Thursday, March 3, 2016

Teen Wolf, Season 5, Episode 19: The Beast of Beacon Hills

Corey takes Mason into hiding – this lasts about 5 minutes before he fails epicly (because he’s Corey and utterly useless in every way possible and can’t even hide even with an invisibility power). This ends up with Mason kidnapped by the Dread Doctors.

Naturally Scott & co start searching however they can. We get a completely-non-aware moment when Corey describes that we should totally have known that Mason was the Beast because the way he was dumped into the plot box every time action happened. Because this show has absolutely no idea how often it’s rammed gay and Black characters into the plot box.

By this logic, the unexplained absent Danny is actually an Archdemon or Lucifer or maybe Unicron.

But Theo and the gang also wants in on the action, being deftly manipulated and taunted by Deucalion who cleverly pokes Theo into absorbing the power of Josh, his zappy chimera, to use the dread mask and join the search (actually this turns out to be pretty useless as the mask only reveals what we all learned from last week’s Argent Storytime). Oh, and reveals that he was able to leave at any time because he’s Deucalion and Theo is an entitled teenager with a mopey streak who doesn’t know nearly as much as he thinks he does.

Despite absolutely no-one trusting Theo they all decide to trust Theo and the complete lack of any kind of knowledge, skills or utility he brings. Oh, he reveals that the Dread Doctors are tapping a preserved Nazi Alpha werewolf for immortality juice (I could have happily lived in a world where I didn’t have to type that sentence). Using the help of everyone but Theo (remind me again why he’s here?) they manage to find said undead alpha nazi werewolf (this sentence doesn’t get better typed a second time) and he is plugged into Mason via a tube into his neck which is unpleasant

We do get a use for Theo – like Deucalion the Dread Doctor’s just can’t resist taunting him by how useless and mundane and dull and a failure he is – not even a special evil (special evil turns from true good) until he sees to give up all of his plans and just launch himself at the Dread Doctors, along with Liam equally failing to do anything.

Except antagonist Mason into enduring agony and possible death to rip himself free of the Nazi alpha zombie werewolf (third time. No better) and transform. Without frequencies – he has made the final transformation into the Beast. The Dread Doctors consider this a victory… despite the Beast’s first action to squish all three doctors as easily as swatting flies (what exactly is their plan? Surely not elaborate suicide?)

On the plus side this saves Scott, on the minus side it also saves Liam and Theo. And it may result in Mason being lost.

Quick interlude – Lydia and the Argents successfully convince Parrish the Hellhound not to leave town by means of appealing to him (Lydia’s being doing this predicting death thing way too long) and by blowing out his tires. They don’t find the Pike though

So when they join the fight to stop the Beast doing more rampaging, it’s just Parrish’s fire and Chris’s big gun – which is good enough to turn the Beast back human

By which we mean back into Sebastian – not into Mason. This doesn’t bode well. Either he’s gone or we’ve found a more elaborate plot box to drop him into.

Meanwhile Kira and Malia have decided to have their own storylines. Kira goes back to the Skinwalkers with her sword – she wants to find balance but that’s a long term project. First she wants to be able to help, to get her sword back, and she’s willing to pay whatever price the Skinwalkers demand

While Malia and Braeden are duelling the Desert Wolf, Malia’s mother (there’s a brief and hilarious moment when they consider arming Stiles. Then everyone, including Stiles, decides this is a very very very very very bad idea and they’ll not be doing that). Which involves guns, Mountain Ash and my continuing to wonder WHY Braeden is risking her life for this?