Fear the Walking Dead, Season 4, Episode 16.... I Lose Myself

Althea is still alive - running from zombies, alone until she runs into Martha who has a mission for her - she wants Althea to take a message to Morgan

Althea’s not having that

So, after a scuffle, Martha knocks her out - but does safely deliver Althea (she doesn’t hate Althea because Althea doesn’t help people - she trades for their stories which isn’t the same as help) to the rest of the gang with a video of Martha saying… well the same thing she’s always been saying. Let’s face it, Martha isn’t exactly a person with multiple messages and themes.

But the gangs together and Morgan tells them all about Alexandria and it’s time to head there - but on the way they’re going to Polar Bear’s truck stop so they can pick up boxes and still help people.

Except Morgan wants to help Martha, even though she’s sick, even though she’s dying, even though she continually trying to kill them over and over and over again. Morgan wants to help her and decides to go off alone to do that. John agrees to wait with the rest at the truck stop for 2 days before coming to find him. That gives them time to reflect on moving on, building a new future, making up for the bad stuff they’ve done and for June and John to have an “awww” moment.

Morgan and Martha meet up with Morgan killing zombie James and she’s clearly very very ill, unable to stand and generally sick. He insists on trying to help and offers her medicine and she continually refuses. He forces her into a police car so he can drag her back - while she struggles and fights and resists

He rightly concludes she’s lost someone and she tells him about her dead husband Hank. He tries to tell her how it’s all not her fault she doesn’t have to do this - and Martha isn’t to blame and is who he used to be etc etc etc they’ve been saying the same words over and over since she first appeared

But drama - all of the gang at the Truck Stop are suddenly horrifically ill and awful and call Morgan to say something’s wrong. It turns out that Martha has poisoned the bottled water with antifreeze as punishment for them helping people. Morgan steps on it to try and get back as soon as possible to tell them (his walkie doesn’t have the same range as the Truck Stop’s transmitter) - and Martha drives them off the road.

After the crash Morgan has something impaled in his leg and is all woozy as Martha draws on his face as she does all her prezombies with “Lose someone lose myself” just in case we missed the oh-so-subtle message here. Morgan again tries to save her and she reveals she’s been bitten

She made sure he couldn’t help her. And now he has to kill her to help his friends. He fights her but he’s utterly terrified that if he kills her he will change back to what he was. He’s also afraid that if he loses everyone, suffers another loss, he will also go back to the evil Morgan. This was why he left Alexandria in the first place - he didn’t want to lose more people he cared about and was afraid of what he would become. He refuses to kill her and instead leaves her handcuffed to the car so when she turns she can’t hurt anyone else

Really? She has been BITTEN. This is a point where putting her out of everyone’s misery would be quite reasonable here Morgan

He then staggers off on foot (did he even try to drive the car?), fighting zombies, hobbling, desperately trying to help his friends. He does get close enough to call them and tell them what they’ve been poisoned by - and June knows ethanol is the cure. They have a tanker of that but when they all fight to recover it, working together, rescuing each other, they end up losing it when Althea has to use the Big Guns on her truck to clear out the zombies.

Or apparently lose it

Fear the Walking Dead: Season 4, Episode 15: I Lose People

At the end of last episode, Morgan had one of his massive emotional yo-yos and is all depressed on the top of the hospital roof. James continues to insist on blaming Morgan for him being bitten but no-one else really buys into that - with Wendell happily volunteering to murder him and save everyone the trouble

June still has a borderline disturbing faith in Morgan still. But at least she’s not waiting around for him to lead. Oh she’d like him to lead but is willing to take charge but he can help. Because Althea is still down in the building somewhere and probably in need of a rescue.

The rest of the group have met up - Victor and John being found by Alicia and Charlie. Because everyone here is emotionally see-sawing at the moment it’s not John’s turn to be super depressed and give up hope. While Victor has come round the other way. Even though they’re at opposite ends of the lake full of monster alligators, he’s seeing Alicia working with Charlie. And if Alicia can forgive Charlie after all the devil child has done to her than anything can happen and everyone can come together and be all shiny and hippy.

Especially when Alicia hears June on their walkie-talkie. Except Morgan is a little less shiny because Martha is listening to them and he’s still full of self-blame and guilt and moping. Alicia isn’t buying it. Yes she was all fragile and close to breaking and needing a win last episode - but she has got her win. She’s on top of the world

I can’t decide if the hyper emotional see-sawing of everyone on this show is exhausting or perhaps a well written indication of how very emotionally damaged everyone is. Maybe both.

Alicia plans her next step, how to get to Victor and John across the island when Martha attacks. She’s furious that they’re trying to help and, seeing her wounds, Alicia and Charlie offer to help her. Martha gets rather agitated about that. She continues her ongoing spiel about helping making people weak. And then collapses because she is injured

This does leave them free to grab Althea’s big machine gun van which is perfect for crossing the water and rescuing Victor and John

They also take Martha captive because good guys never kill their enemies. And they really really really really need to start. She’s angry of course about all the helping stuff and also because they broke her “chain” (she kills a helper, makes them into a zombie then uses that zombie to kill the next one and takes that zombie. Yes she’s not rational).

Fear the Walking Dead, Season 4, Episode 14: MM54

It’s time for some history for Martha (i.e. muddy woman) - which is pretty necessary when you create a character that is pretty much “frothing psychopath” which is both problematic and really really really damn lazy.

So way back in presumably the early days of the apocalypse (I presume by the number of cars since you won’t see so many of them in current stage apocalypse) Martha and her partner where in a car when they had a terribad accident in which he is badly impaled. He is suffering and dying slowly and she tragically, tearfully reassures him someone will stop and help them. She tries to flag down several cars

None stop

In a truly tragic scene he dies and he turns into a zombie - and Martha has to kill him. She then buries him and has a complete breakdown lying on his grave getting steadily muddier. When she leaves she finds a woman leaving one of the boxes and Martha corrects her spelling (she was an English teacher. Also it’s clear these box deliverers are really really uber hippies because she even thanks Martha for nitpicking her spelling in the Apocalypse) and then kills her - for the crime of helping and suggest Martha helps

Martha then goes from box to box, killing helper after helper, turning them into zombies and then using said zombie to kill the next helper. She wants to find the person who started this - Polar Bear, ranting that people who are helped don’t learn to take care of themselves.

And she hears Morgan on the radio

To the present when she has used Althea’s truck to unleash a hail of bullets against our heroes. And miraculously while everyone’s a little beat up no-one is actually dead or seriously injured. She stops the truck to try and finish them off - but Wendall gets out of the truck and shoots her (laying on the floor since his wheelchair was destroyed) - bird shot - but he does shoot her. This has her hiding in her truck and driving off mid rant. Not necessarily because she’s given up - but because a horde is arriving. And the truck - with all the boxes in it - explodes. An ever increasing number of zombies has gathered and the gang has no choice but to try and run and keep ahead of it.

They stagger down the road, kind of injured conscious of the fact that the zombies are following and they’re kind of beaten up. Morgan sees a sign for a hospital and thinks it’s a good place to hide and hold up and have June check their injuries

I mean… he’s kinda not exactly wrong with this reasoning. But in the zombie apocalypse I can think of few places more likely to be full of zombies: hospitals, residential homes, prisons.

James starts having a tantrum about how Morgan has led them astray and caused all these problems and no-one else is especially thrilled with this - Sarah in particular is quick to speak up in Morgan’s defence and demand James kind of get in line.

They arrive at the hospital and find that they do have something of a sanctuary for a little time, long enough for June to confirm no-one is that badly hurt and to get Morgan a wheelchair. We also have some character exploration: Althea, the journalist of eternal questions, asks Wendell what caused him to need a wheelchair (which… look “journalist” doesn’t justify intrusive unnecessary questions). He was hurt as a 10 year old child saving another child. This actually gave him a drive to help people - enough to join the marines who laughed him out without even looking at his application. Wendell is not entirely unsympathetic to to Martha’s point - helping people gets you hurt. (Which isn’t entirely Martha’s philosophy since she thinks helping people hurts them). This is also why Sarah left the Marines - not agreeing how they treated and devalued Wendell.

Fear the Walking Dead, Season 4, Episode 13: BlackJack

Morgan and the truckers are all still looking for the mysterious man who had the Truck before them, all of Morgan’s friends, Quinn world peace and some really good drugs

June not just wants to find John but she has definitely had a full blown conversion to the Morgan Cult.

James is not a fan, referring to the truck as an “airport shuttle” because of all the extras they’re grabbing. Althea is somewhat neutral but wants to find Quinn because he has her truck and she’s obsessive about it. Sarah and Wendell are kind of mellow because they’re kind of mellow about everything. They’re also great fun with their points for killing zombies, casual rogueish approach to the apocalypse, low key competence and general fun

It’s nice to have characters approaching the apocalypse with a casual amusement. I also like that Wendell proves he is quite capable of defending himself while James clearly isn’t (and learns strongly that Wendel is not incapable because he uses a wheelchair).

And they find one of the Dirty Woman’s written on zombie which leads to a walky talky conversation with her. It’s what we expect from her filthy weirdness. People are strong when they’re alone and stabbing people in the face for the last cookie in the world but helping people or needing help or accepting help just makes you super super super weak and shameful. I mean is she actually against all co-operation? Because any kind of co-operation requires a level of help. Does she think everyone should be a wandering loner?

She also reveals she knows Morgan was big bad and scary in the past so he needs to be so again.

Morgan’s not doing that. And to double down on that by burying the graffiti zombie because… well he’s almost a parody now. Ok Morgan, I get that you’re all good and fluffy now but, what, 90% of the entire world’s population is actually dead (though we are kind of assuming that. For all we know isolated islands are fine. Hey, maybe it’s confined entirely to the Americas) he’s going to be digging a whole long time. In fact you may cause more environmental damage with the holes than just leaving the bodies to rot. Morgan has a big speech about how they will continue to meet and help everyone

They spend a little while reflecting on how nice the guy - known as Polar Bear - who set up this trucking network was. Wendal and Sarah are sure he’s alive - they have standards. They wouldn’t steal from someone who couldn’t manage alone. Awww aren’t they nice.

Sarah and Wendell still aren’t entirely on side with riding to the rescue and Sarah even begins to draw a blade on Morgan … which he deals with in 2 seconds with his stick. Sarah and Wendell quickly realise Morgan has 10,000 levels of badass more than them and decide they have absolutely no objection with going where he wants to go - especially since Althea can drive the truck

Fear the Walking Dead, Season 4, Episode 12: Weak

After the hurricane, June and Althea survived. And June is super sad she didn’t go with John. Despite the fact she was definitely in two minds about going home with him and making a happy life together. She throws in a bit of beating herself up - how she always runs when something terrible happens.

She keeps trying to call John on the walky talky. They’re both stranded near Althea’s big, scary SWAT van - they’ve ran out of diesel, but Althea is obsessed with this van. She can’t bring herself to leave it - even as they begin stripping all the resources from the area.

When they get some static on the Walky, June insists they go to high ground to find out - despite Althea being super reluctant to leave the van. And beginning to feel ill which is always worrisome in an apocalypse. You need radical healing methods

As they travel Althea is very evasive whenever June tries to ask her about her story. As they drive they see her SWAT van drive past - someone has stolen it. Althea is NOT HAVING THAT and charges after them at such a terrible unsafe scene they end up crashing off the road… and when trying to fix the car it’s clear Althea isn’t just a little ill - she’s can’t-stand-sweating-messily sick. She needs medicine - medicine she claims she has on the van

So when June hears the van’s guns she goes to investigate. She’s held at gunpoint by a man and desperately tries to reason with him by not-subtly throwing around this season’s theme. Yes we all used to be evil, stealing, taking, desperately getting by, screw everyone else but we don’t have to be that way. We can make better choices and be good people. Kumbaya et al. He’s not convinced and even makes a good point - if he does join them he will be “guy in group who once didn’t shoot June” which makes him pretty disposable

He’s kinda not wrong. I mean even aside from a “who do we save” perspective, from a narrative point the writers would so make him disposable. I mean not THE most disposable but still.

June does get the upper chance in the fight and suddenly he’s all willing to talk - and he tells him it’s time to leave. She doesn’t shoot him - just drives him off. She then calls Althea to ask her where the medicine is - which takes a while because the very sick Althea is having zombie issues. But that dealt with she manages to tell June there isn’t any - she just wanted the van back

She wanted June to risk her life to get the van back for a lie.

And Althea doesn’t even seem sorry. Even when June explains why she’s really furious - not because she nearly died. But she nearly killed - she nearly became the person she used to be again!

Ooooh that may be that subtle redemption theme sledgehammering its way into the episode again.

Also, Althea… I think we have some flowers for you to look at. You need to drop these habits before you get to Alexandria.

Thankfully they find some magical healing meds and Althea is all healed. But this is when they get a message from Morgan - he’s leading his little mystery tour of Texas broadcasting out to everyone that hey he has loads of supplies, please come murder him. (I mean, really, I get that he’s taken 8 levels of crunchy hippy here, but this is suicidal. “I am Here! I have supplies!”)

June wants to drive to them as soon as possible, naturally. But Althea wants to stay. Because the truck. And at this point we have to concede that Althea’s attachment to the truck is perhaps a bit unhealthy. June asks about this - and Althea says it’s her tapes. She needs her tapes - they not only have the stories of people she’s met but also the stories of several people she loves. Stories of people she cared about, her story. She can’t face abandonning them

Um… they’re in a car. It has carrying capacity. This isn’t The Walking Dead Survival Instinct.

Why go for this? I mean maybe she just really really likes driving around in a giant fecking tank with big big guns? In fact Althea reminds me a little bit like the people of Alexandria before Rick arrived - she’s sheltered. Not because she’s been in a safe settlement - but because she’s been driving around in something equivalent - allowing her to face off against zombies and violent people alike. I think it’s understandable that she’d view this as something of a safety blanket.

Fear the Walking Dead: Season 4, Episode 11: the Code

So we have the super duper storm last episode and Morgan desperately seeks shelter in a convenient truck full of emergency supplies and chocolate

Really? Because I’ve played computer games with fully stocked medikits in every ancient ruin and rubbish bin and they were less convoluted and convenient

He decides to hunker down for the night there and rest. When he wakes up he’s in Mississippi.

Whut… really? I mean really really? Did the writers completely run out of ideas of how to actually get Morgan away from the rest of the cast?

He looks around the truck stop full of amazing supplies, electricity and water and someone calls on the radio - looking for a “Polar Bear” he speaks to her and she says he can take what he needs so long as he leaves what he doesn’t

He stocks up on some supplies, examines some maps, uses the toilets and is interrupted by Wendall, a Black man in a wheelchair with a shotgun who wishes to discuss him using the disabled stall.

He is joined by Sarah, a white woman, and they introduce each other as twins with a “yeah we know it’s not true but you don’t need to know” look. They seem a little surprised that he spoke to someone on the radio but lay out their spiel - they’re truckers. And when the zombie apocalypse hit they were perfectly placed to know where all the warehouses where, to know their way around the roads, where to find petrol and generally able to move supplies around to where they’re needed easily.

Which sounds pretty awesome. But we’re not running with that, yet anyway.

Morgan tells them about Alexandria and where he’s heading and how it’s a super shiny place of people doing good just like the truckers. But when he hears that the storm was a hurricane (which the truck drove through… apparently) Morgan decides he simply must go back to help his friends back in Texas. They give him supplies for the journey

But with some sad music and zombie montages Morgan reaches a perfectly intact bridge and then calls Sarah and Wendall to say that the bridge is out, he’s coming back. Yes he’s lying, no he’s not going back to help. Morgan’s new found saintliness is chipping

He decides to return to the truck stop to meet up with Wendall and Sarah again so they can go to Alexandria together when he finds a man running - tied up, with a bag on his head, being chased by Walkers. Naturally Morgan runs to the rescue despite the fact that the man, Jim, isn’t exactly grateful. Jim clearly isn’t an extra because he’s played by that guy from 12 Monkeys so he’s going to be around for a while

So Jim is a brewer. He makes beer. And he was kidnapped by people who wished to punish him for the heinous crime of inflicting American beer on the world steal his recipe. Jim’s really big about making beer bragging about his awards and his plans for the future - basically make lots of beer and hope the world sorts itself out so he can sell beer. Which… I mean his point that humans will infest the planet in time has merit because humans are worse than cockroaches for that… but I think it’s going to be a while before we get a market economy up and running.

They reunite with Wendell and Sarah - and Wendall points his shotgun again. Seems they were the ones who kidnapped Jim. Because Sarah likes beer

That’s pretty much the whole of their motives

Oh and they stole the truck off a guy in Texas who was using it to charitably leave boxes of emergency supplies at road markers

Fear the Walking Dead: Season 4, Episode 10: Close Your Eyes

Well this was an episode that was all about the emotional journey - and it was excellent for that

It was excellent in part because it’s clear, after last episode, that we need some emotional journeys because everyone is currently wallowing in an emotional wreck and unless we start stirring from that it’s only going to circle down

But also because this was always something of a core theme of The Walking Dead as a franchise: how do people react to the apocalypse, how do ordinary people change, grow and adapt in this world where all the rules have changed so completely.

Alicia works her way through the terrible storm to an abandoned home. Well a home with zombies anyway - which she promptly kills and then dumps outside. And then dumps out all their happy family photos

Alicia, in her deep depression, cannot even stand to see pictures of a happy family.

She barricades the house, explores and then finds someone else hiding in the house - Charlie.

This does… not make Alicia happy. She screams that she can’t be in the house with Charlie and runs out into the storm, desperately trying to get into a car. Which fails, she falls and ends up knocking herself out. Only to wake up and find Charlie has dragged her back into the house.

This also doesn’t make Alicia happy.

Charlie is barricaded in a bedroom and Alicia has a whole recapping yet deeply emotional rant of all the things Charlie has done to her and how utterly furious Alicia is at her. She’s responsible for the death of her mother, her brother and her community. Oh and her speech about Nick - Charlie killed Nick when he tried to save her, and he died slowly and painfully feeling like a complete failure and that his life was worthless

When it comes to laying on guilt trips Alicia is a master

But she has her own conflict: she’s torn. She can’t be here with Charlie. She can’t send her out in the storm. But if they’re both stuck in the house she’s sure she’ll kill Charlie - she doesn’t even know if she wants to, but she knows she will.

This is Alicia’s conflict. She knows Charlie is a kid. But she also loathes her for what she’s done and being a kid isn’t a pass for that. But she also wants to live up to her mother’s legacy of forgiveness and hope which definitely doesn’t include child murder. Even this isn’t necessary a matter of hope or positivity but about clinging desperately to her mother’s legacy and keeping her alive. This definitely follows on from the last episode when Alicia is struggling so much with her redemption but it’s one of the most toxic redemptions ever - it’s about clinging unhealthily to her mother’s memory, denying the present and self-flagellation. It’s toxic, it’s powerful and it’s painful

Fear the Walking Dead, Season 4, Episode 9: People Like Us

We have a big storm coming with flying zombies. I’m pretty sure that Z Nation did the whole Zomnado thing first.

But the main point of this episode was to recap where everyone is currently mentally and emotionally by having Morgan visit them all

So basically I can recap the whole episode with “everyone is super super sad”. Except John because I don’t think he even understands the concept of sad.

Luciana has fallen into a deep depression. She doesn’t think anything matters any more and she spends all day listening to terrible music she’s found in a mansion Victor’s set up in. This is pretty dangerous since she listens to the music and even ignores when zombies are sneaking up on her. This is not a good survival tactic.

Victor is equally broken only he’s working through this by emptying the very very very extensive wine cellar. Again, not a great survival method.

John is still recovering from his wound and June is nursing him. He has a hope - he wants to go back to his cabin with Charlotte and June and they can live happily ever after

Until a herd arrives or some guys with guns. It’s not exactly the best thought out tactic for long term survival. June also has her own doubts. Sure she and John spent some happy times together - but that was when June wasn’t June, she’d ignored her past and was living a kind of persona. She doesn’t know if John will like her now she’s being her. Althea has some great advice for letting the past go and moving on.

And Alicia? Well she’s not doing so well. Morgan finds her out on her own collecting notes from zombies - someone is putting notes asking for help on the zombies and sending them out like very morbid carrier pigeons.

Personally I rather think the whole effort involved in pinning messages to zombies, not being eaten by said zombies then hiding from said zombies long enough for them to forget you and go wandering off means you probably have the skills and resources to help yourself…

Morgan goes with Alicia and they find they’re too late - and all of Alicia’s grief spills out

Obviously she’s doing this to distract herself. But it’s also a kind of redemption - just as Madison become the ruthless do-what-you-need-to-survive then changed and embrace hope and created the stadium, Alicia sees herself as going the other way. Since Madison’s death, hunting the vultures, she became the ruthless one. What I think is interesting is how Fear the Walking Dead recognises or presents it as an UNHEALTHY redemption attempt. This isn’t an attempt to be better or find hope, it’s self flagellation and really broken and well presented.

Morgan makes relatively brief attempts to get everyone to come with him to Alexandria but everyone says no - he plans to leave with Althea driving but is derailed by the storm when helping Alicia find her note maker

Everyone else is looking for Charlie. She managed to escape a close encounter with a zombie and then ran off - John went looking for her and recruited Victor because John is still injured (and Victor too drunk). Luciana got pulled in as she drove Charlie out of the mansion into the storm when she saw her - since Charlie shot Nick, Luciana is not a fan of the murder child - but then she saw the kid left behind the book Nick gave her… and the guilts hit

Althea and June were busy checking out weird stuff happening upriver - evidenced by the large number of zombies floating down the river.

So the whole team is now split up - during the zombnado.

Fear the Walking Dead, Season 4, Episode 8: No One's Gone

Did I ever mention how much I’m not a fan of shows playing with their timelines? Because I’m not a fan. I’d really really really like stories to be told in order; alas it never is

So in one timeline we have Madison trying to steal an awesome truck by holding Althea at gun point

That’s not a typo - Madison and Althea met. It wasn’t exactly all that friendly. Madison wants the SWAT mobile and is willing to threaten murder to get it. Althea is unwilling to give up the SWATmobile and there’s lots of threats and stubbornness. Althea tries to jump Madison which doesn’t go well, because, well, Madison.

Madison does learn about Althea’s little interview tapes and while she can’t steal the SWATmobile, she can steal them in the hope Althea has run across Nick or Alicia. Althea manages to catch up with her when she’s all despairing to get her tapes back and hold Madison at gunpoint

But, in her own way, Althea is as impossibly good as John is. She has an excellent story of why she cares so very much about the truth and how as a reporter she once did an improbable amount of good by simply revealing the truth. She is convinced that everyone’s story will matter one day and I really like her. Honestly it’s wonderful to see a character that is this passionate about something other than survival in a zombie apocalypse, someone who is inherently hopeful

 She just wants Madison’s story - which Madison tells with a fake name. She speaks about wanting to create a place for her children, somewhere safe: the Stadium. Not just because it has walls but so they can all live without having to make these brutal choices. She even has a beautiful story of how kind and caring her kids where when they were children - and how much she wants them to stay that way.

Althea sends her on her way - with supplies.

Which convinces Madison that, yes, people can be good and she wanted to help people. So when she reunites with Nick et al she creates the Stadium

Yes, she met Althea after the last season but before creating the Stadium - and it was Althea who inspired her to become all kinds of good and kind which is the Madison we’ve come to identify