Hemlock Grove is the new webseries produced by Netflix; the second series Netflix
has produced in this fashion. Despite low expectations, Netflix’s
previous webseries, was surprisingly decent - greatly raising the bar
for Hemlock Grove. We tuned in hoping for something really good.
We were disappointed. So, very very disappointed.
There
is so much to complain about regarding this show that we envisioned a full
series of posts on the myriad fails but, being a webseries, they would
quickly become irrelevant unless the worst should happen and a second
season actually be produced (gods preserve us). So we’re left with one
post on the many reasons this show became only slightly more amusing
than stabbing vinegar soaked toothpicks into our eyes.
We
are a social justice site, and there are many social justice fails we
can - and will - attack. But even before we get to them, Hemlock Grove was impressively awful even if it had perfect social justice credentials.
The acting was wooden, melodramatic and just plain awful. I rarely attack actors directly, but Bill Skarsgard has talented family, you’d think his father or brothers would give him some pointers.
The
world building was clumsy as hell, with all kinds of myriad creatures
introduced that are utterly irrelevant until the very last episode.
Letha’s angel-pregnancy, the whole Upir family, the medical experiments,
Shelly - all of it pretty irrelevant but the whole show is full of
them.
And the story is so badly written - it’s clogged with
irrelevancies that make no sense and add nothing - why did we have the
man who saw visions? What did he add to the story? Roman and Peter’s
shared dreams - was there actually a point to this or did I zone out
waiting for the actors to actually convey some emotion? And how come
this entire damn town is quite willing to believe that Peter is a
WEREWOLF but absolutely no-one bats an eye at Roman mind controlling
random people for funsies? I know Peter’s never had a friend but within
minutes of knowing Roman he’s inviting him to come witness his change?
Even the defeat of the big bad - Peter and Roman spend all series
plotting against the Vargwolf and then a random third party, randomly
appears and handles it with minimal effort?!
