Tuesday, March 6, 2018

Stargate Origins: Season 1, Episode 6 & 7

So this rather bizarre, not especially well made but full of pretty people strangeness continues

The Nazis, still bizarrely speaking English, use the professor to translate for them and the professor does so for he is a jellyfish. They want to make an alliance with the Goa’uld for their shiny tech so they show Aset a film reel of Nazi Germany which Aset seems to find impressive and her minion seems to be a bit weird about a projector

Isn’t Goa’uld technology rather advanced and their armies rather larger for them to be that impressed by Nazi Germany?

And why is this Goa’uld impressed by, basically, shadow puppetry? And was she really impressed by a machine gun?

Y’know looking at the main series and this one, I question why the male Goa’uld seemed to wear rather a lot of clothing up to and including metal gold suites while the female Goa’uld wear a few scraps of nothing and, for one of these, daisy dukes.

Laughably the wikia actually says Goa’uld have no concept of gender (despite having queens and rigid gender roles. So hmmmmm)

Aset also notes that Nazi Germany takes many slaves which a) makes Aset thinks humans are ready to be enslaved again and means this show is dancing in dubious dubious territory. And b) this is what the Nazis can do for her: give her lots and lots of slaves

Because last episode she was all; for getting allies to fight Ra has turned into getting slaves to worship her. Her attention span is somewhat limited it seems

The professor also needs to grow a spine.

In exchange she’s going to give them the magic rock lots of Goa’uld tech is made out of which can smash through most things. Because this is pre-energy weapons and the Goa’uld fight by hitting stuff?

Now to the three pretty but inept people

Wasif is alive while James and Catherine argue a lot over how her dive in first and think never gets people stabbed. This quickly turns into sadness about her dad and then further sexual tension between James and Catherine and even Wasif is getting tired of this

Their captors return and Wasif reveals he can almost understand them because they’re kind of speaking something not entirely different from Coptic, which his grandma spoke. He said he would have told them earlier but Catherine is kind of hard to interrupt. He’s not wrong

Their captors reveal they are actually prisoners and there’s lots and lots of arguing and shouting and slapping until someone spots Catherine’s Ra amulet. They assume she’s a friend of Ra’s and all start bowing and apologising

Followed by having a big party with lots of food (which no-one recognises, including Wasif who also gives James a justifiable poke for assuming he will recognise it just because he’s Egyptian).

They watch a play about Aset - basically she was one of Ra’s followers and Ra got super pissed at her, then he forgive her and resurrected her and brought her back to watch other them all. She also shared healing sticks with them so… I guess better than your average Goa’uld? And they all worship her because that’s pretty much standard operating procedure

While Catherine has belatedly realised that Nazis with magic sticks is probably a bad idea (even if the mental image of the SS going into battle armed with twigs is faintly ridiculous) so she needs to stop them! Right now! While high and drunk and in the middle of the night in a desert!

This would be the running off without thinking ever thing

James distracts her from her latest suicidal ages and we return to the sexual tension thing


Wasif you’re too good for these people

And who the hell is the guy on the poster for this anyway? It's not James - this is James

So whose this guy and why's he up there in my banner?