Sunday, March 15, 2015

Helix, Season 2, Episode 9: Ectogenesis

Bizarre opening – two mycotics living in stoneage domestic very-much-not-bliss fighting and arguing (though he did completely deserve to have the stew dumped on him). The stew also has an eyeball in it. Good source of protein

Day 9

Alas, Alan hasn’t been turned to stew – he’s camping out in the woods and hallucinating Doreen. Yes, Doreen’s back! It’s good to know on Helix you never have to say goodbye to a character because it’s only a matter of time before people start seeing things. She’s there to mock his complete lack of coherent goal or plan

Later she’s going to drop in on the writer’s room and do the same thing

He then wakes up and they learn that one of Winger’s men has gone missing. They find him strung up by his ankles with his eyes removed. Nasty – and seems oddly intelligent for raging mycotics. Winger tells everyone to stick together so, when someone screams, Kyle naturally stays behind. He also sees long missing child Soren, apparently missing an eye, and allows himself to be even more separated from the main group and, predictably, kidnapped.

He wakes up tied to the table in the Stoneage Mycotic house where the cook laments the lack of salt to cook with. She tries to feed him eyeball stew and when he refuses plans to cut his out but is stopped by caveman mycotic. Kyle needs fattening up first – and if there’s any doubt the remains of Leila’s body is hanging from the ceiling.

While he’s tied up Soren conveniently tells him about the “bleeding tree” that they all eat from so they don’t get sick and that the cave-mycotics ate his eye. Kyle also learns that the Mycotics eat the honey which he finds curious which rather bemuses me- I doubt they’re making health choices and they are already infected. This tidbit goes with the news Mycotics don’t eat each other because they taste bad

Winger is all for not running around the woods with killing ambushers but Alan insists because Alan. He runs into another booby trap which, alas, doesn’t kill him but does have another round of relatively pointless Doreen hallucinations.

Over to Kyle who escapes by outwitting the not-especially-witty caveman mycotics and runs, taking a jar of sap and a jar of honey with him. He doesn’t get far and is chased by the others (with bizarre music choice) so rather than run (seriously they’re a long way from him) or fight (he’s physically fit) he decides to eat the infected honey

Sweeet sweet death honey

Of course the Mycotics want to kill him anyway – but he’ rescued by Winger and her men. This makes eating the Death Honey ridiculously pointless on several levels.

At the Abbey Anne tries – and fails – to win over and reassure the broken remnant of the cult (including, alas, Olivia). Amy comes in with a much more dramatic (and inaccurate speech – including accusing Anne of sleeping with Peter) speech that wins everyone to her side, throwing away the old traditions and scapegoating Anne and anyone not from the island.

That leaves Anne alone with Peter and she reflects on how she has never had her own opinion – on how Michael just shouted her down if she ever expressed one. And so did Peter – but she shouted back and he listened to her; she felt safe enough to express her own opinion with him. She intends to fight for the Abbey. While she’s making this dramatic speech, Peter checks his phone (don’t you just hate people who do that?) and find he has a gazillion messages from Ilaria (Oubliette does not have good phone signal) who are now on the island.

Or Julia and Sergio at least, looking for Michael. They meet up with Peter and Anne and Julia explains her whole “let’s make everyone infertile so Ilaria doesn’t kill everyone” plan. Anne has reservations – not because it’s a game of choosing your flavour of genocide, but because it’s an “outside world” problem. Peter’s more than willing to help – for $100,000,000.

Time to look at some apples – without seeds. On the island the apples don’t have seeds because all apples are grafted from the original root stock (which they call “mother”). When fungus destroyed the rest of the orchard, this tree absorbed the fungus but the side effect was that men who ate its apples became infertile (fungus and apple tree? Looks like the real source of the mycotics)

But someone has stolen their apple tree! Anne seems rather excessively upset by this.

Amy and Sarah have another back and forth about immortality in which Amy threatens to kill Sarah’s baby if she doesn’t make Amy silver-eyed; Sarah is forced to try in the face of Amy’s ever scarier machinations and ramblings. And she wants it to today – so Sarah has to figure out who to allow to do a spinal tap on her. Sarah isn’t a fan of this, so messes with as plant extract (while wearing a mask – and this is the woman who didn’t wear protective gear when dealing with terrible plagues).

She tries to verbally guide Amy on how to perform a spinal tap. There are so many many reasons why this is a terrible idea. Amazingly it actually works but Amy isn’t thrilled with Sarah injecting her so instead Landry gets to volunteer first – so much for the poison. Landry is all googly eyed in love, Amy clearly isn’t. Predictably, Landry goes into convulsions and whether Sarah poisoned him or not, Amy believes she did.

Ok I get it, infected Kyle = not tasty so they won’t eat him. But can’t we reserve eating the death honey for plan c? Or plan z? If he hadn’t spent 5 minutes angsting over eating the death honey he could have just run. Honestly if I were Kyle I’d hope the death honey kills me quickly because explaining what he just did to anyone else is going to be embarrassing.

With the mycotics and Ilaria I’m immensely frustrated that Sarah and Amy are off to the side playing evil pregnancy storylines. It’s a waste of both characters. And Amy has gone from cunning and conniving leader to more than a little of an unhinged brat

I don’t really have much to say good or bad about the rest – we just seem to progress and I’m kind of sauntering along with them