Showing posts with label the vampires diaries. Show all posts
Showing posts with label the vampires diaries. Show all posts

Sunday, April 10, 2016

Vampire Diaries, Season 7, Episode 17: I went Into the Woods



So, the phoenix stone was broken thanks to the Dead Lesbian Trope which means, as Rayna helpfully explains to Valerie (Rayna is now capturable by Valerie because everyone’s power level on this show changes based on what’s currently convenient), all the souls trapped inside it have now escaped and are winging their way into any convenient dead person: human or vampire.

This is a bad thing because Rayna targets the worst of the worst

Apparently. I mean, she hasn’t targeted anyone specifically in the last season and has pretty much killed any vampire she comes across. But her motivation changes every other week anyway – I think the writers are now using a roulette wheel to characterise her.

This does mean Stefan has escaped and is now occupying the body of a recently deceased alcoholic drunk driver who is subject to a manhunt in the middle of a snow storm. Also, because he’s in a human body that means he has three days before he implodes anyway (as Alec learned when he tried to bring Jo back from the dead). He’s in the body of an alcoholic so they can maturely examine the complexities of addiction. Ha! No, this is The Vampire Diaries, he’s in this body so everyone can say what a terrible, useless person the dead man is and what a burden it is on poor Stefan to be in his body because this show has all the nuance of a sledgehammer wielded by a Donald Trump supporter.

One good thing that does come from this is Stefan admitting, after so many seasons of this show trying to present vampirisim as a curse, that being human sucks and is full of pain and suffering and awful and he wants his super powers back again.

By the way Alec is also involved because… actually I have no real idea why. Mainly so he and Valerie can moodily compare notes about how Caroline and Stefan would much rather be together than be with them. Angst angst woe woe I don’t care.

Also, Matt is not dead. Still.

Damon is still trying to hold onto the crown of self-loathing telling everyone what a terrible person he is and kind of missing the fact that pretty much everyone on this show is terrible and none of them have the standing to throw rocks from their shiny shiny glass houses. He’s found Stefan’s body, now occupied by a not very friendly but definitely more fun (not hard to do), serial killer who heads off to Tennessee for some slaughtering. Damon leaves that little issue to Valerie and Alec to clear up (along with Rayna who escapes and now wants to go around and stake all the vampires who escaped. This would have been much easier if she’d done this in the first place rather than relied on the damn Phoenix Stone torment thing). So I think we can expect a race to find the serial killer while he merrily kills people

Saturday, October 10, 2015

The Vampire Diaries, Season 7, Episode 1: Day One of Twenty-two Thousand, Give or Take



We’re going to start this new, Elena-less Vampire Diaries, 3 years from now with Stefan reviving a desiccated Damon.

Now back to the present with Caroline writing a diary about Damon taking Alaric to “Europe” on a boozy party to help him grieve (Caroline thinks this is a bad idea… I actually don’t). Bonnie has been sent to chaperone because without Elena around she has to find some white people to play nursemaid to. Of course no-one is looking after Bonnie

Bonnie is keeping diary of their alcoholic adventures, judging them and getting friendly suggestions of dying form Stefan (this actually works as cute banter because Damon and Bonnie are actually pretty good at the frenemies thing. Oh dear good spellcheck does not object to “frenemies” the world is officially past saving, though it’s also uncomfortably true that if Bonnie dies, Elena is back).

Matt’s becoming a Deputy which no-one cares about

Caroline and Stefan are doing the awkward not!romance weird things since Stefan is totally waiting for her to decide she wants him while she’s still in mourning limbo.

To one of the witchpires, Valarie Stefan’s evil mother Lily realeased who pretty much hates everything (including being hit by cars). Even her family of witchpires: Lily, “stoic” Bo, “brat” Nora, “devious-mentor” Mary-Louise and Malcolm “Lily’s pet – the brown noser” don’t seem to be on her “like” list. They are all being bitter and nasty to each other over the short rations of blood they have. We do see Nora and Mary-Louise are a couple. Lily lectures them on how slaughter is a bad thing and got the imprisoned and they need to play nice. Lorenzo is, apparently, still in the picture as is some guy called Oscar. Lily is also de-factor leader despite not being a witchpire

And lo, already the cast is too damn big

Valarie is also not a fan of the whole not slaughtering people thing and while they all may hate each other they at least put on a face of caring for Valarie when she’s super upset. Valarie, Nora and Mary-Louise go out to unleash some slaughter vengeance, using blood and magic. Nora even takes a selfie with her victim and they don’t even try to cover up the deaths.

So Stefan and Matt are on the case. Yes, Matt is on the case. Is that not a message for despair? They pass the info on to Rick and Damon in the hope that drunken Rick can tell them how to make a bomb. This also means telling Damon and Bonnie that, yes, Lily has her evil family back. Damon is also still all sad about Elena and Bonnie has to comfort him before they find out that Rick isn’t actually drunk – he’s drinking tea not bourbon – he’s going to see alleged psychics to speak to his wife and beating up charlatans along the way

Saturday, November 15, 2014

The Vampire Diaries, Season 6, Episode 7: Do You Remember the First Time




Damon and Elena have come face to face. Instantly the compulsion crumbles as the writers realise what an annoying plot line this will be. They declare their eternal love (briefly) before bravely stepping forward to do whatever they can to rescue Bonnie because she’s an amazing friend who has done so much for them

Hah! No. Elena can only remember bad things about Damon so no love. Lots of angst. Yay.

Damon goes to see Alaric in hospital to whine about all the evil things he’s done. I actually wonder if the writers sit back and read what they’ve written – because here is Damon reciting just a fraction of the evil things he’s done (and I’m annoyed at how much is omitted) and this isn’t a scene about what a terrible person Damon is – but about Damon complaining to Alaric about the memory issue. Though their friendship is still intact and Damon is glad Alaric is alive (though still kind of pissed at him so he torments Alaric a little bit). The patient tormenting has Jo show up to make it clear that she can’t repeat the whole vampire cure and that Damon must not tell anyone. She also orders Alaric on a date

Elena shares the whole Damon thing with Caroline who decides this is all good because Damon is evil and now Elena has Liam (character consistency is an alien concept to Caroline) because we really need a love triangle. For added funsies, Liam is still super super confused about Elena saving someone’s life and is going to completely violate this patients privacy to satisfy his curiosity. Elena decides to look troubled and angsty about this rather than compelling him into forgetting/letting it go/not being an arsehole because REASONS.

Over to Tripp the hunter who is now the captive of Enzo’s, apparently. Oh can people stop taking their enemies captive and just kill them? Matt wants him to live and Enzo wants him interrogated and Stefan wants him dead (meaning I am actually agreeing with Stefan. I feel so very wrong). Tripp protests to Matt that his friends are murderers because he has a laughing belief that anyone in Mystic Falls actually cares. So it’s torture time so Tripp can reveal the identity of all his vampire hunting friends.

Unfortunately, Tripp’s minions have kidnapped Sheriff Liz and are holding her hostage, so Caroline and Stefan (who she is still mad with) have to get her back (and tell Enzo not to kill Tripp. Also touch-screens and blood are annoying according to Enzo). Of course, kidnapping the Sheriff means Tripp’s attempts to convince Matt he’s on Team Evil (which he certainly is) and should come to the light kind of go awry.

Stefan and Caroline show up to collect Tripp and Enzo talks about Caroline clearly having a crush on Stefan because this is really what matters in this situation. (Why does every character have to comment on this? Seriously if they went over to New Orleans, Esther would pause mid kid-torturing to ask whether Stefan and Caroline are going to get it on)

Anyway, they agree the prisoner exchange and do it at the border of Mystic Falls – the anti-magic zone which is a great idea to stop the vampires just killing the kidnappers. But when Tripp crosses the barrier, his throat is suddenly slit. Looks like Enzo turned him into a vampire before sending him over – that’s an excellent idea. Matt is angry and sad about this because… I have no idea, he has Caroline’s consistency issues. Tripp dies

Caroline and Stefan then have relationship talk.

Saturday, March 22, 2014

The Vampire Diaries, Season 5, Episode 16: While You Were Sleeping



Party time – booze and Elena dancing on the table and taking off her top (revealing a second top underneath) – which apparently isn’t her and she’s outraged that they don’t realise it isn’t her – I mean, dancing on the table and giving her little brother hard booze! The very idea.

Do I point out now that EVERYONE on this show has been drinking hard liquor since they were like 12? It’s not like they even drink beer – it’s whiskey or nothing. Jeremy has been drinking hard booze in bars since season 1.

Anyway it’ a dream and Elena wakes up (I had the strangest dream – I dreamt that I actually objected to tequila shots… what a nightmare). The whole place is empty except for Stefan and she has been magically trapped in the building. Stefan gives her a recap about being possessed and now being a Ripper vampire that eats vampires. They’re working on a ration system to supply blood.

Damon is still chained in the dungeon (or rechained) with Jeremy and Matt there to remind him that they don’t like him very much because of the whole killing people thing (Jeremy is actually holding more of a grudge over the death of Aaron than he is over Damon trying to kill him. Or Vicky.) When his phone rings and Jeremy answers it he even reminds Jeremy that he’s murdered him before – oh such hijinks! Anyway, Damon and Elena talk full of goopiness and her apologising to him for Katherine breaking her heart (I think it’s more “I am sorry that happened to you” sorry than “it’s all my fault” sorry). Then she brings up Aaron, which Damon quickly avoids.

Caroline is in Dr. Wes’s lab looking for a cure and gets his notes on the werewolf venom being added to Elena’s dose – and she meets Enzo who is very flirty, very very very sexy and claims to have the antidote.

Stefan arrives with Elena’s ration – and she’s a starving killing machine in the presence of vampire blood. She starts angsting and Caroline rings to drop the news about the werewolf venom as well – and if they want the cure, Enzo insists they meet. Apparently the cure is Traveller related and they want to keep themselves secret from Liv. Just in case there aren’t enough emotional issues floating around, Elena always wants to know if she and Stefan did anything while Katherine was possessing her and trying to get Stefan back

Because this information is a priority right now.

When Stefan leaves she tries to call Aaron (since she doesn’t use a spirit board she gets now answer) and she opens her diary and comically over-acts at the fact KATHERINE HAS WRITTEN IN IT! This leads to a really freaky dream sequence about making out with Stefan and Stefan and Damon fighting – have we just stopped trying to make sense now, Vampire Diaries? She wakes up with a nose bleed.

She calls Damon with her theory that the werewolf venom virus is actually hurting her and causing her to hallucinate her worst fears. Or it could be a side-effect of long term Traveller possession but being Vampire Diaries I’m going to guess that her first guess will magically prove to be right. Anyway more angst, some coughing up blood, some recaps, more avoiding talking about Aaron.

Saturday, April 27, 2013

The Vampire Diaries, Season Four, Episode 20: The Originals

Elena is downstairs in the basement  and Stefan and Damon are upset because she is calm, despite not eating for three days.  Stefan points out that Elena is not going to beg for blood because desperation means emotion and Elena still has hers turned off. Damon asks how hungry Elena has to be until they can torture some feelings into her and Stefan replies, "a lot hungrier than she is now apparently." That's right, starve her and torture her for her own good; that's real love. Katherine makes her grand appearance and Damon comments that she has gotten bold because Klaus is plotting her eternal demise.  Katherine then informs them that Klaus is gone.

In New Orleans, four men pick up a coffin left in the middle of the street.  Hayley is sitting in a bar and Jane-Anne comments that this is third time this week she is there.  Hayley replies that she is simply in love with gumbo. Jane-Anne says that people in the 9th ward believe her sister Sophie bleeds a little bit of her soul into every dish. Changing topics, Hayley says that she asked around the quarter about her family and still has not found them or a single person who remembers them. Jane-Anne tells Hayley that people like her were run out of there years ago. When Hayley asks her what she means people like her, Jane-Anne circles the bayou on the map and says that she will find the werewolves there. Jane-Anne adds that Hayley should be careful because this is the last place she would ever want to go. As soon as Hayley leaves, Jane-Anne makes eye contact with her sister and shows her the hair she stole from Hayley.

Hayley hops in her car and follows the map. Jane-Anne and Sophie head to a cemetery and Sophie tells her not to do it but Jane-Anne is adamant that they have to do this spell because this is the only way to get to Klaus. Sophie asks about getting someone else to do the spell and Jane-Anne asks who, because half the witches don't believe her and the other half are too scared.  Sophie suggests that they are going to get caught but Jane-Anne says that they don't have any other options. They join hands and Jane-Anne tells Sophie to go and that she knows what she needs to do.

Later that night, Jane-Anne is starting the spell with salt,, just as Hayley has arrived at the place on the map Jane-Anne circled for her earlier in the day.  Hayley pulls out the map to consult one more time, and it bursts into flame, causing Hayley to drop it out the window. Jane-Anne continues on with her spell and when Hayley tries to back up, her car over heats and she is forced to get out and call for a tow.  In the graveyard, Jane-Anne hums and Hayley drops her phone as she hears a high pitched sound.  When Hayley looks up, she is being surrounded by people.  In the graveyard, Jane-Anne blows out the candles, which cause Hayley to pass out and collapse into Sophie's arms.

Klaus is now in New Orleans, while back in Mystic Falls, Rebekah asks Elijah what he is dong there.  Elijah tells her that apparently there are witches conspiring against Klaus there. He adds that knowing their brother, this is a mission to silence and slaughter. Rebekah says that French Quarter witches are not a lot to be trifled with, as a witch spots Klaus in the crowd and starts putting her things away. Rebekah asks if the witches have found a way to kill Klaus once and for all and Elijah replies that in the name of their family that she might try to dial down her glee. Rebekah asks, "what family? We're three distrustful acquaintances who happen to share a bloodline.  I for one hope they find a way to make that traitorous bastard rot."  Klaus sits down with the witch and she tells him that she has nothing to say to him.  When Klaus points out that she doesn't even know him, she replies that she knows what he is, "half vampire, half beast." The fortune teller says, "you're the hybrid" and Klaus adds "that he's the original hybrid actually but that's a long story for another time."  Back in Mystic Falls, Elijah moves to leave the room and Rebekah asks where he is going.  Elijah replies, "to find out who is making the moves on our brother and then I'll either stop them, or help them, depending on my mood." Klaus tells the fortune teller that he is looking for a witch named Jane-Anne Devereaux and the fortune teller tells him that she doesn't know.  Klaus accuses her of lying and says that he knows that she is a true witch amongst the sea of posers in front of him.  The fortune teller says that witches don't talk out of school in the quarter and that the vampire won't allow it. She is adamant that she does not break Marcel's rules. Klaus then asks where he might find Marcel.

Klaus heads to a bar and Marcel is on a stage singing How You Like Me Now, by The Heavy.  Let's just say I like Marcel just fiiiine Mmmm. I don't know about you, but I actually had to pause because Marcel is the first Black vampire on the show in four seasons.  Black people have always been servant witches or snack food for Caroline. Marcel turns and looks at Klaus and says that it's been about 100 years since the nasty business with Michael.  When Klaus asks if it has been that long, Marcel says, "the way I remember it, he ran you out of town and left a trail of dead vampires in his wake." Klaus tells him that Michael is dead and Marcel says that if he had known Klaus was coming back into town, he'd have thrown him a damn parade.  It turns out that Klaus is Marcel's mentor and sire. Klaus asks if the current state of Bourbon Street is his doing and Marcel laughs and says that something has to draw in the tourists, otherwise they'd all go hungry. Klaus looks and realises that a few of the vampires have daylight rings and Marcel replies just his inner circle and that he has the witches wrapped around his finger. Klaus laughs and says that he is looking for Jane-Anne, who has some business with him.  Marcel stands and tells Klaus to come with him.  

They hit the street surrounded by vampires and Marcel asks how Klaus' family is.  Klaus says that those who are alive hate him more than ever, so Marcel tells him to forget them because if your blood relations let you down, you can always make more. Marcel says that what's his, is Klaus' as always. As they make their way along, vampires are jumping from roof to roof and on top of cars. When Klaus points out that they're not subtle, Marcel assures him that nothing is subtle in the quarter. A group of vampires bring Jane-Anne before Klaus and Marcel and tell her that she has been accused of the practice of witchcraft beyond the rules and bounds set forth by Marcel.  Jane-Anne says that she didn't do anything and Marcel tells her that it's a lie and that it drives the witches crazy that he is aware of their every move and they cannot do magic in this town without getting caught. Marcel tells Jane-Anne to tell him what kind of magic she is using and that he will grant her leniency.  Jane-Anne tells him to rot in hell.  Marcel turns and says that he will give her one more chance and then turns and quickly and slices her throat.  

Marcel walks into his acolytes and celebrates.   Klaus pulls Marcel out of the crowd and demands to know what happened because he wanted to talk to Jane-Anne.  Marcel apologises and says that he got caught up in the show. Marcel says that the witches in this town still think that they have power and that he has to show them that they don't.  He adds that he never wastes an opportunity for a show of force, which is a lesson that he learned from Klaus. Marcel promises that anything that Klaus could have gotten out of her that Marcel will find out for him.  Klaus says that whatever it was that it doesn't matter anymore.  Marcel suggests that they eat and when he leaves, Klaus stops a vampire named Jerry and asks if there are any more Devereaux witches.

Sophie is in the bar when Klaus appears.  Klaus points out that she is upset and asks if it's about the little show he just witnessed with her sister.  Sophie asks in return if he enjoyed the show and Klaus responds that it was a little melodramatic for his tastes.  Klaus asks what Jane-Anne wanted with him and why Marcel killed her. Sophie says I see you brought friends, when she looks over his shoulder. Klaus assures her that they are not with him but Sophie tells him that though he built this town, it belongs to Marcel now and if she talks to him and breaks the rules that she will be next.  Sophie walks away and Klaus approaches the two vampires and asks if they are following him.  One answers that Marcel told them to be his Klaus' guides. Klaus tells them that if either of them follow him again that they will do so without the benefit of a spine. Camille approaches them and says that if they are there for the gumbo, she's about to close.  Klaus slaps a hundred dollar bill on the table and orders the oldest scotch for his "two friends."  Klaus tells them that if Marcel wants to know what he's up to that Marcel can ask them himself. 

Sophie is down in a cellar and is approached by two vampires and one of them accuses her of doing magic. Sophie says that she is praying to her dead sister and turns to leave but one of the vampires blocks her way and says that the hybrid was looking for Jane-Anne and Marcel wants to know why. Sophie replies that this sounds like witch business and that she would say to ask Jane-Anne herself, but Marcel killed her.  Sophie tries to leave again and is grabbed from behind but the vampire who grabbed her is quickly killed.  Elijah then makes quick work of the second vampire.  Elijah introduces himself and asks what business Sophie's family has with his brother.

Klaus has made his way back to the bar and he heads towards one of Marcel's inner circle, when he notices a daylight ring.  He is quickly stopped by Diego, so Klaus asks where Marcel is. Diego asks who wants to know and adds that he only answers to Marcel.  Klaus then grabs Diego by throat and begins to shift into his hybrid form and points out that he is half werewolf and that the bite of a werewolf can kill a vampire.  Klaus tells Diego that he is going to ask one more time where is Marcel and Marcel makes a sudden appearance and tells him that Diego is just looking out for him and that no one hurts one of his guys and that this is his rule. Klaus tells Marcel that he doesn't care about the rules and that he doesn't need chaperones. Klaus asks why Marcel is having him followed and Marcel draws him away from the other vampires and says, "I get it show of force, you made your point. Let it go old friend, for me." Klaus asks Marcel to show him what he's done with place, while he explains what he has been up to in his town.  They go up to the roof and Marcel points out the skyline and says that it's progress because it represents more hotels, more humans and more fresh blood.  Marcel adds that he taught the humans to look the other way. Klaus asks about the witches and points out that in his town they're a force to be reckoned with and now they live in fear. Klaus asks how Marcel knows when they are using magic.  Marcel hints that he has a secret weapon and ace up his sleeve - something that gives him complete control over all of the magic in this town. When Klaus asks if that's a fact, Marcel replies, "it might be but maybe I'm just bluffing."  Marcel inhales on a cigarette and Klaus says you take vervain.  Marcel admits that it hurts but he wants to limit the things he's vulnerable to.  Marcel asks Klaus not to be mad about the chaperone thing and says that he asked his guys to look out for him -- that's all-- because that's what they do there, look out for each other. Marcel looks down and notices  Camille walking from the bar.  Klaus says she's either brave or dumb.  Marcel replies, "brave I let her live, dumb, she's desert."

Marcel jumps from the roof and lands behind the Camille. He tells her that it's not safe here alone but she tells him that she has a black belt in karate.  Elijah joins Klaus on the roof and he tells him to follow.  Klaus says that he's not going anywhere until he finds out who is conspiring against him and Elijah responds that he just found that out for him. 

Saturday, April 20, 2013

The Vampire Diaries Season Four, Episode Nineteen: Pictures of You

Bonnie is in the cemetery with flowers and she goes to visit Jeremy's grave. At the grave site, Bonnie says that Jeremy was supposed to come back with them.  Suddenly, Jeremy appears and tells Bonnie that she has to wake up.  In actuality, Bonnie is at home sleeping on the couch, which is on fire. 

Damon and Stefan are tossing the football around saying that they have lost count of how many days its been since Elena has killed someone.  Who tosses a football around inside their house? Could they have come up with something less ridiculous for Damon and Stefan to do to set up a bonding moment? Damon reminds Stefan that Elena does not want the cure and adds that if she thinks that they are looking for it that she will kill someone.  Stefan suggests pulling a Lexy and bombarding Elena with emotions until one of them sticks.  Stefan adds that if this doesn't work they should keep Elena locked up until they come up with a plan C.  Can we please, please stop the trend of imprisoning YA protagonists for their own damn good? Would it really be so damn hard? It's particularly horrific given the fact that both Damon and Stefan are mass murderers themselves. Damon asks what happens to Elena when she gets slammed with every emotion since Jeremy died and Stefan replies that Damon will be there to help Elena get through it. Damon says that when this is all over Stefan is going to get out of Elena's life because Stefan doesn't want to keep reliving history.

Cheerleader vampire (read: Rebekah) is talking to Elijah about how being human means a fresh start and that she can grow old, and have children. Klaus says that Silas can appear as anyone and convinced him that he was dying. Klaus believes that Klaus will torment until he hands over the cure. Rebekah reminds Klaus that if this happens, Silas will breakdown the wall to the other side. Klaus counters that this will mean the return of Kol and Flynn, thus giving them their family back. Rebekah is not pleased and reminds Klaus that he hated Kol and kept him in a box for most of his life. Elijah interjects and says that Klaus's personal discomfort might not be a sufficient reason to put the entire world in jeopardy and that Rebekah deserves a shot at happiness. Klaus asks if Elijah is joking and Elijah says that he has made his decision. Klaus leans in and tells Rebekah that when she is sick and dieing and begs for his blood that he will laugh in her face and compel her to forget him before walking away. Rebekah asks Elijah where the cure is and he tells her that she is impulsive and emotional and that she has prove it's not another one of her whims. Elijah says that he wants Rebekah to live a day as a human with no vampire privileges like strength or compulsion and that if she succeeds and still believes that this is what she wants that he will give her the cure.

On the street, Elena tells Rebekah that she is going to fail and that she should be locking herself inside not out shopping for prom. Rebekah replies that there isn't a more human experience than prom. Really?  What it means to be human can be reduced to getting dressed up and going to prom? Why oh why is a thousand years old woman interested in prom? Elena points out that Rebekah will not be able to compel herself a date. Rebekah asks why she should listen to Elena because her humanity has been turned off and adds that Elena is living with her now because no one else can tolerate her. Elena says that she is going to stay with her to make sure that Rebekah passes Elijah's test because as soon as she takes the cure, no on will be able to use it on Elena.

Caroline is also dress shopping and Bonnie tells her about the dream she had about Jeremy.  Caroline believes its because Bonnie never got to say goodbye and that she is grieving.  Bonnie points out that the couch was on fire and wonders if it is because she was emotional in her dream or because she cannot control her power without Shane's help.  Caroline asserts its because Bonnie needs a night off from mourning. Elena and Rebekah walk into the store, so Caroline and Bonnie make a hasty exit.

Later that night, Elena is wearing the same dress that Caroline chose, when Stefan arrives in a limo with flowers to pick her up.  Elena is not happy to see him and says that she does not need a babysitter but Stefan points out that the last time he saw her, she snapped the spine of a waitress.  When she turns, Damon is there and adds that they are there to make sure she keeps up her end of the bargain and forces a corsage on her arm.

Klaus is staring at the fireplace when Caroline walks in calling his name.  Klaus says that he is in no mood for company. Caroline tells him that Elena stole her prom dress and adds that the vervain is out of the town's water supply, which means that the store keeper was compelled.  Klaus starts to laugh and Caroline tells him that it's not funny.  She adds that though prom isn't important to him, it is important to her.  Klaus suggests that finding another dress should be easy for her and Caroline whines, yes whines that she doesn't want another dress. Caroline adds that she wants to look Princess Grace of Monaco hot and asks if Klaus will dig her up a dress of royal caliber. Am I the only one who thinks its weird for a thousand year old vampire to cart around gowns just cause?

Stefan and Damon escort Elena to the prom and Elena pauses at a picture of her and Matt on the first day of freshman year. Matt is walking in with Bonnie and asks why he feels like they are at a practice run of Caroline's wedding.  Damon is taking a drink and Elena points out that it is creepy for him to be at the prom because he's over age.  Now it occurs to her that there is something icky about a vampire who is over 100 years old involving himself with teenagers - talk about late to the party. Damon replies that no bad ass senior is complete without a date who is slightly to old for high school. Elena starts to drink and says that Damon is not her date but Damon counters and says that he is her boyfriend.  Elena asks if Damon is trying to stir feelings in her and reminds him that he is the one who had her turn them off. Elena tells Damon that he is nothing to her and so Damon asks why she told him that she is in love with him and the most real thing in her life. Elena answers that she only said those things because she was sired to him and that now that she isn't, she knows that none of it was real before walking away.

Thursday, March 28, 2013

This Is Your Life: Rebekah

'Claire Holt' photo (c) 2012, vagueonthehow - license: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/

Rebekah

What is she?:  Rebekah Mikaelson is a thousand year old original vampire who is obsessed with becoming human so she can have babies.

Biography: Rebekah Mikaelson is one of the Original Vampires, 1,000 years old, one of the first of their kind. She came to America with her siblings and her parents - including her witch mother. When her mother cast a spell to grant her children eternal life, she turned them into vampires that can only be killed with the White Oak. All other vampires draw their ancestry from one of the siblings. Since her creation Rebekah has wandered the world and spent a lot of it looking for love and some way to become human, angsting about it - and being locked in coffins by her brother, which is something of a habit of his. She really needs a hobby - and joining high schools and pretending to be a teenager isn’t a hobby, it’s creepy.

What We love about her: Well, not a lot to be honest. But she hates Elena, that’s one thing, we’re always behind someone who isn’t on Elena’s fanclub.

What we hate about her: Rebekah loves angst so much that when she is not busy planning to go to the prom and becoming the world’s first vampire cheerleaders (and we have to say, this 1,000 year old vampire obsessed with becoming a teenager is more than a little creepy), she has to stir the pot. Of all the vampires on The Vampire Diaries, Rebekah is by far the most childlike and by that I don’t mean the whole “it’s a small world after all” deal, but a ridiculous 2 year old; constantly 3 seconds away from a full blown temper tantrum. Her obsession with being human is not even remotely explained on the show - at best some nebulous wish to have children (like there are no other ways?) and to fall in love (which vampires seem to do quite often - at least when Elena is around). The minute a male pays the slightest attention to her, she begins fawning immediately.  Despite all of her power and strength, Rebekah has zero self confidence and extremely low self esteem.

Television Series: The Vampire Diaries

Monday, September 24, 2012

Face Off: We don't Forgive You

'Asking For Forgiveness' photo (c) 2011, Vic - license: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/

One common arc we see in a lot of Urban Fantasy is the redemption tale. After all, we are dealing with big bad monsters here, sometimes finding their humanity can be an epic tale in its own right. After the bodies are buried, the monster raises its bloodstained maw to the sky and gasps “what have I done?!” and begins the long, painful path to redemption.

Or, y’know, they could say sorry and everyone will pat them on the back and say “there-there” and next week we’ll treat them as if they’d done no wrong. Unfortunately, this is where they lose us. We’re not against a good redemption tale, we are against short cutting redemption and, ultimately, there are characters we do not forgive, even if the rest of the cast does.



Stefan Salvatore: The Vampire Diaries

Stefan is well known as the ripper because he feeds so viciously that he actually serves the heads of his victims. When he goes off the deep end with Klaus, Elena, Damon and Alaric are determined to get him back. This is of course after seeing dead bodies that he has left behind, as well as a long list of the kills that he has made. After learning exactly how many people that Stefan has killed, as well as the manner in which he killed them, of course Elena still wuvs him. Her willingness to forgive him continues the love triangle which has become essential to the plot. Elena may have forgiven him, but we certainly do not.


Damon Salvatore: The Vampire Diaries

When Damon made his first appearance in season one he was the antagonist.  He killed indiscriminately and worked very hard to terrorize Mystic Falls. Over the seasons to come, he has slowly been redeemed because other antagonists arrived, and combined with his growing love for Elena, this quickly put him on team good guy. Damon still uses his powers in ways that are harmful and though it is occasionally acknowledged, like when he turned Andie Star into a virtual slave using his powers, it is not taken seriously.  It is seen more as Damon being self-destructive, rather than him abusing Andie and his powers. Elena even forgives Damon for killing her own brother.  If you look at the bodies and violence that Damon has left in his wake, there is clearly nothing redeemable about him but still yet, Elena has forgiven him repeatedly. She may be willing to turn the other cheek, but we most certainly will not.