Thursday, February 11, 2016

Teen Wolf, Season 5, Episode 15: Lie Ability

So, last week, Theo decided it was a greater idea to lure in Parrish the Hellhound and his fireproof shorts. This plan has a terrible flaw – his little pack of chimeras has absolutely no way of stopping Parrish. Pretty much no-one has no way of stopping a Hellhound. The crew gets badly batted around though one does manage to briefly incapacitate him: leaving Valack free to run off with Lydia

Everyone’s plan is kind of falling apart now and we get a lot of desperate teaming up. Malia and Kira team up with  and Corey to help each other: Kira needs Josh to drain out all her excess voltage while Cory needs Malia to stop his pain so he can heal from his terrible Hellhound burns (is anyone even slightly surprised that Corey is, again, the most ineffective and pointless Chimera? This show hates gay people being actual useful integral parts of the plot).

Stiles and Theo, able to get past the Mountain Ash, work together to chase after Valack through the tunnels under Eichenn House, snarking along the way about what a terrible person Theo is while tracking Lydia’s screams.

Scott and Liam want to follow but there’s that pesky Ash everywhere – so Scott decides to seek an expert: Meredith (in a catatonic state). Always ready to be a useful, sacrificing tool (she so deserves better), she has Scott stab her neck with the memory claws so he can see Lydia about to pop and scream everyone to death and that the key to that is Parrish (why this need any advice

While doing this Liam fights off several orderlies including one big guy who is supposed to be scary because he’s big never mind Liam being a werewolf. Well, we have to give the werepuppy something to do.

Parrish can’t just yell “flame on” and charge into action – but a little homespun flamethrower and he’s good to go. Among the many many things that don’t stop a Hellhound we can also add Mountain Ash.

Valack has Lydia because he wants her to use her super scream to discern the name of the Beast so they can catch him while he’s still a teenager – and not transformed into his full and deadly power. He wants to do this by making her wear a Dread Doctor’s mask which tends to kill people – which is a bad idea. He misjudges Lydia’s screams though and ends up with his head rather gruesomely squished by banshee decibels – bye bye Valack.

Parrish arrives in time to smother the next nuclear scream with his body even if it makes him flame down and he, Stiles and Theo join the main gang for the escape

How do they escape Eichenn house on lockdown? Well Mason is supposed to take out the power. Of course that would mean a gay man actually doing something and being useful to the plot which, as we’ve already seen, isn’t exactly something this series is a fan of

So let’s turn to Hayden who was left behind because Theo doesn’t trust her – as proof of that lack of trust we have a flashback to Hayden and Liam having sex. Ok… can we… not. Look I know TV is full of 20 and 30 year olds pretending to be teenagers and Victoria Moroles who plays Hayden is 19. But Dylan Sprayberry who plays Liam is actually 17 (just – and probably why the show hasn’t shown off his body nearly as much as many of the other cast). Back it up there Teen Wolf, let the other guys get naked more (or get rid of Parrish’s asbestos shorts!)

Anyway Hayden has been left guarding Deucalion who nicely manipulates her into going to help (but only after drugging him with Kanima venom). She arrives in time to find Mason being ineffective and quickly steps in to save the day

Everyone manages to get out, with occasional ear-drum shattering screams – except Tracy decides to make one last play to capture Lydia and is stopped by – Natalie with a taser! Yes, Natalie has joined team sensible!

Everyone quickly runs Lydia to Deaton, with her unleashing killer screams all over until Deaton doses her with mistletoe (I think he just grabs things at random). There’s a terrible, terrible, terrible tense moment when I actually thought Lydia was dead. I almost thought she was. I even began to type my scathing condemnation. So, well done Teen Wolf, you got me! She lives and the Pack is now officially back!
She praises Stiles for saving her… well… I guess it was his plan.

Theo’s plans have been a bit scuppered, but being truly evil he’s decided to keep the killer Dread Doctor mask.

Now it’s time to see what the Pack can do with it all back together.