Olympus, Season 1, Episode 6: The Lexicon

Flashback - to Hero’s parents having sex and Aegeus deciding after sex to tell Hero’s mother that she’s pregnant (we’re talking seconds after orgasm telling her). And the son is cursed - such a nice post sex talk.This probably would be far better as a PRE sex talk. He knows this because the “beast” in his soul has been ejaculated out of him

Oh and she has to go running and hiding to the middle of the wilderness now. Yeah this conversation should definitely have happened before sex - or maybe Aegeus is just this averse to prolonged cuddling after sex he tells this to all his hook ups to chase them out the bed? He gives her a ring and tells her to run off and raise his child in secret

Damn you’re not even going to slap him for this? He didn’t even tell her he was king!

Aegeus is attacked by Chalciope (the forest lady) and a minion who want their ring back, while wounded he manages to kill the minion and slash Chalciope’s face (because leaving enemies alive is the done thing for drama reasons). She thinks the Lexicon is bad, he thinks it’s good. They’re not looking to find middle ground here

This is all explained by Aegeus to his son, the Hero (and he let Chalciope escape so she could tell everyone Aegeus was alive so they’ve come after him, not Hero)

More exposition follows - Aegeus lied about the Lexicon because it helped him hold onto power and give his people hope. But he may have had an ulterior motive - he wanted to get rid of the Beast which made it hard to rule; or, as Hero puts it, he also viewed the Lexicon as a curse. Hero is pretty good at cutting through Aegeus’s self-serving excuses. Aegeus also calls him a guest - but it’s clear he’s a prisoner.

Medea isn’t impressed by Aegeus’s fatherly performs and quickly takes possession of the ring. She also tells Aegeus that Hero has to willingly work with them to give them the Lexicon (uh, why didn’t someone tell Cyrus and the Gaian priests that?)

She does a better job of questioning him (and learns Hero wants rid of the Lexicon and his whole story is just a series of random consequences). She warns him if he doesn’t let her solve the Lexicon he risks facing the wrath of the desperate Athenians.

Vampire Diaries, Season 6, Episode 21: I'll Wed You In the Golden Summertime

Bonnie wakes up (so she isn’t dead) in her Improbably Huge Dorm room (seriously, I’ve lived in flats about half the size of this room and my flat at uni would probably count as a closet to these women). She has a disturbing dream about Kai and Lilly coming to get her - and then wakes up to the far more horrifying reality of Elena coming to get her

And the improbably huge dorm room isn’t a dream. It’s just huge.

It’s Jo’s wedding. And they do wedding things that involved weddingness. Caroline has gotten through her funk over all the death to join in playing weddings.

Tyler and Matt and Alaric are also getting Alaric ready for the wedding. This being Mystic Falls this involves hard liquor. Because everything in this town involves hard liquor.

The good part of all of this is seeing Caroline organise stuff which is always fun, and Caroline treating Elena like she’s made of porcelain because she decided to throw away her super powers for no damn reason.They also take the time to discuss Caroline’s need to apologise to everyone for the fun murder tour and Elena turning human and Damon offering to do the same.

Stefan, meanwhile, is taking Damon on a grand tour of mundane humanity and how it’s really not Damon’s thing. It’s actually a really good demonstration of the many things a 21st century human has to deal with that Damon, with his ability to kill and compel, never has had to worry about. He also throws in that Stefan won’t be able to see him - because if he knows where Damon is someone could torture the information out of him to find the location of the cure (doesn’t that apply to Elena right now?)

But Damon has already invested money in creating Elena’s dream life - Stefan is impressed and calls Elena to tell her that. She urges him to keep trying to get through to Damon and Stefan drops a bombshell - what if Damon and Elena split up like many (most) couples do? Especially with the added tension of Damon being human. Damon becomes bad tempered and violent but Stefan keeps hitting him with hard truths. Including that Elena, being a fragile human, could just die and leave human Damon alone.

he ends with the excellent line “you can’t do this for me or for her, you have to want to be human for yourself.”

A Demon Bound (Imp #1) by Debra Dunbar

Samantha has managed to live amongst the humans for forty years by masking her identity.  Being an imp, she cannot resist things like leaving gum on the floor of an expensive restaurant, dressing and behaving inappropriately and beating up her tenants when they refuse to pay their rent on time.  She has developed a great flirtation with her neighbour Wyatt and while she would like to "own" him one day, she isn't bored enough yet to lose the great friendship they have.

Things might have continued on that way for Samantha had she not killed a werewolf in defense of her hellhound pet.  Tasked with taking on a rogue angel to pay back her debt to the werewolves, Samantha finds herself in more danger than she ever has been before. Can Samantha find a way to stop one angel dedicated to the genocide of the werewolves, while dealing with another angel who is determined to bend her to his will?

As a first book, A Demon Bound wasn't a bad introduction to this series.  I would have liked to have seen more active world building but get the sense that this is something Dunbar plans to reveal slowly over the next couple of books.   It seemed weird to me that Samantha, herself a demon, who was aware of elves and angels, would be shocked at the existence of werewolves. This was explained because of the supposedly secret nature of werewolves and the limited time that demons got to spend on the earhly plane but something didn't feel quite right about that.  We know that there is an angel council and once demons had legions because of wars.  Without further information, the reader  is left to assume that the rift between the two groups is based on Christian mythology.  I really didn't have a problem with this as Dunbar didn't even come close to proselytizing in A Demon Bound. For the most part, other than the obvious self righeousness, angels read like any other supernatural creatures.  I took particularly delight each time Gregory, (an angel) called Samantha a cockroach.  I also liked that angels weren't the fluffy and warm image that we see so often.  Despite the celebrity good looks, it's clear that angels can be assholes.


I liked Samantha from the very beginning. Yes, she's absolutely evil at the start but grows over time. There were several times I found myself giggling at her antics.  I loved the way she constantly looked to cause trouble,  even if meant walking around naked to upset the puritanical werewolf Candy.  The more Candy balked about Samantha's naked ways, the more Samantha became outrageous.  Samantha wasn't always a smart protagonist in that she seemed to constantly antagonize Gregory (a very powerful angel). In that sense she seemed to have a bit of Kellie Independence going on but I found myself rooting for her every step of the way.

Supernatural, Season 10, Episode 21 Dark Dynesty

Case of the week - a clinical study on eyesight and the nice doctor man is nicely visiting this week’s victim after hours. Slice dice death and eye removal - and a man who can leap from tall buildings

But leaving bodies behind and being seen by janitors is clearly a big no-no in his family and daddy gives him, Eldon, a stern talking to in front of his brothers and cousins for leaving bodies around, tut-tut. The eye removing thing is a family tradition. He’s got to fix his little mistake which involves cleaning up his little problem and hunting down the Winchesters since they killed his brother, Jacob and took their evil book of evil - so this would be the Styne family. They are businessmen, have evil-books of evil, keep it in the family AND like to collect eyes. For trying to play intra-family politics, his cousin Eli also gets his knuckles wrapped for failing to hunt down Charlie.

Said evil book of evil is currently in the hands of Rowena because Sam gave it to her (which the whole world will be regretting later.)

He tries to cover up this ridiculous decision with Dean who has, conveniently, decided to investigate the Stynes in case they come calling again. Dean’s also found the case of the missing eyed woman and men jumping out of tall windows - since he’s still looking for distractions from the Mark of Cain.

Sam decides to share his terrible plan of terribleness with Charlie. He wants her to help Rowena because the book is not only in an ancient language but also in code. Charlie points out how this is the worst idea in the world ever - but of course she agrees.

Rowena and Charlie aren’t the biggest fan of each other. Castiel also drops in and an angel being around makes even Rowena hesitate. He’s there to keep an eye on Rowena and ensure she plays nice since Angel, generally, beats everything (though Castiel does resent the idea that Sam doesn’t have time to referee but he does - leaving Sam to briefly beg). Like Charlie, Castiel is also very much against doing all this without telling Dean - secret between the brothers never end well. Of course they still all agree - Castiel, Sam and Charlie all nobly declaring “for Dean” (and Rowena throwing in a “I barely know the man” because she may be evil but she’s also kind of awesome).

Castiel also brings pork rinds. This is proof he may be evil. Rowena trying to find similarity with Charlie also leads to a lot of excellent eye-expressions between Charlie and Castiel. Rowena then lays out several very compelling similarities between them. She’s also trying to undermine her loyalty to the Winchesters.

Dying Bites (The Bloodhound Files #1) by D.D. Barant

FBI profiler Jace Valchek is awoken in the middle of the night and told to grab her three most essential tools because she is being transferred to a new top secret division.  Jace does end up working for a new government agency but one in a parallel universe - a world in which vampires, lycanthropes and gollums make up the majority of the world's population.  Before Jace can return home, she is tasked with tracking and apprehending a human serial killer who is bent on changing the balance of power in the world, even if it means destroying it. 

Barant doesn't waste anytime diving into the story and the reader, along with Jace, must quickly learn the rules of the world he has created.  The problem is that as a guide, Jace would not have been my choice.  Jace plays the typical tough girl to hilt, verging into belligerent and rude more often than not.  Jace screams and throws tantrums making it hard to believe that she is an FBI profiler. At times, I found myself actively questioning her stability. There is also the issue that there is little connecting Jace to her former world.  Jace's parents are dead (big surprise there) and she has few close friends.

Jace is brought to the parallel world because the NSA is chasing down a serial killer they believe to be insane and since Lycanthropes and Vampires have immunity to such human frailties, they have no experience dealing with the mentally ill.  Here's the thing, given everything that the supernaturals have done to humans, it seems absolutely rational to me for humans to want to fight back.  In the alternate world history, humans were enslaved, treated like cattle and drained, imprisoned and dismembered.  It's worth keeping in mind that though lycnathropes and vampires have their immunities, they are longer lived, stronger and faster than the average human.  With the human population reduced to one million why wouldn't someone step forward?  

The antagonist plans to release an ancient God to fight against the lycanthropes and vampires.  This makes perfect sense to me because the vampires and lyncanthropes unleashed an ancient God on humans killing 6 million of them.  At any rate, Jace of course foils his plans but the limited exposure to the release of the God, still leaves the 150,000 of the affected supes with schizophrenia, irrational phobias,  and multiple personality disorder.  The implication is that they will be violent and difficult to deal with because this society has no experience with mental illness.  All in all the portrayal of mental illness in this book is terrible because to be mentally ill in Barant's world, is to be a violent killer capable of atrocity. 

Forever, Season 1, Episode 22: The Last Death of Henry Morgan

I’m not loving this episode title. Not loving it at all. Don’t do this Forever.

In an archive, a woman is checking a delivery, an ancient Roman Gladius (the weapon that killed Adam?). She cuts herself on it… and then we cut to her dead body being found by Jo and Hanson

And Lucas desperately trying to fill Henry’s shoes. Badly. Henry isn’t there because he’s at Abigail’s funeral - something Jo didn’t know

To that deeply touching funeral and Henry doing his best not to fall apart and declaring vengeance against Adam. Eternal vengeance. Literally. We also launch this week’s flashbacks to 1945, Henry and Abigail all happy - and Henry learning that Abigail had an abusive past before meeting them

So to the case and Henry does his Sherlock thing and they identify Blair Dryden who worked in an antiquities museum. To the museum and Diane Clarke, the head curator. Of course Henry goes as well, do we even have to pretend to be surprised by this point?

Henry does his investigating thing and discovers an old roman knife is missing - and of course he thinks of Adam. Hopes for revenge raises its ugly head. Henry runs to see Abe while Adam watches from a distance looking all ominous

Abe hears Adam’s theory about the weapon that can kill them - and quickly locks up Henry’s antique gun which fired the bullet that killed him. He’s also not that happy that Henry decided to keep that gun around - realising that when he is dead there’s a good chance that Henry would also kill himself. Coupled with Henry saying Abigail saved him, Abe repeats what he’s said before - Henry needs someone.

Hanson is all kind of geeky about ancient weapons calling himself practically an expert - though Reece would prefer a real one. And the real one would be Henry, of course. So it’s off to see a Mr. Griffin, an expert in ancient weapons who Blair spoke to. Also played by John Noble so everything just got 56% more creepy and 24% more sinister.

He reveals the knife that Blair found was one of the daggers that killed Caesar. And that it’s supposed to be cursed. Next step is Blair’s fiance, Duane, who they just learn about. Interviewing him they learn about a fake mugging (well… actual mugging) that Duane’s friend Xander pulled on Blair to steal the dagger (in that he actually did steal from her with violence it really is an ACTUAL mugging. Oh Blair, this guy was not a keeper).

iZombie, Season 1, Episode 8: Dead Air

Liv enjoys a highly erotic foot run from Lowell (hey, if he’s going to wear those boxers he can rub anything he wants) and I have to giggle at the idea of “Kelly Clarkson” being a safe word. The implication is that this is a post-sex foot rub.

And her phone rings. Let it be known now that if I am in bed with a half naked Bradley James, not only will I not answer it (even if the house is on fire) but I will hunt down and murder and eat the brains of the caller.

Liv hangs up on Major (who is in prison. No, no excuse.)

in the car Liv reflects on all the things she can’t enjoy as a zombie and is happy that sex is no longer one of those things. She’s also enjoying a new relationship call-in radio show

Since Liv was distracted, it’s Ravi who is waiting for Major to be released (and we have an awesomely snarky desk clerk). More effective is Payton who is an ADA who rips into said snarky desk clerk with her legal super powers and has Major released right away. Ravi is, rightfully, impressed. Major has also been pretty badly beaten while in prison

He is, sadly, not interested in suing but more concerned about the missing kids. Which means it’s down to Ravi to break the news about their deaths since everyone is buying last week’s cover up. Except Major - he is sure the police are lying

To the morgue where Liv is listening to her radio (much to Ravi’s disgust) and the hose dies on air. To the body!

She was electrocuted and Clive is on scene to call it murder - her microphone was sabotaged. Ravi makes a too-soon joke (awww, Ravi, I laughed). They learn that the woman who called in threatening to kill the woman her husband was cheating on her with seemed to be aiming her threats at the victim, Sasha. A slightly more honest (or cruel) co-worker tells them that Sasha had a thing for men who were already in relationships. They also confirm that’s just about anyone has access to set up the trap

So it’s time for Liv to plough through 30 hours of Sasha’s broadcasts while eating her brains. Ravi also asks after Peyton as he’s interested, Liv quickly changes the subject apparently thinking that she won’t be interested - so they discuss rat zombie cures. And find that all the rats are dead and their brains missing (and Liv makes a Game of Thrones reference? That’s it this show will forever be hailed as beyond awesome).

They find the escapes zombie rat (“he’s white and murderous, you did it!”) which Liv is all thrilled about while Ravi, wisely, jumps on the high furniture. Liv is safe, as she cutely explains to her little zombie rat, because zombie brains are nasty. She also giggles very inappropriately at the idea of the rat ending civilisation.

Incite (Ignite #2) by Erica Crouch

Hell has invaded Heaven and won. Azael is the king of hell, Lucifer sits on the golden throne and the Earth is in ruins

Among these ruins the demon Pen and Archangel Michael try to survive the forces of heaven and hell both of which are hunting them.

While they are running, seemingly doomed, they do find one thing to give them hope: New Genesis, angels and demons who are no longer willing to align with Heaven or Hell. Maybe there’s space for a third way.

I am glad that we got on to the rebellion in this book about half way through because for a large part of this book (and, to be honest, the first book) we didn’t seem to have much to rest on. Azael hates Pen because she betrayed him and how terribad awful is that. Meanwhile Pen and Michael love each other forever and ever because… reasons. Yes, reasons, because they have only been together for such a very short period of time.

It’s rather lacking as a plot line. It’s not even a plot line, it’s just a list of emotions. I’m not even sure of the actions it pushes them into. Why are Lucifer and Azael so invested in hunting down Pen? Why are the angels so invested in gunning for Michael given everything else is going on? It doesn’t help that these heavy emotion doesn’t help these characters. These characters are supposed to be thousands of years old, they’re supposed to be older than humanity itself. And I just don’t see it. They’re so emotional, they’re so over-dramatic, they’re so out of control, they’re so inclined to monologue and angst and… they feel like teenagers.

So all of that wasn’t sold to me - but the rebellion? This I like and I hope it is developed a lot more in future books because it badly needs it. The Rebellion and the whole idea that both Heaven and Hell have lost their way and that the rigid black and white thinking simple doesn’t work in this shades-of-grey world. It adds context to Pen and Michael defecting because it wasn’t just about true love, it was about being deeply disillusioned with their own side.