So last week we had random side plot pulled out of the arse of nowhere had the Iron Witch’s long lost sister appear from nowhere to use a demonic hockey trophy to put Doc down a well and make Wynonna disappear.
Yes. Did I mention there’s like 2 episodes left? Because? So I guess forgive the half-assedness that follows?
Firstly I’m going to jump past the “let’s show the ending at the beginning” nonsense.
So, Doc, because he touched the trophy at the time the Iron Witch #2 used it, he ended up zapped into a well. Because he has a thing about wells after being stuck down one for millennia. So he’s in his personal hell stuck down a well for a couple of hours before a revenant points out there’s actually a ladder
No. Really. A ladder. Remember that half-assed stuff I mentioned?
Doc is the only one who can remember Wynonna exists and finds that the world is a little different without the Earp heir. For one thing, he’s now leading the Revenants on their little rampage, and they’ve set up base at the Earp Homestead. He has also chained up Rosita to manufacture drugs for him (he releases her. She hates him) and is no. 1 on the local law enforcement’s hit list after killing Sheriff Nedry.
Since Nedry is awesome, I can understand that
That police force is Sheriff Nicole Haught who is dealing with way more supernatural nastiness AND missing pets. We also have Dolls (now sporting a scar on his face from a previous encounter with Doc. He is not Doc’s number 1 fan). And Jeremy. Who is still Jeremy.
This is awkward because he really needs people to believe him but he’s public enemy #1. Dolls ends up locking him up in a cell with Mercedes (after Nicole knocks him out) one of the captured widows (who they happen to have locked up and she’s in a bad shape so she has no poison at least). Mercedes at least is ware they’re sort of in an alternate realm.
Nicole is also not in a relationship with Waverley, Waverley was brought up not an Earp and is now going to marry recently introduced guy Perry (though she keeps getting cold feet). She and Nicole clearly still have a thing and the spell is fraying because Nicole knows waaaaay more about Waverley than she should. Similarly some of the privacy issues she has with Nicole are spilling over into her relationship with Perry.
He does figure out who killed Waverley’s parents (which is a little different in this reality) and finds Bobo - in a mental institution. I won’t speculate exactly how anyone managed to imprison a revenant as powerful as Bobo or hold him in a perfectly normal institution without woo-woo. He rambles a lot about Waverley, angels and not killing her. Which is nice. I guess.
While Mercedes is imprisoned, fellow Widow Beth is trying to raise their evil husband but, alas for her, can’t do it alone which is a problem because Mercedes is imprisoned AND they hate each other.
This leads to an attack on Black Badge, Mercedes and Beth hating each other but leaving and Doc being freed since the only guard is Jeremy who is, still, Jeremy. He’s also easily convinced they’re in an alternate reality because he’s Jeremy. But also because he pokes his memories and without Wynonna and a lot of shenanigans there’s absolutely no reason he would have been assigned to the arse end of nowhere and there’s no way anyone would go to Purgatory voluntarily.
Also Doc gives him his hate and he is, after all, Jeremy.
Doc goes from here to the bar for reasons, possibly to recruit Waverley which may almost work but Dolls arrives. Telling Dolls he knows he turns into a dragon doesn’t help to convince anyone and Doc ends up having to shoot Dolls - reminding us that Doc is, no matter what else, the fastest draw in the west. Except he also assumes Dolls wears his body armour which apparently he doesn’t in this reality. So Dolls is now shot and dying. Waverley then shoots Doc in the back with a shotgun and he is now dying. Which is slightly weird because Waverley then rushes to the guy she just shot to be all upset that he’s dying. He does tell her to go see the Iron witch
Nicole completely accepts the idea that the Iron witch exists because the town is full of supernatural stuff which no-one ever says aloud. That’s some quality 4th wall poking
It is explained though in that this spell is kind of stretching - as the Iron Witch explains. Changing reality this much is rather beyond the hockey trophy demon and it’s basically a glamour which is fraying at the edges. So Dolls, dying before Jeremy, doesn’t feel happy he killed archfoe Doc, but feels like he’s killed a friend. Nicole and Waverley still feel a major connection. And Waverley feels kind of sad about shooting Doc.
The Iron Witch is also not happy with this reality. Turns out she did this not for revenge but because she thought if Wynonna weren’t around then maybe her sister would never have been killed. Apparently not for Reasons. She’s also willing to cast a quick spell so Waverley and Nicole can remember reality as it should be and realise that their job now is to find the hockey trophy and destroy it
This trophy is in the meth-lab barn on the homestead surrounded by revenants because… because… no I have no clue. I have no damn clue why this trophy would be in Rosita’s meth lab. It just is because half assed.
They recruit and rescue Bobo who happens to duplicate his wardrobe and be useful. Though he can’t help them reset the wards on the homestead because that involves digging and Purgatory is perpetually frozen. But his mere presence causes a Revenant civil war as Doc loyalists and Bobo loyalists start killing each other allowing Nicole, Jeremy, Rosita (undercover Black Badge agent… apparently) and Waverley to reach the meth lab, find the hockey demon trophy (which sounds like a cheesy Canadian horror movie) and…
And suddenly realise they have no idea what to do and are 10 seconds aware from Revenant death. Unless they can destroy the trophy with fire. Thankfully meth labs are explosive. Of course it does mean they’re embracing near certain death but death by fireball may be better than death by Revenant torture
It works! The spell is broken and everyone else lives but they get 70s - 80s hair. Who knew that meth would give you 70s hair? Honestly I think we’ve found the best anti-drug PSA ever.
Unfortunately the Widows have found Bobo because they want him to point out where Clootie is - and he knows. He’s also willing to share because Clootie has the mojo to stop him going back to hell again - which is something all Revenants would like to avoid since the Earp curse means going to hell over and over and over again.
He also has to mojo to break the third seal which neither the Widows do… so which side Bobo decides to come down on is going to be the question since he’s a major power player
This is when Wynonna returns, all three seals broken, Bobo back - and she’s going into labour
Honestly this whole plot line is weirdly inserted and then not actually thought through