homophobia that Sands has engaged in in the past, that inclusion would be a step forward but alas, that was not to be the case.