Time to return to the big bads - the veiled ghostly women who have possessed Mercedes and her sister and got Tucker The Worst to run around and do their bidding in exchange for “a girl”
These are known as “the Widows” and they want to break those seals and unleash evilness.
The problem for them is finding the last seals which aren’t where they should be any more since Bobo moved them (one goes into a church and ends up killing a priest looking for it) and they’re working to a time line: they’ve only got so long to find the seals. They also reference their husband (one man) who gives them gifts, Constance the Stone Witch (who Doc killed) and Juan Carlo so ALL THE STORYLINES
Ultimately they need more time. To that end they send Tucker with a gun and a magic-immunity charm to an old man called Hypnose who is being tended by his daughter Poppy
To the main gang!
Wynonna is pregnant as we found out last episode. And Waverley and her are pegging Doc as the father which is a bit of an issue with Dolls coming back and the big romance brewing there. Wynonna and Doc had a great friends-with-benefits-maybe-more thing going on but she and Dolls had the love-you-hate-you-drama-will-they-won’t-they which is Tvlandia’s ULTIMATE ROMANCE.
Waverley hovers around fluffing and fussing about not drinking caffein and generally threatening to reveal the secret to all and complaining that it’s not fair to Doc and Dolls not to tell them to which Wynonna has this line:
“Tough shit. It’s my decision who to tell and when and it’s my situation and no-one gets to decide how to handle it by me. Stop pushing me and stop judging me.”
ALL HAIL WYNONNA
Waverley backs off, acknowledging her issues. SHe has issues with Nicole anyway as Nicole is unsure how much of their relationship was tentacle demon and not - Waverley reinforces them and they have make up sex. And while they don’t show sex, this tv series is increasingly not flinching away from Waverley and Nicole’s affection
Dolls and Doc catch up with Dolls’ ex boss to figure out what has happened to Black Badge- apparently Black badge was never a government agency, doesn’t want to spend resources on a fight they can’t win, has utterly written off the ghost river triangle and is pulling out. They do give Dolls a picture of one of the Widows so he knows what he’s facing
Ok, I don’t know how far the writers have followed this through, but this implies that we’re not facing a world ending threat or a major country devastating threat or clearly more widespread: if there was then the idea of “not being worth the investment” would be ridiculous.
They return to explain this to everyone and everyone questions what this means. I’m here for Jeremy asking “wait, are we fired, do I get a reference, who pays us” sadly no-one answers this question but it’s a point. Who is paying the bills? Money and livelihood matter guys!
Wynonna shuts down speculation with “hey I have a gun and kill monsters, so let’s do this!”
So world building addressed, we have a Widow kill a priest and a blood stained nun come to the police station to say
“My boss was killed”
To which Wynonna replies without missing a beat:
“God really is dead”.
If you didn’t laugh you’re… probably a better person than me.
Anyway this leads the gang to realise that the seal is on consecrated ground so Jeremy does the research thing. While he does that Wynonna goes to a coffee shop with Dolls on a sortadate and Dolls is clearly trying to take their relationship to the next level and she’s all awkward because of the pregnancy
And then everyone faints and falls asleep. Originally I thought it was Wynonna and the pregnancy, but when the Peacemaker wakes her up it turns out it’s everyone. She wakes up Dolls and they head to wake up Waverley and Nicole, all downing energy drinks to try and fight the supernatural sleep and using illegal pharmaceuticals (which is AWKWARD for Wynonna because pregnancy)
They’ve als been pregnant for some time because Wynonna is now visibly showing an advanced pregnancy. Brainstorming they decide to leave everyone asleep so they can search the town and see what is behind it - since it must take a lot of energy. Waverley goes to the inn to wake Doc (naked in bed with Rosita: she says she’s too young for him. He points out he’s older than the state of Colorado - everyone’s too young for him. Point).
At team, evil the Widows are still threatening Poppy to make Hypnose co-operate (so they can search the town uninterfered with) but he doesn’t have much left in him and he can’t put the heir to sleep because she’s too powerful. Seems the Widows have done no research on the heir - oopsie. He advises they run. Of course they don’t
They do attack Wynonna and steal Jeremy’s book to find where the second seal is - under the bar.
Wynonna isn’t hurt but Dolls does find out she’s pregnant -he tries an initial “wrap in bubble-wrap” tactic which she isn’t having. She’s pregnant but still demon killer
She and Dolls go to Hypnose (who Dolls realises is a sandman) and recognise his woo-woo - he tells them he’s working under duress, the Widows have his daughter - also that there are three seals total so destroying one won’t do a lot. He demands they save Poppy and if they kill him everyone currently asleep will die. Thankfully for them Nicole has been illegally tracking Tucker’s phone because he’s the creepiest person ever and they catch him trying to make Poppy dress up like Waverley so he can molest her. This guy literally cannot get creepier. When he holds Poppy at kniftpoint Nicole shoots him and he jumps out a window rather than face the Widows. Bye Tucker, you will not be missed
At the bar, Jeremy, Doc and Waverley face the Widows coming for the seal… and fail kind of badly. For a second it looks like Jeremy is going to achieve something but, nope, not happening, the widows go to town on the seal - I’m not sure if they succeed.
Wynonna, after sharing a passionate kiss with Dolls, arrives and saves the day, wounding one of the Widows. And revealing to Doc she’s pregnant
At which point everyone wakes up - and no time has moved. Apparently Hypnose puts people in a dreamscape but no time passes - except for Wynonna because she has a woo-woo baby
Wynonna is willing to let Hypnose live as he acted under duress - but Dolls screams at her to kill him because he’s a powerful demon and can be used against them. She does - and they have more of a screaming match. Tellingly Dolls says “I’m being the boss” basically because there’s a barrier to them having a relationship (apparently) he decides to pout and be hard-arse dictatorial boss instead.
This is not going to be fun
What is fun is Waverley ensuring both Dolls and Doc give Wynonna space to make her own decisions and deal with this on her own without input she doesn’t want
Wynonna is just feeling cursed - she uses 2 kinds of birth control yet still got pregnant. She puts this down to the Earp curse, forcing her again to be something she doesn’t want to be
I also note that the time shifting episode has likely circumvented any possibility of an abortion storyline which is typical of convenient TVlandia - they will do ANYTHING to avoid an awkward abortion storyline
To the Widows - Mercedes is injured, Tucker is gone and someone delivers the Bone Witch’s head to their door. It isn’t looking great for them.