Friday, August 15, 2014

The Last Ship, Season 1, Episode 8: Two Sailors Walk Into a Bar



Tex and Tom are taking on board the evil ship of the evil Russians who are evil and Tom gets to see Quincy’s family and says nice things to Eva, his daughter. Russian Admiral (ok, I’ll use his name, though that would suggest far more characterisation than he has had) Ruskov makes a big thing about how wonderful and kind he has been to Kelly and Eva and how unappreciative they have been. Ruskov tries to play nice villain, Tom responds with name, rank and serial number. Ruskov mocks the idea that the Geneva Convention still applies in a world where Geneva doesn’t even exist.

I do like one thing he mocks - Tom’s pride and need for glory. Why else would he personally lead the team to rescue Bertrise? Why indeed.

On the ship, Mike & co can’t find the Russians but think if Ruskov has Tom, he will call to trade him for Rachel and her work. Rachel is showing Betrise the science behind the vaccine (a partial explanation to illnesses she’s had in the past as well) and introduces her to Mason – one of the communication people who heard her call.

Ruskov calls and makes all the usual threats and demands. But the call does all Mike’s com’s officers to find the Russian ship. Which is twice their size – but they intend to send a rescue mission (Danny wants to lead it because he’s Big Damn Hero #2). Rachel interrupts the planning with the happy news that she has a vaccine! And she’s willing to trade that for Tom or, since all they need to do is replicate the formula, willing to trade herself. They try to talk her out of it but she knows it’s the only way to stop him.

They agree to the demands but are obviously planning more since Danny and Cosetti are going through plans of the Russian ship (which is, as they remind us, nuclear so breaking it has to be a careful affair – which requires Cosetti’s presence). Burk who fulfils some undisclosed role on the ship but seems maybe to be in charge of the armoury, gives Rachel a big gun and a suppressor to hide in her medical box. Before she goes, she asks Quincy to work on the cure. Mike even has a respectful goodbye for her

She’s taken to the Russian ship where they search her but don’t find the gun (it’s under virus samples so no-one wants to jog them too much). They take her to the admiral and the prisoners are brought up – and Rachel greets Tom with a passionate kiss. Ok, slightly unexpected so I vote for ulterior motive.

Rachel is taken to see their scientist, Neal Sorenson (he with the dodgy experiments from last episode). He’s infected, kind of – he’s the one who added the human gene to the virus – who “weaponised” it. In a way it worked – it made him completely immune to the virus. It also made him a carrier. Rachel is outraged, his tinkering is what made it so hard to actually create a vaccine – and he not only did this but then refused to come forward and admit it when there were still functioning governments. And he doesn’t even get to cure it now, because she’s already cured it. He has a tantrum when she refuses to involve him.

When Ruskov arrives with her and some men, Neal claims the vaccine won’t work without him. Roskov decides to test it by vaccinating one of his minions and put them in Neal’s isolation room.

In the prison Tom takes the note out of his mouth that Rachel planted there. It has a time and a place. Roskov wanders in to tell them about his childhood in a tiny room because we needed to throw in more Russian tropes here. He’s also there to be evil, threaten death and try to get Tom to be a loyal pet or have everyone killed. Tom is a big damn hero and says “no” while the dramatic music plays.

Throw in a random dramatic speech from Mike on the ship about getting Tom back because there are dairy farmers less cheesy than this scriptwriter.  Jeter, being Jeter, praises him. Because his job is to praise the white guy in charge.


Tom and Tex escape and fight their way through several guards (BIG DAMN HERO that’s why). They meet up with the rescue team (who also fought their way silently and without taking injury past several Russians). As they move through the ship Cosetti sets several charges. They rescue Quincy’s family and then Tom leads the rest of the men further into the ship to rescue Rachel.

The Russians know they’re there but decide not to set the alarm – Ruskov does have someone collect Rachel. She shoots him – but doesn’t managed to get the suppressor on so it’s loud. Tom and team arrive to rescue her and Tex is a little stunned that Rachel killed someone.

Cosetti sets off the explosives and Tom realises they’re rumbled so manages to psychically avoid an ambush. They get Quincy’s family to the rescue boat (need I note that Tom should have been in that group rather than leading the other?) and we have a classic firefight where, despite being outnumber, a small number of Americans, without injury, kill lots of Russians. More explosions, more angry Russians.

In all the confusion (even Ruskov has dropped his evil calm), Neal has also left his isolation cell and is now wandering around, presumably infecting people.

The good guys escape in the boat while the rest of Cosetti’s charges go up – and destroy the Russian ship (or at least severely damage it). Costti is redeemed.  So then collapses from a wound we didn’t see he had because REDEMPTION HEROISM! He dies of course.

Quincy gets to see his family again.

Lots of hero music for Tom returning – the cheese levels are now perilous to the lactose intolerant.




Can we take the evil Russian storyline as done now, then? Though I’m sure Neal is going to show up in the future – and equally sure he’s probably right about the vaccine.

Also I’m equally sure that Tom will have learned zero lessons from this and will continue to lead from the front.

Other than that – boom boom, bang bang, not much to say. Except I still don’t remember exactly what it is Cosetti did that required him to redeem himself.