Saturday, March 22, 2014

The Vampire Diaries, Season 5, Episode 16: While You Were Sleeping

Party time – booze and Elena dancing on the table and taking off her top (revealing a second top underneath) – which apparently isn’t her and she’s outraged that they don’t realise it isn’t her – I mean, dancing on the table and giving her little brother hard booze! The very idea.

Do I point out now that EVERYONE on this show has been drinking hard liquor since they were like 12? It’s not like they even drink beer – it’s whiskey or nothing. Jeremy has been drinking hard booze in bars since season 1.

Anyway it’ a dream and Elena wakes up (I had the strangest dream – I dreamt that I actually objected to tequila shots… what a nightmare). The whole place is empty except for Stefan and she has been magically trapped in the building. Stefan gives her a recap about being possessed and now being a Ripper vampire that eats vampires. They’re working on a ration system to supply blood.

Damon is still chained in the dungeon (or rechained) with Jeremy and Matt there to remind him that they don’t like him very much because of the whole killing people thing (Jeremy is actually holding more of a grudge over the death of Aaron than he is over Damon trying to kill him. Or Vicky.) When his phone rings and Jeremy answers it he even reminds Jeremy that he’s murdered him before – oh such hijinks! Anyway, Damon and Elena talk full of goopiness and her apologising to him for Katherine breaking her heart (I think it’s more “I am sorry that happened to you” sorry than “it’s all my fault” sorry). Then she brings up Aaron, which Damon quickly avoids.

Caroline is in Dr. Wes’s lab looking for a cure and gets his notes on the werewolf venom being added to Elena’s dose – and she meets Enzo who is very flirty, very very very sexy and claims to have the antidote.

Stefan arrives with Elena’s ration – and she’s a starving killing machine in the presence of vampire blood. She starts angsting and Caroline rings to drop the news about the werewolf venom as well – and if they want the cure, Enzo insists they meet. Apparently the cure is Traveller related and they want to keep themselves secret from Liv. Just in case there aren’t enough emotional issues floating around, Elena always wants to know if she and Stefan did anything while Katherine was possessing her and trying to get Stefan back

Because this information is a priority right now.

When Stefan leaves she tries to call Aaron (since she doesn’t use a spirit board she gets now answer) and she opens her diary and comically over-acts at the fact KATHERINE HAS WRITTEN IN IT! This leads to a really freaky dream sequence about making out with Stefan and Stefan and Damon fighting – have we just stopped trying to make sense now, Vampire Diaries? She wakes up with a nose bleed.

She calls Damon with her theory that the werewolf venom virus is actually hurting her and causing her to hallucinate her worst fears. Or it could be a side-effect of long term Traveller possession but being Vampire Diaries I’m going to guess that her first guess will magically prove to be right. Anyway more angst, some coughing up blood, some recaps, more avoiding talking about Aaron.

Liv is all happy that she managed to pull off a vampire caging spell but Bonnie brings her down from being too gleeful (aside from anything else, if a vampire hears you it will eat you).

Caroline and Stefan go to meet Enzo and are approached by Sloane and a passel of Travellers. Blah blah exposition – basically they want to find the cure because Elena is a doppleganger and therefore precious to them (I’m pretty sure before the Travellers wanted the dopplegangers dead, but hey, why am I not shocked at yet more people finding Elena precious on this show?) and they’re almost there after experimenting on Enzo but they need a final ingredient – a Stefan doppelgänger (other than Stefan).

It will also shock no-one to learn that the last doppelgänger’s (Elena and Stefan) are super-duper special. But only if they are the only ones left in the entire world – so they need to find Stefan’s double and kill him. They need to do a finding spell on Stefan to find this sacrificial lamb which involves lots of worry and distress.

The spell is painful and unpleasant and they find the doppelgänger in Atlanta – he’s an EMT. But the Travellers keep pushing despite Stefan’s distress so Caroline intervenes with a knife.

Elena has another angsty hallucination and is picked up from the floor by Luke, who mentions being dumped by his boyfriend and assumes she is very very drunk. So offers to go drinking with her. And she wonders why no-one questioned her giving Jeremy tequila shots? He also seems to know rather a lot about her life. She starts to turn him so she can feed on him – but finds that he already has healing bite wounds on his neck, probably from Katherine. She compels him to go find Bonnie.

Elena calls Damon and freaks out on multiple levels before breaking her phone. In the face of Elena losing her ever loving mind, Damon takes Matt hostage.

Elena continues her freak out and starts burning her possessions when Bonnie and Live arrive – and Elena impales Liv on a thrown piece of wood. She can drop the shield and get the nice healy vampire blood, or she can die. (Or she could go to a hospital).

Liv chose option Life so Elena is free and wandering the streets which is such a good idea. She hallucinates Aaron again – but it’s really Damon with an emergency blood stash. She continues to freak out – including thinking she killed Aaron. Damon confesses that he killed Aaron – not because of the virus, but because he was having an angsty strop over being dumped. Enzo then arrives with the cure

Back to a recovering Stefan and Caroline reveals she made a deal with Sloane – she will help kill Stefan’s doppelgänger if Sloane wouldn’t try to do it remotely by frying Stefan’s brain. She’s off to do some murdering with Enzo.

Liv seems quite casual about being stabbed in the stomach and goes into her room after assuring Bonnie she really wants to learn – but when she goes into her room she lights all the many many candles with a gesture. Luke is in there – he’s her brother (and reminds us he’s gay again, at least they’re not making it a tiny one time mention – but I do hope he can actually manage a conversation without including “I’m gay” in there somewhere). Luke only pretended to be compelled and they’re both plotting nefarious things.

Elena is sad with Damon… because he didn’t see through Katherine’s cunning plan. Damon boggles at the extent Elena is going to try and let him dodge responsibility for killing Aaron, blaming it on Katherine. He, very realistically, points out that him going on a killing spree because she dumped him and her staying with him DESPITE said killing spree is the very definition of a toxic relationship. She resolves to blame him – blame him for making her bend her morals and defend him because she loves him and cannot stop so simply has to.

Ye gods, yes I’m going with toxic. Damon says it cannot work – they do not work together – and it has to end…

Then they kiss and have sex. Sorry Aaron, you may be dead and all, but Damon is smoking hot.

So Vampire Diaries has another gay character. After the gay cowboy mind controlled to have sex with women in season 1, Caroline’s gay dad arriving to “out” her before she got to all but play “Born This Way” while her dad tortured her with conversion therapy (yes, really) before he is stabbed in a closet (I see what you did there) and then committing passive suicide because he couldn’t accept himself (I see what you did there as well) and The Originals dragging Josh out of the plot box only when near-stranger-who-he-is-oddly-willing-to-die-for-Davina wants something in between making lots of grossly appropriative comparisons between him being gay and her being a witch…

…Well, let’s just say I’m not getting my hopes up.

Is there a reason why they’re even keeping Damon locked up if they keep making the same mistakes? Vampire is super strong and super fast. If you get within arm’s reach of vampire, he can kill you. This is why he is chained up. If you step within arm’s reach, you might as well not bother chaining him. It’s not a complicated concept.

They seem to have started a whole new crop of storylines here but I’m unsure how they’re going to develop to any great degree before the end of the season – especially when we factor in requisite isn’t Elena-special-sad-emotional moments?

Interestingly every magic (except Bonnie’s) on this show seems to have its limitations. The Traveller’s seem to require both chanting and a huge backing chorus – so why can they always surprise people? Why don’t one of these vampires figure out “hey I’m visiting the Travellers – I will run away if there are more than three of them”?

I’m actually kind of happy that Damon recognises how very toxic their relationship is (though everyone has a death count on this show and no-one seems to care) – and the ending it is actually probably a good idea (assuming Damon can refrain from killing sprees). I wondered if this would grow into anything decent or just be a source of angst. I was impressed.

Then they kissed. Which basically says “yes it’s toxic and evil and destructive and unhealthy but damn you’re hot”.

Wait, are they cured now or what? Did Enzo appear? Was he a hallucination?

And if they are cured... isn't that awfully soon? Surely the storyline potential of the Ripper virus is HUGE and they're going to resolve it so quickly?