Saturday, October 26, 2013

Haven, Season 4, Episode 6: Countdown

Big revelation last episode – Audrey knows she’s really Audrey! She’s been faking Lexi – so time for some meaty meta, right?

Right? Hah, I live in hope.

We have a man who is killed – and seemingly drained or faded – by a travel agent’s advertising board. And they say foreign travel is good for you.

Duke and Audrey confirm again that Audrey is Audrey and spell out that Audrey was pretending so no-one would force her to kill Nathan (in case you missed that part, it being merely blatantly obvious. Haven doesn’t have the highest respect for their viewers intelligence). Audrey finds it really easy to play Lexi because unlike her other past incarnations, she remembers Lexi (and some of Lexi is bleeding over into Audrey with her mannerisms and turns of phrase). Now they both have to make sure Nathan doesn’t find out since he’s got all that guilty-self-sacrifice thing going.

Which is when he arrives, Audrey slips back into Lexiness and there’s awkwardness all round. Duke and Audrey make up a terrible excuse to keep Audrey and Nathan apart – which means Duke now has to follow Nathan around to protect Nathan from the Guard.

Speaking of, Jordan the-oh-gods-can-someone’s-trouble-accidentally-kill-her-already is on Duke’s boat with Duke’s big brother Wade for lots of flirting that can’t go anywhere (he’s still willing to try for a kiss from the woman whose touch brings bowel-loosening, consciousness-killing agony. Which shows that however silly Duke’s ideas are, he still got all the brains in the family. She wants to tell Wade how he is the solution to ending the Troubles and that Audrey is the problem.

Yes Jordan is really buying into this whole “let’s get Wade to kill Audrey and see if that ends the Troubles.”

Vince angrily confronts Jordan – she doesn’t understand what she’s messing with and, no, nor does he but he does better than her. He still can’t face Audrey killing Nathan however. He tells her her plan won’t work – and she uses her power on him. She’s determined to try.

Nathan and Duke meet up with Gloria, the ME who worked with Nathan’s dad who has been brought out of retirement in these newly Troubled times. She’s kick arse and awesome. She’s quit unsurprised by Seth, the victim, getting rigor mortis before dying, his cells going bonkers (“it’s a medical term”). She also doubts Duke’s presence since she bought weed from him and her intern is Vicki who does the deadly drawings back in season 1 (Gloria keeps her away from the paperwork).

Duke likes Gloria. I think she’s awesome and better be a regular character. They do learn from Rebecca, the cop doing the questioning that the victim apparently received text messages he didn’t like. Rebecca also finds that Seth was carrying documentation for a new private school, Stillwater School – a school she’s heard of that only allows in “clean” (non-Troubled) children. Talking around she finds out that there was a meeting planned that Seth was getting supplies for trying to get parents to commit to sending their children to the new school.

We also have a cop called off another case to investigate the phone sending killer texts – a phone that wasn’t connected to anyone at the time of death. The victim of the previous crime is less-than-amused that a Troubled crime scene takes precedence over his robbery. The cop, Tater, is even less pleased because he becomes the next victim while holding the phone, even though the phone is off. But the rigored Tator is actually looking at the computer read out on his bike – which also received texts. Nathan has Rebecca pass on the word not to use phones.

Nathan gets a call from Audrey and, again, convinces her to stay at the police station and help from there even though she’s eager to get involved. And Wade comes to the same station, ostensibly to get a permit to hold a firework’s display. He takes the chance to meet Audrey – and to leave his pen/secret recording device he just picked up on her desk (presumably at Jordan’s insistence).

Duke and Nathan head to the Stillwater school meeting but on the way Nathan asks about Duke and Jennifer and raises the lion in the room – last season, outside the barn, Duke said he loved Audrey. Nathan isn’t playing jealous, he’s just happy someone will look after “Lexi” when he’s dead and the Troubles are over. They meet the guy who is running the school and he is bemused because his phone, computer and watch all start counting down to zero (which Nathan and Duke can’t see). For some reason Nathan and Duke just stand there and watch while the man counts down from 5 – and then becomes the next victim. What did they think would happen when it reached zero? People would leap out of the side rooms and yell “HAPPY BIRTHDAY?!”

They set Rebecca to guard the room and send the people attending the meeting home – and she reveals that her son’s tennis match can’t go ahead because the coach thinks the scoreboard is broken. Her son thinks it’s fine – but the coach keeps seeing it counting down.

They go to see the coach and he sees both the scoreboard and Nathan’s phone counting down from 10 minutes.  Every digital display he sees shows the same countdown.

Jordan has Vince tied to a chair and Vince again tries to convince her to stop – by telling her how desperate he once was to end the Troubles. In 1981, before Lucy (a previous Audrey) arrived, the Troubles came back. Vince’s wife’s family had a terrible, agonising, horrific Trouble so to spare his wife he activated Simon Crocker (Duke’s father) with his own blood and had him kill Vince’s father in law, purging the Trouble from that family line. Later he and Lucy had to kill Simon. His desperation to prevent his wife becoming a monster drove him to become a monster instead. And now Jordan is doing the same.

Despite her angsty facial impressions, she continues with her plan and Wade shows her all the spy equipment he’s installed. (I actually think a camera pen is a terrible idea –people will put it away). After playing a bit with Jordan’s rubber glove, she doles out some more information – Wade because powerful when he gets Troubled blood on him (talk about partial information) but then they see all kinds of drama happening at the police station

They bring in the coach (past the angry guy who was robbed in the waiting room and thinks they’re favouring Troubled people) and get him in a room where he can’t see any count downs (Audrey can – she can see the countdowns even when it’s not directed at her). But when it reaches zero, the coach still dies. Audrey sees the countdown start again at 15 minutes as soon as the Coach is dead – like the Trouble is working down a list. And this time it’s Nathan who can see the dial, the next victim. For extra angst, Nathan says how much he wishes “Lexi” were Audrey.

At the other end of the camera, Jordan notices the clock vibrate when Krebbs, the man who was robbed, lost his temper in the waiting room. He’s the Troubled guy.

Back to Audrey, she has made one of her patented leaps of logic to come to the same conclusion. Krebbs was robbed and the robber told him to stay still and count to a thousand when he finished the robbery. 1,000 is about 15 minutes – and the Coach went to his shop before he died. MASSIVE LEAP OF LOGIC IN CLASSIC HAVEN STYLE! Yes they visited the same shop – but it’s a small town! I imagine half the population visits the same shops over and over.

Haven and logical deduction never go together. But Nathan notices that Audrey uses “Tater” to refer to the dead cop, Tatum – how would ”Lexi” know his nickname? Secret’s out Audrey! Of course Nathan isn’t happy she didn’t tell him but she points out that not only did half the town want her to shoot him, but so did Nathan. Nathan’s also not thrilled Duke knew before she did.

They go to Krebb’s shop – but Jordan has overheard everything through her bugs and is lying in ambush for them. She pulls a gun and demands Audrey kill Nathan. Audrey says no and Duke and Nathan draw their own guns. Not really thought this through have you Jordan? (Can someone please kill her? Vince preferably with a big nasty Trouble). Jordan says Nathan only has a few minutes left so they might as well make it count (especially since she’s hidden Krebbs) and Nathan agrees – but Audrey decides they’ve spent 3 seasons doing the impossible so they can find another way to end the Troubles. She’s not killing Nathan.

And then Wade arrives screwing up Jordan’s now rapidly changing plan even more especially since he thinks he’s going to save the town and get super powers because of her very very very inadequate explanation of the Crocker family secret. Duke stops Wade but he leaves convinced now that Duke is trying to keep him from the sweet sweet power.

Krebbs wakes up and Audrey hurriedly explains his Trouble – and Jordan pipes up (will someone please shoot her) that if he leaves his clock in place Audrey can kill Nathan and cure them all. Nathan defends her but really she’s long past indefensible here.

With Krebbs they discover the thieves stole a birthday present he wanted to give to a woman he liked but hasn’t worked up the courage to tell her how he feels. Audrey tells him to call her (and if she says “eww no.” what happens then? Does she get a timer or the whole town?) He calls with less than 15 seconds to spare (seriously – this goes way over timer. The dial tone alone is about 5 seconds) he quickly blurts out a request for coffee and she ums and ahs (doesn’t sound very enthused) before agreeing. The countdown stops.

Wade, in his car drinking, gathers his courage and goes inside to stab the jubilant Krebbs so he can coat his hand with the man’s blood. He mocks Duke that he’s not the only special Crocker and he can end the Troubles now (Duke, did you not notice your brother is a sociopath?) and he leaves while Duke stops Nathan shooting him.

Jordan is shocked and astonished (REALLY?) and calls an ambulance. Duke begs Nathan to let him go after Wade because Wade doesn’t know what he’s doing (the concept of stabbing is alien to him?)

Jordan returns to Vince, all sad and tearful, and let’s Vince go. She tells Vince he was right and asks what happened to his wife – he says she found out what Vince did and left him (he had her father murdered after all).  She’s leaving Haven (yaaaa).

Back at the police station it’s confirmed that Krebbs will live and no-one seems to be hunting Wade for attempted murder. And Audrey is angry with Nathan. She’s angry because she made the decision to end the Troubles by going in the Barn and Nathan screwed that up by shooting Fake!Agent Howard. He couldn’t let her go – now she’s expected to kill him and let him go? She’s not going to do it because the of Guard it’s not their decision. Or Nathan’s – she loves him so it’s her decision

Before leaving, Jordan says goodbye to Wade. He asks how he ends all the Troubles and she claims it wouldn’t have worked, it was all a mistake. But Wade is happy now – the blood made him feel so good and has given him a purpose, a reason for being there (as Duke said, it’s addictive). He cuts her leg and smears his hand with her blood. He goes silver eyed, she refuses to tell him the plan – and he stabs her to death.

By the end of season 4, if Jordan hadn’t have died, I think Haven would have been a wasteland with just Jordan left in the middle with an empty gun, surrounded by corpses. “Killing the postman! THAT MAY END THE TROUBLES!” BANG! “oh, it didn’t. What about the fishmonger?!” BANG! She’s willing to kill people on the basis of vast leaps of logic and guesses. She did become a monster and I kind of think her ending was pretty much poetic justice or the consequences of her own actions; she created a weapon designed to murder the Troubled and it murdered her. I couldn’t really feel pity for her because anything pitiable about her faded when she decided to get what she wanted no matter how many bodies she left behind

And can we scrap all previous storylines and just have the story of Gloria? In fact we desperately need more Gloria because with the-not-very-useful Jennifer gone we’re left with Audrey the super-woman, a whole lot of men and Jordan, the source of all bad ideas ever.

Also what happened to Wade? When did Wade become someone willing to kill for shiny powers?