The Magicians, season 3, Episode 6: Do You Like Teeth

Alice and Julia have decided to go through with the plan to transfer magic from Julia to Alice - and Alice is almost painfully excited. They’re going to use a repurposed hedge witch spell that originally was used to steal magic.

They start  - and are interrupted by Penny who attracts their attention by possessing a singing fish.

This is not the most dignified way to communicate.

He warns them that he’s seen this before - and it killed the witches in question. But it’s also Fogg’s spell - yes Dean Henry Fogg.

He’s not doing so well - and he’s not exactly happy they’ve been keeping Julia’s magic from him but, as they point out, he’s been very drunk all the time. He doesn’t deny this or make excuses - because he’s a magicless magician, a Dean without a school, and an unemployed blind black man in an even more prejudiced America (it turns out they were using magic to “increase tolerance 38% which Henry is already scathing about and clearly unimpressed by how little tolerance that actually amounted to). In other words, Henry has plenty of reasons to be drunk.

He does tell them about the spell - and that they need the flesh of a magical creature. Specifically an incubus. Which means they go to an incubus to ask to use his penis

And I was all ready to roll my eyes because this is freaking Magicians but at least someone on the writer team decided that they’d used up their quota of forced sexual situations for the next 11 centuries and backed off. Turns out that the Incubus isn’t into sex, feeds on stress, and is happy to lend them his regrowing tail.

The Librarians, Season 4, Episode 12: Echoes of Memory

Eve is the last person who remembers the Library and desperately she constructs a memory palace in her own mind - to desperately hold on to it a long as possible.

She is the only one who remembers and she is in a whole new world - a world where the Library never existed. A world where people don’t know curiosity or imagination (yet still manage to invent cars and televisions so… yeah it’s not perfect). Everything is grey. Everyone wears white. Cafes serve fat and flour (which is bland and tasteless but would also kill everyone pretty damn quickly). Everything is dull and bland and boring and mundane. We also have lots of ominous posters about the Company which is all about thought policing, and encouraging people not to think or question: be complacent, content and obedient. It’s very 1984 but more boring.

She has her tethering ring from Flynn which prompts her to go to one of the bland televisions which is quickly possessed by Flynn: who quickly tells her to make a memory palace (and acknowledges that she’s smart enough to already have figured this out). He also reveals that he never left the Library - when Nicole came to him to ask him to run away with her, he told her no. He told her that hearing she was a prisoner of the Library reminded him that he wasn’t - that he could leave - that he stayed with the Library because he wanted to, because he loved it, because it meant everything to him (which was kind of my point about Flynn’s motivations as well, the Library is his dream always was) AND because he loves Eve.

So Nicole kidnapped him.

I have to say this makes far far far more sense with his character and motivation.

Watching the television, Eve also sees an advert with Jake on it - selling average cars known for their averageness. She, goes to him and… rather easily convinces him to join her (he doesn’t remember her to the Library but has dreamed about it). The same applies to Cassandra. I’d say it’s more than a little simple to convince them both - but they are creative geniuses living in ridiculously dull, unstimulating lives. I can see them leaping on any opportunity to get away. Especially with Eve praising their specialties.

They do raise the suspicions of the Thought Police who catch up with them when trying to recruit Ezekiel. Since Ezekiel is a television celebrity of the most boring show ever (sadly, I do remember and abysmal home video show which seemed to consist of an interminable number of people falling over to a terrible canned laughter track. Alas, I had a grandparent who unreasonably loved this appalling show). Living a life of relative luxury, Ezekiel is less willing to join (and informs us that dreams are illegal) and the Thought Police capture Eve.

They take her to an asylum where the inmates are gathered and trained to suppress imagination, wonder and curiosity. Aided by medication

Naturally the person running the Company is Nicole, who is also using an artefact to prevent her losing her memory - as such giving her the intelligence and knowledge to rule the world easily. Eve defies her… but she loses the last few crumbs of memory left to her. She loses the Library and herself.

You’d think that Nicole would be intelligent enough not to lock Eve up in the same building as Flynn (or intelligent enough to just kill Eve).

But apparently not - and Flynn, babbling, semi-coherent (more so than usual) and talking randomly talks to Eve, noticing her high levels of colour next to the monochrome of everyone else. He recognises her as coming from another world and he has a fascinating idea about how worlds are defined by their words and names because this is what we call and define everyone around us with (which is, of course, very Librarian-y). The guards take him into confinement again but not before he has an almost dance number battle with them - again, very Flynn. He remembers everything because, ultimately, he is the Librarian and his memory does not fuzz easily

Under the Pendulum Sun by Jeannette Ng

Catherine Helstone is determined to find her brother. He has been missing for some time on his mission to bring Christianity to the fae of Arcadia. She’s finally received permission to follow him

The land of Arcadia is like nothing she imagined, with mystery upon mystery to uncover and cryptic inhabitants who never seem to let her get close to the truth. Even finding her brother does little to solve the constant mystery of the castle they’re confined to, the world that is so alien and the inhabitants that do little to encourage their presence

Laon is convinced that the way to learn the truth - and bring the fae to Christianity - is to gain access to the interior. But to do that requires the favour of the alien and frightening Queen Mab.

This is not an easy book to read.

Not because it’s offensive, or badly written or otherwise broken. But because it’s intelligent, it has layers and to truly appreciate it you need to sit and think and examine and explore every line, the implications, the nuances and the thinking. A decent grounding or interest in theology wouldn’t go amiss either (which, honestly, I don’t have, but still appreciated the wrangling over holy writ and lots of awkward questions and wrangling).

The foundation for this book is less a story and more an exploration. Oh we have lots of Catherine’s journey to Arcadia, her living there and the relationship with her brother Laon (more on that later) but the main point of this is exploration and thought. What is faerie, how alien is it: and I have to say here that I have rarely read a depiction of faerie as alien, as fanciful, as weird and as downright creepy as I’ve seen here. From the nature of the individual fae, the the bizarre sun and moon to distances being measured in dreams and epiphanies to the seasons and how things change - it’s utterly perfectly alien. The use of salt on the food, the nature of changelings and Mab and her terrifying, ethereal court: the aesthetics, the theme, the whole feel of this world is excellent. It’s worth reading this book fro this alone.

And to this we add the missionaries - Laon and Catherine, so utterly out of their depth, desperately trying to apply their faith to a world that seems utterly unrelated top it, trying to find the secrets from past missionaries, trying to understand the very nature of the fae and faerie. Complete with twist at the end and excellent machinations from the fae queen

Star Trek Discovery: Season 1, Episode 15: Will You Take My Hand

Captain Evil!Georgiou is now leading the Discovery to Qo’noS and she’s not even trying to pretend to be good, she’s letting her evil flag fly; much to Michael and Saru’s concern. She even tries to taunt Saru about eating him but Saru is definitely not going to be intimidated

They need information on Qo’noS so Georgiou decides to beat up L’rell while Michael tries to appeal to her (sure the humans are winning but her and T’kuvma’s dream of a united Klingon Empire is pretty much dead - she’s losing this war too). Georgiou’s beating achieves nothing and Michaels offers a better idea: Tyler

Since Tyler has Klingon memories and is more inclined to co-operate without torture, this is a good idea. We throw in some angst about Tyler clinging to his human memories and Georgiou continues to be the worst. This is necessary this episode because Evil!Georgiou may actually be the most fun character on the show so we need to be reminded she is evil incarnate. Michael certainly seems to need it.

Tyler gives them lots of up to date information which allows them to Magic mushroom there way to a cave on Qo’noS and then send a landing team to go to the place where they need to plant the bomb

That landing team includes Georgiou, Tyler, Michael (yay angst) and Tilly. Who quickly learns that Georgiou is evil since Georgiou is doing nothing to hide who she is (and reminisces about the many Star Trek staples they’ve massacred together with evil!Tilly)

The spot they’re going to on Qo’noS has been given to the Orions. An old school Star Trek race of sexy half naked green people. No, Discovery has not looked at this depiction and decided “hey… maybe a whole species shouldn’t be depicted this way”?

So it’s time to dress as low lives (i.e. wear lots of leather. A fashion that hasn’t changed in centuries. I may own Tyler’s outfit) and go to the black market to offer lots of shiny technology for trade, eat bits of unidentified meat and try to figure out where to go. Tilly is both tough and kind of dangerous while, at the same time, also kind and comforting to Michael, recognising how hard this must be for Michael, working with Evil Georgiou

They end up in a bar/brothel where we have half-naked dancers (because this is EDGY Star Trek) and Georgiou promptly picks two to have sex with (she knew our whole universe couldn’t be boring). Hey you know what doesn’t make Star Trek’s “kill the gays” trope better? Throwing in the depraved bisexual trope! Hey remember the 50 years when Star Trek didn’t bother with LGBTQ representation? Let’s go back to that because if this is them trying, in 2018, they need to stop

After she has her fun she violently threatens both sex workers until they give her the location of the shrine where they need to plant the bomb

Meanwhile Michael and Tyler try to question random Klingons using Tyler’s knowledge (which comes with him sharing Voq’s back story with Michael about how he was an outsider and oppressed) and lots of violent klingon posturing. This hits Michael’s nerves, remembering the violent Klingon attack which killed her parents. She describes it in detail to Tyler who realises why Michael would hate all Klingons - including him

Except she doesn’t - because she looks round and sees people just trying to live the same kind of lives that anyone does anywhere (because so much of sci-fi is so damn lazy and alien species are inevitably basically humans who look a little weird so of course their cultures look basically human). This is a home. And the idea of giving the Federation targets to attack here makes her super sad.

Librarians, Season 4, Episode 11: And the Trial of One

Well, things really came to a head this episode, with the villain finally revealing herself, everyone rising up and everything kind of falling apart - in other words, a perfect pentultimate episode

The deadline for tethering has arrived. They have only 24 hours to tether someone to the Library or it uncouples from reality. Jenkins even resorts to using the very first scroll in the Library to create a temporary tether. If it isn’t tethered to a Librarian soon not only will it uncouple but it will revert to its basic purpose: protecting the artefacts within the Library. Not aiding, helping or protecting humanity - just the artefacts within its halls. Eve needs to pick someone. And it can’t be Jenkins

Damn it

But none of the Librarians are especially eager to become immortal - and they think they find a way out when Cassandra (against Jenkins orders) opens the scroll and finds a spell of picking the one true Librarian - just what they need

Of course they cast it

Of course it has unforeseen consequences

Because that “test” for the one true librarian is more a trial and by trial we mean fight to the death between the candidates - officiated by Jenkins who is possessed by the Library itself

And the untethered Library is a bastard. While Eve and the Librarians all protest that they don’t believe that the Library can be so cruel or uncaring the Library is completely dismissive of them. When Eve appeals about the Librarians, the library makes it clear it only cares about Artefacts. And Librarians are not artefacts. The Library doesn’t care about people, it’s custodian or librarians - it isn’t nice, it isn’t kind.

They are magically transported to the testing zone and Library Jenkins is wearing a magical suicide vest - they obey or Jenkins dies. Everyone is forced to go along but they still insist they’re far too loyal to each other to ever hurt each other

The Library admires loyalty. To the Library. Not to people. Because the Library is an arsehole.

Each librarian is forced to put on a ring which forces them to confront their greatest fear (Cassandra’s fear is bullies? Really? C’mon, she’s had 4 seasons of facing the worst supernatural monsters she could vanquish, she was literally terminally ill - but her fear is bullies? Can we stop infantilising her like this?). In their fears they face enemies trying to torture them - enemies that resemble the other two Librarians. They’re each set up to fight the others to escape their fears - and the only way they can do this is tom press a button which makes them forget who the other two are

Each presses a button and move to the final arena where the disembodied voice of Jenkins appeals to them to press the final button - and stop the other two. The other two Librarians who they can’t remember: and who they will kill if it means saving Jenkins

All this time Eve has been desperately trying to appeal to the Library - and each time it’s clearer and clearer that the Library is The Worst and Eve is doomed to helplessly watch the Librarians struggle and fight without being able to help them… and she realises this is her worst fear. And proving the Guardian can be as smart as a Librarian, she figures out she has been made to put on a nightmare ring as well and uses the artefacts in the library to show the truth and remove it from her finger

Now free of her nightmare, she can intervene with the Librarians who have been outbraining each other in the field. She steps in, makes them remember each other and ensures there are no Librarian deaths.

But there’s still an issue - only one Librarian can leave. And now all the Librarians volunteer to be the ones to die, each holds up the others, each is willing to sacrifice. The Librarian won’t hear it: he needs one.

Eve pulls out another Librarian-level plan and plants an artefact on Jenkins - one that should hold his suicide vest in place. They all return to the Library, apparently victorious

Supernatural, Season 13, Episode 13: Devil's Bargain

So it turns out that Castiel stabbing Lucifer with an angel blade didn’t go quite as planned. In fact, Castiel ended up half dead in a park or forest or woodland or something

Lucifer is a tough cookie to kill.

Lucifer, meanwhile, is trying to stock up on grace, apparently not having snacked on Castiel. Instead he finds a passing Cupid (who is a disgrace to humanity since he rewards a woman who willfully destroys perfectly good cake with true love rather than sending her to the worst depths of hell as she deserves), sucks him dry of grace and, duly vulnerable and human like, plunges his arm right through the man’s chest

Which is messy

But also doesn’t net Lucifer a whole lot of grace because Cupids are pretty low down the angelic totem pole. More, since Lucifer is all human like without his own grace, he’s suffering from hunger and cold and other squishy human things. Without money or super powers he resorts to begging. And fails because everyone can pretty much sense his “I want everyone to die” vibe. He does win the pity of a fellow beggar whio helpfully tells him about a faith healer who has “angel” written all over her

He goes to check her out and finds Anael, an angel who is using her angelic powers to heal - for considerable profit. Yes, she’s not the nicest of people and, upon falling along with the rest of heaven, she decided not to freak out or panic but to study humanity and do the best she could with her assets, choosing the right vessel and going into business. And she does consider herself a business woman.

She is ruthless, cold, disinclined to panic and very intelligent. So when Lucifer comes to her, she doesn’t panic - she offers him a deal. He can snack on her grace - but not all of it, not enough to kill her. He can take a little grace, let her regenerate and then take more so on so forth, guaranteeing him a nice, continuous supply to get up to full power while she doesn’t get dead - and has lots of time to ingratiate herself and almost seduce him.

She also tells her story - and it’s a nice complex one. Because back in heaven she was a very low ranked angel, she had a very boring, monotonous job and any ideas she had were just ignored because her rank was just too low. It really emphasises the whole idea of free will, lack of agency and the issue angels had - and just how little freedom they had. While most angels panicked when they fell, she rejoiced because she was free. Interestingly this doesn’t actually resonate with Lucifer as he was always about trying to please dad and failing and then resenting it more than seeking his own freedom. But it does add another angle on angeldom. Anael also feels human when her grace is drained and likes it - the ability to feel, all that hope and love. While Lucifer clearly is not a fan - not just because of all the physical sensations but also because he’s much more inclined to doubt and worry about things like being a good father when he has all these human emotions

Can we have a shenanigans here? Because the idea that angels don’t feel seems… odd. We’ve seen angels be angry, jealous, feel abandoned - and Castiel has felt just about every emotion under the sun. I think we need to expand this idea of angels feeling differently

Castiel returns to Sam and Dean, letting them know about Lucifer being back, about Mary being alive in the alternate dimension, about the evil archangel Michael’s plan to destroy everything etc etc. It’s a lot and Sam and Dean aren’t exactly thrilled with Castiel working with Lucifer but Castiel stands by his choice.

The Magicians, Season 3, Episode 5: A Life in a Day

So Penny is sort of dead but not, sort of a ghost but not and Alice decides the best thing to do is to take the key of Penny seeing to Kady. Also so she can get out of the Physical House while everything is so weird

Unfortunately Kady is… not in a good place. She can use the key to see Penny. The man whose love and death drove her to nearly kill herself with an overdose and now be shut in a mental institution. She describes herself as “broken” from trying to save Penny and she blames him for her being in there. It’s not exactly fair, but it is very human and she storms out. Penny is not happy

To make matters worse, videos of her arguing with the air did not convince the people who run the institution that she should be allowed outside - and when she tries to escape, resort to drugging her against her will. Oh I hope she gets her magic back and starts mauling people.

So that’s a trainwreck. Which is Magicians.

In Fillory, Margot is not having a great time. I mean no-one in Magicians has a great time but the women seem to get it in the neck especially (see, well, every single scene with Julia, ever. And Alice died. And while Elliot is having cruise, Margot is having to deal with the fairy queen’s ever more annoying whims. And Kady nearly died and has been imprisoned against her will).

She has her minion Trick to prepare her fairy poison because she is SO DONE WITH EVERYTHING. Except the fairy queen has decided to make things awkward again - by arranging Margot’s marriage - she quickly sends a bunny asking for help to Elliot and Quentin but, like everything else, pretty much has to deal with it herself

So the queen wants her to marry the prince of the floating mountain. Only because magic has gone, the floating mountain is no longer flying and it’s more like an island with some issues. They don’t have a lot of resources, but they do have a huge army

Margot isn’t thrilled - and nor is Prince Ess of Loria who kind of wants to know why their ally (due to his dad’s marriage with Elliot) needs this army. He and Margot also have issues over their failed marriage and history. Also Margot is as diplomatic as a sledgehammer. Also she’s in a  really bad mood. So it doesn’t go well.

The fairy queen seems to realise that Margot is 3 inches from done so introduces the Queen of the not-floating mountain people (the Stone Queen), her future mother-in-law. Who turns out to be super nice and wise and reasonable. She’s clearly in contact with the Fairy Queen and decides Margot is having a case of nerves and decides that it will help Margot to meet her son

First we have the younger son Prince Fomar who she vetoes because child! But the Stone Queen again shows some shocking reasonableness and introduces her older son, actual betrothed person and he’s super searing hot. Margot is still suspicious and she questions him to see any lurking misogyny - turns out the Stone people are matriarchal (and have a lot of sex metaphors) and he expects to be submissive and obedient to his wife. He doesn’t realise the rest of the world doesn’t work this way and Margot is happy to keep that ignorance.

Things are finally looking good - except there’s an assassination attempt on hot prince. Margot does not react well and throws Ess in prison (along with awesome burn that he isn’t even in her “top 50”) before moving on to the wedding. And this time the hot prince is murdered

Drawing Dead (Dana McIntyre Must Die #1) by S.M. Reine

Dana McIntyre has always had an issue with vampires, even more than your average vampire hunter. They have history and she holds a grudge

So she does not take being bitten and turning into a vampire well. She fully intends to die before she turns. But not before taking all of Las Vegas’s hundreds of vampires down with her.

There is a possible cure- but is Dana willing to risk that? Can Vegas survive without Dana? And can it survive her vengeance?

I am now becoming ever more intimidated and by S.M. Reine’s world - because she has written about 300 series each of which have eleventy million books in it, all of which are connected and linked to a vast meta plot and world changing activity - and I AM SO BEHIND. So finding this new series my reactions were both lots of glee and a kind of gibbering terror. I will catch up with all her books! I will!

I was going to skip this until I caught up. But the cover. You know I’m not resisting that cover, right?

That said, despite the utter terrifying vastness that is S.M. Reine’s excellent world building and the truly massive amount of events that have passed, this book still works on its own even if you’re unfamiliar with the vastness. It does refer to major events in the larger world - events I’m only vaguely aware of - but this isn’t a vast world changing story. This is the story of Dana, Las Vegas and activities there. This history matters in terms of how the supernatural took over, how people were transformed by the Event and how much changed - but the details of it are not remotely necessary to tell Dana’s story. Ok, the gods thing? The gods thing lost me. I definitely need some severe elaboration on the whole deity thing.

That doesn’t mean the world isn’t amazing and broad and rich and weird. With the very conventional supernatural vampires and wereanimals, but throwing in some truly terrifying and alien fae with a very different take on anything I’ve seen before. And the cutest orc you ever did see

In fact let’s hit Dana and her wife Penny. First of all wife - yes, Dana is a lesbian, yes we have a lesbian protagonist, no she’s not “lesbian for Penny only” she is attracted to women and definitely loves Penny. Their relationship is not in any way fairy tale - there’s a lot of conflict and difficult there: but it’s down to Penny’s previous trauma as a victim of a serial killer, it’s Dana’s obsessive hatred of vampires, it’s her drinking too much - there’s a lot of complexities which make Dana not an easy woman to live with or love but they definitely do love.