Under Attack (Under World Detective Agency Chronicles #2) by Hannah Jayne

Sophie’s life is going miserably – what with a shakeup at work forcing her to find new employment and creating a rift between her and Mina

And into this comes Alex, the Fallen Angel, looking for the Vessel of Souls which is mega shiny and powerful and vital. He needs it now because Ophelia, also Fallen Angel only much much much more evil is looking for the vessel.

That’s a quest that puts Sophie firmly in the middle – and directly under threat. Especially as we learn more about exactly who Sophie is and who her family are.

I think this book improved on a few elements of the first one…

…and lo it was damned with the very faintest of praise. Especially since it was even worse with some others.

Many of the problems of the first book continue – one of the most annoying is that it’s still like that guy at the pub who thinks he’s funny but really isn’t. There is so much of this book that is hammered in for comic relief that isn’t even slightly amusing – Vlad and Nina’s main purposes is to be a constant source of hilarity which I’m sure is meant to have me cracking up and falling from my chair. I did not crack a smile – and find both characters so ridiculous to the point of being intensely irritated whenever they appear. And now they’re joined by pointless-cantaloupe-grandma-ghost. No, that isn’t a typo. No, it isn’t funny.

This book is also rammed with pointlessness and “twists” that I neither understand nor care about. They just fill space – and this is a flaw that is even worse than the first book. Sophie had work trouble – added nothing to the story. Changed job – added nothing to the story. Sophie’s sister – nothing added to the story, nothing about the story changed. Sophie’s father – not followed up enough to make it relevant to the story. Ghostly grandma – added nothing to the story – not even clumsy exposition. Will the Guardian… who doesn’t do much guarding. There’s just all of this stuff crammed into the book that doesn’t really do anything – and it’s not just these elements added, there are a lot of scenes as well. Like Sophie deciding to go to her boss and give him a piece of her mind – it doesn’t DO anything, she doesn’t even really see it through. Or Alex giving Sophie a stun gun – we have a whole scene about it but there’s no real reason for it. Or Sophie being arrested to then have that whole plot line pointlessly fizzle into nothing. This book is lost in Chekhov’s junkshop.

Which is another element that fails dismally – Sophie is supposed to being tormented by Ophelia through telepathy. But she never sees anything through! So the arrest… fizzles out. Her food being made disgusting… only happens once. The rest of the time it can be summed up with “Ophelia’s being mean” which is apparently sufficient to turn Sophie into a snivelling wreck of weepiness and despair.

Fangs for the Fantasy Book of the Week

It's another Monday which means it's time for our next podcast - episode 4 of 2014 where we will talk about all of the shows we've been following this week (or as many as we can get to), our book of the week and whether Renee manages to carve through the permafrost to her home or not - all through our social justice lens. Feel free to join us, listen, ask questions or make suggestions

Like all  the Fangs for the Fantasy podcasts (archives here) we read a book and discuss it on the show. 

To give people a chance to read along with us, especially over the holidays, we include a list of our planned books of the week for the next few shows, so people can get the books, read them and join in the conversation.

 Our podcast will be at 7:00pm EST tonight 

27th January - 3rd February: Under Attack by Hannah Jayne

3rd February - 10th February: Wild Things by Chloe Neil

10th February - 17th February: Faefever by Karen Marie Moning

17th February - 24th February: Blood Passage by Connie Suttle

24th February - 3rd March: Undead Pool by Kim Harrison

The Walking Dead: Just Another Day at the Office (The Governor Series #1.5) by Jay Bonansinga

The Walking Dead: Just Another Day at the Office, basically details the big zombie battle which secured Philip's position as head of the Woodbury crew.  There is no character development and for that matter very little interaction between the characters themselves.  The so-called short story only amounts to about 25% of the novel and the rest is a preview of the novel The Road to Woodbury.  If you have already read The Road to Woodbury there is absolutely no reason to read this book.  It doesn't add anything to cannon whatsoever. Calling The Walking Dead: Just Another Day at the Office a novella is an absolute insult to this category because there is no story.

Though  The Walking Dead: Just Another Day at the Office, is only listed at 99 cents on Amazon, it's hard not to feel cheated at this point.  This is not the first time that Bonansinga and Kirkman have come together to abuse the trust of their fan base for a profit (see: Fall of The Governor).  In many ways they are giving George Lucas a run in the effort to squeeze every last drop of profit a series. When one busy a product, we expect something new, exciting and substantial not a re hash of old storylines or completely irrelevant nonsense that adds nothing to the story arc.

Consider this review a public service announcement.  Even at the low cost of a dollar, this novella is not worth the money.  The so-called short story can be read in about five minutes.  What little story there is, is completely with forgettable.  Not only will The Walking Dead: Just Another Day at the Office, rob your wallet, it will waste precious time in your life. It makes me wonder if Bonansinga and Kirkman realise that there are only so many times they can ask people to drink from the same stagnant well before they begin to rebel.  Most don't mind supporting a series that continues to grow and entertain but it is another thing to be peddled the same story repeatedly just wrapped in a different bow. At this point, I leave you with the words, buyer beware.

Helix, Season 1, Episode 5: The White Room

Day 5

Sergio burns the frozen monkeys. He’s happy about this because he’s completed his mission – he sends a message to shadowy people unknown to tell them he’s all done and they can evacuate any time now, thanks. He gets a message back telling him there’s just a little delay while they find and retrieve “Dr. Hvit”. Last we heard that name was when Tracy was ranting about him being forced into the White Room. Anyway, that’s Sergio’s new mission and he doesn’t even know who Dr. Hvit is.

Sergio, your bosses be screwing with you. Their next mission is to bring them a shrubbery. And just in case things aren’t creepy enough, the frozen burning monkeys start screaming. They weren’t dead.

Alan does science and the cameraman goes for some overediting to convince us this is exciting – he’s done some sciency stuff to Dr. Phillipe Duchamp’s super cure that promises progress – once they do some animal testing anyway. With this, Alan is confident they can open up the lower quarantine level and check if people are actually infected (given that Sarah’s little test is not great). Time to go cross swords with Daniel as a way of crossing swords with Hiroshi because Alan has to remind us who the alpha male round here is.

Meanwhile Sarah is still harbouring a Vector (Rae Van Eigem) to keep her cancer secret – and no, this makes zero sense and must be professionally dubious to say the least. They do get to have poignant conversations about controlling pain and seeing death approach though.

Sergio’s turn to play Alpha posturing with Daniel and attacks his adoption by Hiroshi, making a comparison with central and south American gangs who take in young kids to indoctrinate them, make them loyal without them realising that they’re grunts. Daniel is not impressed

While Hiroshi is elsewhere stabbing himself in the back. No, really.

In the quarantine area, Julia is trying to convince the people locked in to let her in as well – but her coughing doesn’t reassure them even if she does have food and Jaye just wants them out of the corridors where the Vectors roam and accuses Julia of trying to rejoin the main group because she doesn’t want to confront her own mysterious handwritten graffiti. She has no idea why it was there (and tries to cling to the idea it was a hallucination) and is slightly freaked when Jaye calls her “Jules” since only Alan and her mother called her that. Which is when a bleeding Hirshi staggers round the corner

Really man, did you just stab yourself to make Julia play Florence Nightingale? With zombies?

Hiroshi blames the guys who shut off the CO2 scrubbers for his injury – but he may have to be moved half way across the facility to get some decent treatment for his injury. Relatedly, it’s pretty clear Hiroshi can’t see Jaye – and she’s actually just Julia’s hallucination/imaginary friend/pet spirit. While imaginary friend Jaye doesn’t like Hiroshi, Julia is happy to crawl through a tunnel across the base to seek out first aid

Being Human US - Sneak Peak and BTS

Something to prime us all for Monday

Sneak peak:




And some interview clips:

Vampire Diaries, Season 5, Episode 12: The Devil Inside

Katherine, who isn’t really dead, is hitching a ride in Elena’s mind – though Nadia lets it slip that it’s not permanent – and she compels Matt to give her a crash course in all things Elena – including how she broke up with him.

Alas, we have to deal with that most annoying of tropes (beyond Elena’s continued existence) the “earlier that day” sign. Because, apparently, telling a story in chronological order is considered passé these days.

Anyway, earlier that day Nadia chained up Katherine in case Elena made a re-appearance while she went to take the Travellers Katherine’s corpse which they want for ill defined reasons that are probably nefarious.

Switch to Damon who has already buried Katherine’s body (rather jauntily) and Nadia is not pleased – using the excuse that Katherine wanted to be buried in Bulgaria with her family. Damon’s going to deny this request simply because he’s that petty.

Tyler is camping with Matt and apparently he’s willing to put aside everything that happened in New Orleans (probably because everything that happened in New Orleans involved Klaus and Elijah sending him home)

At college – yes we are pretending the college storylines are still going – Aaron (who is not dead) drops in on Caroline to tell her and Elena that he’s cutting off all funding to the evil Augustine vampire torture lab. Aaron leaves – and Enzo (the imprisoned vampire made of Sexy) drops in to have a little chat with him.

Stefan calls Caroline to babble about Damon and Elena and basically trying to get them back together and yeah that’s bewildering since Stefan and Caroline are the two people who least want Damon and Elena to be a happy couple. Anyway, they both realise Elena is missing.

Katherine gets frustrated by her phone eternally ringing when her eyes turn black and Elena returns (BOOOOOOO!) to find she’s chained to the headboard. Which was a nice idea on Nadia’s part but neglected the fact that hotel headboards aren’t usually vampire proof.

Meanwhile Stefan and Caroline (hereby called “Prudy Trudy” by Damon) talk to Damon about their intention to win him Elena back – which he doesn’t believe either.

Katherine gets more and more annoyed at her phone and Nadia notes they need Katherine’s body so maybe Katherine should go to the weekly party and ask questions about where Katherine’s body is buried. Nadia disagrees – and points out that Katherine actually knows very little about Elena – so it’s time to question Matt

What Fangs for the Fantasy Expects from Authors We Review

So, looking round Twitter and following the links of the long suffering keeper of certain drunken, piratical Australians, we’ve seen something else looming on the horizon - namely a post on what one book blogger expects - or would like - from authors.

Well, everyone wants different things and the glory of the internet is we can all do things differently - but we have a rather different approach ourselves.

So in light of this, what do we, at Fangs, expect from authors who pass books to us for review? Let me write you a list:

...

..

.

That would be nothing. Actually we expect patience because there’s no way we’re going to get to it any time soon, but GENERALLY nothing

You don’t have to tweet the review, share it, like it, upvote it or even read it. We’re very much in the camp of “reviews are for readers, not authors.” In fact, if you submit a book for review, we probably won’t even email you to let you know the review has been written (admittedly from laziness as much as anything).

If authors wish to share our reviews, fair enough. But we won’t encourage that, praise that or even express public happiness about that - in fact, there’s a good chance we won’t even notice. In fact, I’ll even go further than that - despite our fanpoodling of authors we love, author opinion/support/attention is something we deliberately try to be indifferent about.

Whether you love us or loathe us, ignore us or pay attention to our every innocuous word, share our views or denounce us to hell and back - it doesn’t matter. Here is what matters:

You give us a book

We give you an honest review (eventually).

End of. Whether you love us, loathe us, worship us or denounce us, ignore us or stalk us are all irrelevant to that fact and we try to keep it that way; because the honesty of our reviews are paramount.

That doesn’t mean we don’t love our authors. We do - we can fanpoodle with the best of them: but that fanpoodling comes after the reviews - and we at least like to think that even with authors we’ve loved and interviewed (and we, in general, are not in the habit of interviewing authors we don’t adore) that we can still be critical in reviews and even the interviews.

By not expecting - or caring - whether authors share/like/promote our reviews this means we don’t expect or hope for anything from authors. Which means they  can’t offer us anything that would sway us and we don’t WANT to be in a position where they COULD offer us something - even something as innocuous as a facebook like or goodreads recommend.

We never want the perception that a review can be “bought”, even if it were for something as innocuous as a like, a link or a reblog. Even the perception of selling reviews can compromise your integrity

Authors, we expect nothing from you expect books - sometimes awesome, fanpoodly books (and to start the Prinny punk genre, with chickens. And to continue to be awesome. And to not mind us stalking outside your window crying that the next book isn’t out yet.) In turn, you can expect nothing from us except honest reviews - sometimes snarky, highly critical reviews.

Just to be abundantly clear here - we do NOT work on a quid pro quo system and we are not in the business of promoting authors, ever. We’re reviewers, not advertisers or a publisher’s marketing department

As for reviewers who want to be noticed and drive traffic to their site - well, I can’t say we’re any kind of experts but I think the most successful way to promote your site isn’t requiring people to spam on your behalf (or tweeting the same stuff daily). It’s always about a) producing decent content and b) getting involved in the community - go to other book blogs, comment, offer guest posts, interact - become known; it’s the only sure method. You become known in the community by joining and being active in that community

Cold Iron by D.L.McDermott

Beth is an archaeologist, struggling to make her own name when so much of her work – including her very unusual, even supernatural, ability to find dig sites are credited to her far-from-pleasant ex-husband. One of those finds leads her to a mound in Ireland – and a being that she releases.

Normally, dealing with her ex-husband’s theft of artefacts and attempts to frame her would be her main concern – but Conn, the ancient fae warrior, is seeking not just his sword, but Beth herself. The mortal woman has caught his eye and his fancy – and the fae never accept no for an answer.

But these new explorations have revealed a side of Beth she has long ignored – and could have implications for all of the fae, and the world beside.

This book had some strong positive ticks. The world building is solid, there has been some research or familiarity with old Irish myths and legends, we have some nice shout outs to mythology and mythological figures and a definite knowledge to some of the old tales which I really appreciated.

On top of that has been some very solid world building with some nice intriguing, interesting twists – particularly the druids and how they interact with the fae and their history. It’s novel, it’s original, it’s interesting and it has a lot of depth for exploration and nuance and potential conflict, I like it.

The fae are also presented in a way that is suitably alien and scary – and not in any way twee or shiny or friendly as well; scary fae are always good to read about.

The characterisation is pretty solid when it comes to Beth – she’s a character with a full, involved history, motivation and depth that has really created a character with a lot of depth behind her that reflects on her actions and thoughts really well. She’s a strong character, a fully fleshed character. Conn is much less so – he’s beautiful with a layer of angst for characterisation. His growth and evolution would be an interesting element to him but it’s pretty simplistic and expected – he’s not a bad character, he’s just not an amazing one either

One rather curious aspect of this book was the romance. It kept reaching the very edge of holding up some of the most awful tropes – and I was ready to tear it into little shreds – then twist right away from it with a subversion. The fae are, as I mentioned, not nice people in this book – at very least they’re arrogant, predatory and pretty lacking in anything resembling compassion and they have a vast sense of entitlement. Which means, when it comes to humans they find attractive, they don’t ask and they don’t care about consent.