Zombie Fallout (Zombie Fallout #1) by Mark Tufo

It's flu season and with a particularly virulent strain of the H1N1 virus cutting a swath through the U.S.,  people rush to get the flu shot.  What they don't know is that instead of saving their lives, the shot will turn them into the undead.  Almost overnight, the zombies take over and become bent on feeding themselves.  They're not picky and will eat any body part available. Unfortunately for the survivors, the smallest bite will have them joining the zombie horde.

Mike Talbot had always been a little bit of a of a survivalist and so when the zombie plague hit, he thought that he was well prepared.  His number one mission is to save his family somehow.  Mike is luckier than most in that it seems that divine intervention in the form of the booming voice of Ryan Seacrest and a zombie girlfriend, are determined that he and those he loves will survive.

The zombies in this novel are the slow moving creeping dead that we have become accustomed to.  This is where the standard approach ends because these zombies while not as intelligent as a living breathing human being, have retained some of their smarts.  Talbot first notices this when a zombie attempts to use wire cutters to get at him.  Zombies even have the smarts to herd the remaining humans to make their feasting easier.  A mindless zombie is one thing but one that can grow and learn is another.

In many ways, Zombie Fallout attempted to be funny.  I will admit that there were times I did laugh out loud at the pop culture references like a deity's voice being that of Ryan Seacrest but at time, the childish humor of hey everyone wasn't that a disgusting fart felt puerile. 

As aforementioned, Talbot is a survivalist and even an ex marine.  Before the apocalypse he took his boys out on the weekend to learn to shoot a gun properly.  If one is concerned with survival this makes sense but why did he never bother to teach his daughter or his wife?  Both women were so incompetent they didn't even know how to load a weapon, let alone shoot it, leaving them dependent so to speak on the menfolk.  Talbot takes great care to constantly remind his sons that it is their duty to protect their mother and their sister.  Even with the plague going on and zombies roaming the world, Talbot still didn't teach the women he supposedly loved the most to shoot.  If that were the only problem with the female characters, I could have let it go but there wasn't a single likeable female character in the entire novel. Tracy, Talbots wife spent most of the novel being a shrew.  Though Talbot was a marine, he deferred to her but not out of respect.  I don't even recall a scene where Tracy was involved that didn't include yelling.

Lost Girl, Season Four, Episode Nine: Destiny's Child

This episode opens with the train, which is clearly falling apart with someone doing work on it.  A hole is blast through the side and a crown appears on the floor. This is foreshadowing I suppose.

At the Dahl, Bo announces that she is going to get to the bottom of everything that is going on.  She pulls the jar of shadows out of the box and Kenzi points out that this is the same black smoke which took her away in the first place.  The bickering starts, with Kenzi and Trick on the side of not opening the jar and Dyson and Lauren being super supportive of Bo's decision. Kenzi grabs the jar but Bo manages to snatch it back.  Bo says the not knowing is driving her crazy.  Bo takes the lid off and the black smoke crawls out and turns into a man.

Apparently, smoke guys name is Hugin and he declares that he is the most humble servant of The Wanderer.  Oh dear, is Lost Girl going to mess with Norse mythology now?  We know that Hunin is one of Odin's ravens and he has also been referred to as The Wanderer. I must ask, is there a reason why Hunin would speak with an English accent, if he is Norse? Hunin makes sure to say that The Wanderer is the great father but of course the little band of Bo worshipers doesn't buy it. Bo says that she needs to get back on the train and Hunin denies knowing where the train is because Munin apparently trapped him in the jar the moment Bo got on the train.  Bo again demands to return and Hunin agrees to help, as long as Bo helps to him get revenge on Munin, for sleeping with his wife.  Hunin demands he go only with Bo and Bo has to tell her worshipers  that she needs them to watch her walk away because she has to do this.  Of course, Bo takes a moment to personally calm Dyson and Lauren - gotta keep that love triangle going while she is gone.  As they prepare to leave, Hunin warns that when they get on the train, if it turns out that Bo is an enemy of The Wanderer that he will flay her.  The two disappear in a cloud of black smoke and Tamsin walks in wanting to know what she missed.

Dyson heds to a locker room where he grabs a gun but is quickly joined by Lauren.  It seems team love triangle is planning to rush in as the cavalry. Dyson gives Lauren a knife for protection. They banter a little bit about the choice Bo has to make before leaving.  These two really need to grow some self respect.

Trick is in his office and Tamsin and Kenzi rush in to find out why he is obsessing about Hunin. Trick tries to blow them off but Kenzi makes it clear that Trick must know something because he is the "Yoda" of the group.  Trick tries to push past them and Kenzi again demands to know what is going on. Trick hits below the belt, declaring that he doesn't have time to explain himself to a human and a low life. It's harsh I know, but he is after all the Blood King.  Trick apologises and tells fake Cagney and Lacey to leave it be.  Of course, Kenzi suggests that she and Tamsin snoop.

Hunin and Bo arrive at a fae burial ground. Hunin warns if Bo steps on a grave that she will be dragged down to the netherworld.  Hunin says that he and Munin used to live here.  A crow craws in the background and of course it is Munin.  Munin also has a ridiculous accent which does not fit who he is supposed to be.  Okay the crow clothing is cool but it is worth mentioning that Hunin and Munin are not supposed to be crows, they are ravens. Munin craws and more crows turn human and surround Hunin and Bo.  Bo and Hunin try to make a run for it and are stopped by Hunin's wife. Bo and Hunin take off running again.

In the meantime, fake Cagney and Lacy (read: Kenzi and Tamsin) snoop until they find a blank book.  Kenzi says that Trick was writing in this book when Bo was taken and that this is what Trick used to re-write the future and save Bo.  Kenzi has determined that Trick is wrapped up in this and that Trick is once again keeping secrets from Bo.  Tamsin tries to interject some common sense but Kenzi is determined.  Kenzi declares they need to find where Trick has hidden a container of his blood.

Trick has gone to see Dao Ming to find her sister.  Dao Ming asks if Trick is there to win her sister back.  Trick declares that he no longer lives as royalty and says that he needs answers.  It seems that Dao Ming's sister is away and she refuses to help Trick.  Trick says that there is a memory which has been blocked by someone very powerful and therefore he wants Dao Ming to force him to tell the truth so that he can recover the memory.  Trick tells Dao Ming that he must have done this to himself and Dao Ming calls it interesting.  Dao Ming agrees to help, as long as Trick agrees to answer her question truthfully. Dao wants to know why Trick her sister over her.

Hunin and Bo are finaly cornered and agree to fight their way out but Hunin quickly betrays her saying that he has grown to hate Bo.  Bo reminds Hunin that it was The Wanderer who screwed him over. It seems that the plan was always for Hunin and Munin to slit Bo's throat. Bo crosses her arms and falls on one of the graves, disappearing from view.

Bo is now in the netherworld and mysterious voice calls out a riddle.The Leviathan steps forward claiming to know Bo and then makes a grab for Bo's soul.  Okay, if they are in the netherworld, shouldn't Bo be confronting Hel? Just saying - if you're going to mess with a mythology, you sort of have to stick with it.  The Leviathan is not able to accomplish her goal because of the mark on Bo and she declares that the mark was supposed to be hers.  Bo wants to leave but The Leviathan demands the mark and declares that no one ever leaves here. Bo pulls a knife but the Leviathan wants to play a game of riddles to which Bo agrees to play.

Dao Ming is continuing her magical interrogation of Trick, who is forced to answer truthfully all of her questions. Hey, didn't she originally only ask for one question? Dao Ming declares that whatever is buried in him is too dangerous. Trick says that Bo's life is in danger and begs her to continue. Dao Ming agrees to continue.

Fangs for the Fantasy Podcast: 2014, Episode 1

We're back after the New Year!

r book of the week and some of the shows we've been following all through our social justice analysis.

You can join us here and you can listen live on our youtube channel, here, or in our sidebar. All will also carry a recording after the show is finished. As ever all our previous podcasts can be found in the archive

The podcast begins at 7:00pm EST

22nd December - 13th January: Tempest Unleashed by Tracy Deebs

6th January - 13th January: Fury of the Demon by Diana Rowland

13th January - 20th January: Bloodlines by Eileen Wilks

20th January - 27th January: Written in Blood by Anne Bishop

27th January - 3rd February: Under Attack by Hannah Jayne

3rd February - 10th February: Wild Things by Chloe Neil

10th February - 17th February: Faefever by Karen Marie Moning

Fangs for the Fantasy Book of the Week

We're back after the holidays! Did you miss us?

It's time for 2014's first podcast - and like all  the Fangs for the Fantasy podcasts (archives here) we read a book and discuss it on the show. 

To give people a chance to read along with us, especially over the holidays, we include a list of our planned books of the week for the next few shows, so people can get the books, read them and join in the conversation.

 Our podcast will be at 7:00pm EST tonight 

22nd December - 13th January: Tempest Unleashed by Tracy Deebs

6th January - 13th January: Fury of the Demon by Diana Rowland

13th January - 20th January: Bloodlines by Eileen Wilks

20th January - 27th January: Written in Blood by Anne Bishop

27th January - 3rd February: Under Attack by Hannah Jayne

Fury of the Demon (Kara Gillian Series #6) by Diana Rowland

Kara and Mzatal are desperate to find Idris before the coalition of Lords holding him use him for whatever nefarious plans they have. After months of training in the demon world, she has to follow the trail to Earth, reconnecting with all her old friends – and dealing with the changes they’ve made in her absence

But retrieving Idris is far from simple, even with a demon lord as powerful as Mzatal – great power means little if there are innocents in the cross fire, and less when you don’t even know what sinister forces you’re opposing. Even more complicated, Ryan’s cover for the exiled demon lord Szerain is cracking and Zack, one of Kara’s greatest friends, is torn with his loyalty to Rhyzkahl, Kara’s greatest enemy; can she even trust him any more? And what about his relationship with her best friend, Jill?

And under it all, Rhyzkahl and his fellows are still determined to have Kara.

I could see the disaster racing towards me and, like all the best horror movies, I just couldn’t stop it. It seemed simple, just a little reading before going to bed.

At 2:00am I was still reading. I knew I should put it down and go to sleep, that would be sensible.

At 3:00am I was still reading. Things were getting dire, all common sense dictated I should put the book down… just one more chapter.

At 4:00am I had actually tried to go to sleep 3 times but each time I made some easy excuse to read just one more page

I was saved at 6:00am, when the book ended. Though I did have 10 minutes of shocked disappointment that it did end. Who said it could end?

There, it’s awesome – go buy it.

What you want more detail? Fine. Let’s start with a quasi, almost, sorta criticism. This book actually starts fairly slowly – so slowly that, for a brief, terrible moment, I suspected this may not be as toweringly awesome as the previous books in the series. But there is a reason for that slowness – there’s a lot of recapping and reminders, telling us who everyone is, the demons, the world, the various magics and the many events that have come together to get to this point. It’s a problem that can hit any book series once it gets past book 5 and especially for a series where we have moved and changed so much since the first book. Normally I’d say just to not bother, recapping 5 books worth of content in a few chapters never works – but in this case it isn’t even recapping for the sake of recapping – all of this vast amount of information was relevant to the plot in this book. Much as it made for a slow start, I can’t say the recapping was unnecessary.

Dracula, Season 1, Episode 8: Come to Die

Grayson needs to top up his angst levels so mopes about when he was first captured by the Ordo Draco. Renfield again tries to get Grayson to drop his obsession with Mina since he’s stalking her again

Mina herself is busy jeopardising her hopes and dreams and career by searching for Van Helsing’s serum (vampire blood). She’s nearly caught but it’s only her dad wondering why she’s avoiding everyone and pointing out he’s spotted her obsession with Grayson. She describes her obsession; and I’m pretty sure her dad has basically advised her to chuck Jonathon and go for Grayson. I have to agree. One is an unholy blood drinking demon, the other is Jonathon.

Demon it is then.

Lady Jayne remembers she’s a hunter and points out the vampires she’s killed to Lord browning who praises her in the most patronising terms. She’s sure there’s another elder about, what with so many young vamps trolling the town

She goes out hunting and finds another vampire – she demands to know the name of her master. The vampire is initially reluctant but gives up: The One, Vlad the Impaler the first etc etc super special. Lady Jayne is suitably impressed. The vampire shoots herself in the head rather than tell her any more

(Oh a WOC she lasted… 10 seconds? 20?)

She reports that to Browning, Davenport and another Order member (both of which think Dracula is a myth and she’s being very very silly). She recounts Vlad’s history (including his one membership of the Order) and how he was created. While Browning doesn’t dismiss her out of hand, he still wants proof.

To Jonathon and he’s still fretting away at how Grayson manipulated him with the fake story – and tells all to Szarbo. Szarbo gives him a gun in case Grayson tries to silence Jonathon like he did the actress.

Jonathon goes to Mina and gives a list of things he thinks Grayson has done in the name of advancing his project – not just General Shaw, but Lord Laurent as well. She asks why he keeps working for Grayson if he’s evil – and Jonathion basically says “REASONS!” and tells her to stay away. Which doesn’t look like he has a hidden motive AT ALL.

Grayson gets another dose of daylight drug and Van Helsing criticises him for his unfortunate killing of the head of Scotland Yard. After renewing his vow to get his revenge somehow, Grayson pops in on Lady Jayne. Who doesn’t want to see him – she confronts him with his love for Mina and he agrees. She won’t play the game any more and he leaves.

Lord Davenport’s plans also advance – he has arranged to have some “reliable” men “introduced” to Mina.

Grimm, Season 3, Episode 10: The Eyes of the Beholder

“I am glad it’s night, you do not look on me, for I am much ashamed of my exchange.”

Juliette is having dinner with Alicia and gently trying to confirm that this time Alicia is not going to return to her abusive partner again. Grimm joins them for lunch and everything’s bright and happy. When Alicia goes to the bathroom, Nick lets Juliette know that Alicia is a Wesen – not in the “run, she’s scary” sense but more worried that when Alicia finds out she’s rooming with a Grimm she may have the screaming meemies and run back to Joe

To the crime of the week – a guy, Jarded, leaves a diner after flirting with his girlfriend, Joy the waitress to a much less pleasant sight – 3 men beating up a fourth, severely, with a woman screaming for help. The man on the ground briefly woges before being knocked unconscious. Jarded distracts the attackers by shouting and they move towards him – but someone else leaves the Diner and the attackers flee – as does Jerry, panicked, seen by the new witness.

Wu, Hank and Nick arrive to learn the man who was attacked, Alonzo, died and the attackers didn’t even rob him. Of course the witness thinks Jarded was responsible since he saw him leave the scene. Joy, talks to Hank mentioning that she thought Alonzo was in a gang – or at least not someone to be messed with – something she repeats to Jarded when he rings her wondering what to do; say nothing, don’t draw attention or he could be next – she certainly doesn’t think the police can or will protect him.

The attackers ominously talk about Jerry and whether they need to do something about him. Just in case we’re slow on the uptake

To Juliette and Alicia and now we know the real reason Nick never told her he was a Grimm – she’s awful at keeping secrets. After acting really clumsily and unnaturally for a bit, Alicia realises there’s something up. Juliette spills the big secret – she knows Alicia is a Wesen! And Alicia… has no idea what she’s talking about and she gets quite snappy about it.

She goes to see Rosalie for advice and Rosalie explains to her how used to hiding most Wesen are – and how a few Wesen are in denial anyway.

At the police station Nick and Hank confirm Alonzo’s gang affiliations – which naturally raises the question of gang warfare and Wu turns up surveillance footage of Jerry leaving the scene in his sister’s car. Of go Hank and Nick to see… Hank’s physiotherapist, Zuri. Yes Jarded’s sister is Zuri – he arrives while Hank and Nick try to figure this out – and he runs. They chase him and catch him – and Hank now has zero chance with Zuri.

At the police station they confirm that Zuri and Jarded have clean records – unlike their father who is in prison (which means Zuri is looking after her brother alone), Nick thinks Hank is awfully close to this one but Hank’s not dropping out – and he’s pretty sure Jarded’s innocent. They question him but he’s following Joy’s advice and saying nothing. Hank tries to talk Zuri into convincing Jarded to talk but she isn’t a fool – she has no wish to see her brother testify in a gang case.

Helix, Season 1, Episodes 1 (Pilot) & 2 (Vector)

Since this is a double episode, it's a long recap: skip to the end for my first thoughts on Helix.

2 days ago

It was apparently very cold and windy (in a place that looks like it’s always very cold and windy) and we have an isolated underground bunker and people in Hazmat suits and a computer voice over saying “contamination over and over.” Well that’s set that scene. 2 Haz-mat clad people calmly walk down the halls, elsewhere a man, not wearing plastic, runs in sweaty panic; until someone grabs him from behind.

The Haz-mat suited people arrive in a room full of dead people – messily dead people, a jaunty tune playing on the Ipod shows the director has his art-schools staples down. There is one survivor, suffering on the floor with prominent veins and black goo coming from his mouth. When one of the haz-matted men offers him water he seems afraid – when he calmly squirts some down his throat the ill man starts convulsing and his throat bulging nastily.

Eerily clam and disturbing haz-matted man calls this “progress”.

To the CDC in Atlanta – possibly the present. Introducing Dr. Alan Farragut (giving a lecture on historic cholera outbreaks, epidemiology and John Snow whose name doesn’t appear in the history books nearly enough. He also loses things) and Dr. Sarah Jordan (finding the things he’s lost). He has a flare for the dramatic, throwing vials of cholera around to teach his new class of CDC operatives what’s at stake if they fumble. The drama and joke afterwards is interrupted by a woman entering with a very serious look on her face. She’s Dr. Julia Walker

He’s lead to a conference lead by Major Sergio Balleseros about a private company’s arctic research facility having an outbreak of some kind which is a Bad Thing. People are dead, he wants to take a CDC response team to the site: for extra problems, because it’s about the 89^th parallel, there’s apparently no jurisdiction and they’re getting access because Artic Biosystems is generously allowing it – yeah that sounds very very very bad (shouldn’t the WHO be called then?). Now for some personal bombshells – Dr. Walker was specifically requested, but she wants Dr. Alan Farragut (everyone’s going to end up being called by first names by the end of this, I’m too lazy to keep this up) because one of the infected is Peter – Dr. Peter Farragut. Alan’s brother.

I hope there’s a reason for giving Alan the personal connection – as a CDC member, as he already dramatically lectured, it’s his duty to do this stuff anyway. Does he need motivating with a family connection

Day 1

Back to really cold place (yes I see the personal motivation to get him there now – that place is really cold). They helicopter into the zone, all the people we’ve seen plus Dr. Doreen Boyle who Does Not Like pharmaceutical companies. Or, well anything else for that matter since she gives grief to Sergio as well – but she takes grief back as well – I think I’m going to like her.  Extra personal drama, Julia is Alan’s ex-wife and Sarah, Alan’s protégée has an epic crush on him – or so Doreen guesses (she quickly uses this knowledge to quite cruelly tease Sarah). That sounds like enough personal drama, let’s focus on the illness now… oh wait, no Alan doesn’t mention Peter or Julia because he caught them in bed together.

Oh dear.  That’s far too much romantic personal drama established in the opening minutes of the pilot. This doesn’t bode well.

They’re greeted by Daniel Aerov (head of security) and Dr. Hiroshi Hatake (head of research and the sinister guy in the beginning with the water bottle). They’re perturbed to find that Hiroshi hasn’t initiated quarantine but there’s only been three infected, all of which worked in the same lab; it hasn’t spread so no quarantine (there were only 3 people in the big room o’ bodies?)

They have ID chips implanted into their hands to give them access to the base and, ominously, the helicopter leaves because it’s too cold for it to stay. And we see how big the place is – huge – employing 121 people

They suit up (Alan and Julia having a “we still have feelings” moment and confirming that she and Peter are not together) and Alan sees Peter – the man who was given the water at the beginning of the episode. He does not look good. While they try to treat Peter, Sarah talks to Daniel learning that they only get 1 hour of satellite connection (internet connection) a day and that Daniel is Hiroshi’s adopted son. Peter is somewhat aware, says something about a “white room” and surprising Julia by having black blood – and surprises everyone by going berserk and trying to stab Alan. He yells “everyone lies” before Julia manages to sedate him.

Brief sad-music-look-how-upset-we-are scene before joining Doreen and Sergio swabbing down Peter’s lab. Daniel is very cagey about Peter’s projects and even tries to discourage Sergio checking some things – Sergio’s not impressed or willing to take the hint. Doreen also doesn’t believe Daniel’s claim that they have no monkeys, only lab rats (that has been engineered to have no sex organs).

Meanwhile, Julia, Sarah and Alan go check out the body bags of the other two victims – they’re just skeletons in bodybags full of black, viscous fluid (Sarah vomits in her face mask which is probably one of the most awful things I can imagine).